tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-157337942024-03-13T00:28:08.823-04:00don't call me Veronicatonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.comBlogger1177125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-4043698641314959742022-09-16T14:53:00.004-04:002022-09-16T14:53:39.338-04:00church, and Church<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVHviA1hWYWlW8skePuKmXzc0eya-Gury-4Au5lAYrS703V0y755dg_bkKaePaw8_dQ32BU2jAX7N8HDzG23UXv1YbKa461f1MD4jcV613QUjTD9WOt08Nazou1XrH-qedVagDRmYB1CfV4C18887CZeKXZjVZBmf1I8d_wzSmwDWtZu6Yaw/s1000/abc.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1000" data-original-width="1000" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVHviA1hWYWlW8skePuKmXzc0eya-Gury-4Au5lAYrS703V0y755dg_bkKaePaw8_dQ32BU2jAX7N8HDzG23UXv1YbKa461f1MD4jcV613QUjTD9WOt08Nazou1XrH-qedVagDRmYB1CfV4C18887CZeKXZjVZBmf1I8d_wzSmwDWtZu6Yaw/w200-h200/abc.png" width="200" /></a></div><br />A friend of mine recently posted something on Facebook that caught my eye.<p></p><p>This is someone who was a part of the church I used to serve as Lead Pastor, and for a moment I thought it was a description of something happening in this person's life now, or perhaps a throw back to the past. Here's the post in its entirety:</p><blockquote> The pastor says they sit front and center. The gay boys. Sometimes they hold hands. And some folks have said he should address the issue. But the pastor tells me he doesn’t know what to say. And then there’s the man who sneaks in the back door. Fresh off the street. After the service starts. And leaves before alter call. The people sitting close complain about how bad he smells. Of beer and smoke and sweat. But the pastor tells me he doesn’t know what to say. And then there’s the young mama who wears dirty skin and lets her four children come in and eat all the donuts and drink all the watered-down juice. Some church staff say they “…eat like little pigs. Like they haven’t eaten in weeks.” While the mama just stands there and lets them. And the elders say something must be done and said. But the pastor tells me he doesn’t know what to say. And there’s the whore sitting among the faithful. And everybody knows her. She sits with a painted-up face, cheap perfume, and a broken heart. And those who sit close, well, they all treat her for what they think she is. And at the last staff meeting, her name came up. Something must be done about her. But the pastor tells me he doesn’t know what to say. <br /><br />
The pastor is a good man. Holy and just. And he wants to do the “right and loving” thing. And he wants to “look like Jesus”. And he asks me if I have any thoughts on anything he could say.<br /><br />
Yes, sweet Pastor. I do.<br /><br />
Start with this and say it Louder than any other words: <br /><br />
“Welcome to Church. This is a place of love and hope and safety and forgiveness. We will be food for the hungry. Living water for the thirsty. We are so glad you are here. You are invited. You are loved. Come on in—we’ve been waiting on you. Welcome here. We are the church.”<br /><br />
Say that. To the called and to the called-out. To the leaders and the greeters. To the dirty and the clean. We are all the same. We are.<br /><br />
May we blow the dust of religion out of our souls and choose affection instead. May our words and actions and reactions be a sanctuary for all. <br /><br />
Jesus broke many laws ( man's law not God's law ) to love. So, Jesus, be our voice. Be the only words we should ever speak.<br /><br />
*copied from a friend*<br /></blockquote><b>Then I realized, "Ah! This is one of those copy-and-paste-it posts." </b><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: start;"><b> </b></div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: start;"><b>Still, I felt compelled to reply. So I did. </b></div><p></p><blockquote><span>This stopped me for a moment... I honestly had a "Wait, what?" flashback.</span><br /><br /><span>Because during a season at Connection, there was a gay couple who came every week and sat in the center of the front row. Only we didn't ignore them, but had some amazing conversations for months... they later moved to another state. </span><br /><br /><span>And there was an "scented" man who came in after spending time on the street. He eventually found a church family in us and stepped into the mission. </span><br /><br /><span>I started to realize this wasn't a flashback, though, as we never did Sunday donuts and juice - but during VBS, we did have kids who came in needing food and worn out moms who didn't know where to find it... so we gave them an abundance of the sugary snacks and later provided bags of food from the food pantry. </span><br /><br /><span>As far as who the local "whore" was, I'm not sure. So let's just say it symbolically was any of us, or all of us, or just me - and we all needed to be seen for who we actually are versus what the broad stroke of chit-chat or quick summaries said we were.