Apr 4, 2007

mr t, foo

Speaking of Rocky (not to mention April Foo's Day), here are a few random fact about Mr. T. (in the genre of "Chuck Norris Facts"):

  • Mr. T pities the fool who pities fools. "I pity the fools who pity fools. If you pity fools, you're one of the fools I pity when I pity fools," Mr T once said after pitying a bunch of pitiful fools.

  • If Mr. T steps on a crack, Mother Nature breaks her back.

  • Mr T can actually speak braille.

  • Before Mr. T, the alphabet only had 25 letters.

  • Children often mistake Mr. T's head for a coconut. Rather than pitying the kids (which would be devastating to them), he embraces their folly and turns them into crime fighting gymnasts.

  • A little-known amendment to the U.S. constitution says that, "Every vote is assumed to be for Mr. T, unless otherwise specified." Due to this and sagging voter participation, Mr. T has won every election in the United States for the past 30 years. He has declined taking office, however, as he does not want to put up with all the "jibba-jabba."

  • Mr.T pities the fools who don't eat his cereal, as it is the only known source of Vitamin T.

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