</span><br /><br /><span>I believe the same is true of church. We will find what we are looking for.</span><br /><br /><span>If we're looking to find reasons why it falls short, we will find those reasons. </span><br /><br /><span>If we're looking to find reasons why Jesus said it/we are worth giving His life for, we will find those reasons.</span><br /><br /><span>If we're looking for reasons to not attend one regularly, we will find those reasons.</span><br /><br /><span>If we're looking for reasons to take the plank out of our own eyes and grab hold of Jesus who He loves us as we are and walks us into transformation while holding us along the way, we will find those reasons.</span><br /><br /><span>Oh... may we determine what it is we're looking for...</span><br /><span>or else we will find what we presume we're looking for.</span><br /><br /><span>"[Let us honor] the true Bride of her Husband, because she is the wife of so great a Lord. And what shall I say? How great is that Husband and of singular rank, that He discovered a prostitute and made her a virgin. Because she should not deny that she was a prostitute, lest she forget the mercy of her Liberator. How can it be said that she was not a prostitute when she fornicated with demons and idols? Fornication was in the heart of everyone; a few have fornicated in the flesh, but everyone has fornicated in his heart. And He came and made her a virgin; He made the church a virgin.* - Augustine</span><br /><br /><span class="ggolc4ur rifmn7f6">#BeTheChurch</span></blockquote><p><b><i>‘...love... as Christ loved the church when he gave himself up for her’. (Ephesians 5:25) </i></b><br /></p><span class="ggolc4ur rifmn7f6"></span><p></p>tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-59292663706273424902021-09-29T01:47:00.005-04:002021-09-29T04:28:13.746-04:00this is the dream<p>As I write this, it has officially turned midnight...</p><p>which means it's September 29, 2021.</p><p><b>That's my birthday. </b></p><p>If you know when I was born, you know this is a significant birthday numerically. I've always enjoyed being somewhat elusive about telling people my age. I just did it again.<br /></p><p>Keep in mind, I have no issue with my age, nor have I ever. Rather, I find that others do - perhaps because I've been a pastor for a long while, and there have been times when I've shared my age and the reaction was, "Wow, you're way too young to know anything." Other times when I've shared my age, the opposite response came out with, "Wow, you're a lot older than I thought, and suddenly I'm not sure if I can relate to you."</p><p>Whatever.</p><p>I'm 50 years old today.</p><p>Yep, I wrote it. It's there, in black and white. So what? Deal with it.</p><p>Maybe I shouldn't and instead brace myself for some cheesy barrage of people who want to harass me with all the exhausting "over the hill" napkins and party horns. I'm sure if that's waiting for me, the people behind it love me and assume I'd enjoy the ribbing. <br /></p><p>The truth is... I'm excited to be 50. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcB4f_UvyJiiYLb5oAtSYMiLUJuL2Z4g6iFi2gX6-tvjLMYBgpcP_0vjEOUujr2oESSiGSpk3OLPRPkb_xXdZvoDHlM8H9BJZoQ9MfenYWjqjxhuCpQ1K1_kqaaIYzLnYbupuQ/s949/kick.jpg" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="896" data-original-width="949" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcB4f_UvyJiiYLb5oAtSYMiLUJuL2Z4g6iFi2gX6-tvjLMYBgpcP_0vjEOUujr2oESSiGSpk3OLPRPkb_xXdZvoDHlM8H9BJZoQ9MfenYWjqjxhuCpQ1K1_kqaaIYzLnYbupuQ/w237-h224/kick.jpg" width="237" /></a></div><p></p><p>Not in a sassy, "WOO-HOO! LOOK AT ME! DON'T BE HATIN' ON ME!" rally cry. My enthusiasm for being 50 isn't artificial adrenaline, nor a shield I wield out loud to cover some insecurity underneath. <br /></p><p><b>I'm 50, which means I'm on the front end of a prime time in my life</b>.</p><p>In these next years, I'll watch my boys continue to emerge into adulthood. They're already godly men whom I wish I could grow up and become. </p><p>Joshua loves the Lord and decided through a rather challenging year to grab hold of Jesus instead of caving into his weariness. If he was a tree and you could look inside at the rings that have been formed, this year would be a definitive circle of the storms he weathered and the rooted internal joy in Christ he claimed. I've watched him grow into an understanding of himself and his calling to ministry that I can't believe I get to get a front row seat to. He's the real deal. Yet somehow, he's also Peter Pan... and at the same time, Dr Seuss... and maybe Joshua from the Bible, too. Or maybe he's just Joshua. #Epic</p><p>Daniel likewise is solid with God, caring about others and has a compass that always points to true north. He does this not just out of morality, but out of trust, faith and surrender. I've likewise seen him be faithful during a tough year of work and as he just recently begin to intern at our church in problem solving and projects. He could be a unique pastor, lawyer, or a financial advisor, or an IT guy, or apologist, or... the list is endless... I'm pretty sure he's going to change the world whatever he goes with.. maybe through one of those roles, or maybe something else. I've watched him go "all in" every day on whatever it is he's doing, and it's breathtaking. He tenderly calls me out so I can boldly live upward. #Wow</p><p>Johanna is both a girl of God, and a tween of God, and a woman of God. She serves and gives, then gives and serves. She's exploding with creativity and wants to use it to worship the Lord, be it in art, singing, dance or otherwise. She says yes to many great things, but also knows how to turn other things down. Anytime I ask her for a favor, she's eager to do it. And... please, please, Lord... let her affection for stuffed animals, unicorns and all things people forever remain. I'm in awe of this little lady whose heart and faith are huge, and whose spontanenous house dance party moves rival my own. #Wonder #Full</p><p>Katie is still surprising me with her stretchy heart that loves me, and loves me again, and loves me again. She digs deep, confesses her emotions, reaches for Truth, blesses us daily, and finds a space in the church to place her hand and push it forward (whether or not anyone sees it). She radically loves her neighbors. She takes on new challenges. She prays and inspires. And when it's all messy, it's gloriously messy. I'm so, so thankful for her. #Bride</p><p>So what do I have to complain out?</p><p>Sure, I could make a list. I know I've had many moments where I had to. Right now, I'm choosing not to. And even when I have to again, I hope I will say this...</p><p><b>"This is the dream." <br /></b></p><p>Lord, You're here with me. Wherever you are is Home.</p><p>Sure, I'd like some more money today and retirement funding for later. I'd like to have some different body parts or a faster metabolism. It'd be great if I wasn't misunderstood in "that direction" or overlooked in "the other direction." Maybe I could pout if I really want to.</p><p>I don't want to.</p><p><b>"This is the dream."</b></p><p>I may not be at the end of the dream, but I'm right in the middle of it. I'll trust that what I can't yet see will come in due time. Meanwhile, I'll take in what I can see and thank the Lord for it - both the aches and the awesome, the problems and the praise, the breakdowns and the breakthroughs.</p><p>I'm reminded of Joseph who had dreams from God about how one day something amazing would happen in his life. Then he was rejected by his family, sold into slavery, tempted to sin, falsely accused when he did the right thing, imprisoned and forgotten. Only at the end of his life did the final moment of the dream come true, but he was in the steps and stages of the dream that whole time.</p><p>So I will praise the Lord, regardless of the stage of the dream I am... even if it some days feels like a nightmare.</p><p><b>"This is the dream."</b></p><p>Today is my birthday. I will spend it with my loved ones who love me.</p><p>Where are you at when you read this?</p><p>Take a look around, and take it in. You are also in the middle of what God is creating that has yet to be fully revealed.</p><p>Say it with me...</p><p>"This is the dream."<b> </b></p><p>Trust me. I'm 50. :)<br /></p>tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-12116680400696663652021-09-11T13:49:00.007-04:002021-09-11T13:50:08.923-04:00everything changed<p><b></b></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG20oSbNtEbTta1qf2KXuNW9gEvGSfqR_xqLDGXpkkWjEpZ1eDF_upOQNvXku6vgfFSwZCOeAxnmq-ujf6qrBnGLzN8XgV2CCh9PbvcA2hEH9I0UjwhUiE6lUx8xvO8UXlmvR4/s1024/e-sfcquxiactrie.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="666" data-original-width="1024" height="208" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG20oSbNtEbTta1qf2KXuNW9gEvGSfqR_xqLDGXpkkWjEpZ1eDF_upOQNvXku6vgfFSwZCOeAxnmq-ujf6qrBnGLzN8XgV2CCh9PbvcA2hEH9I0UjwhUiE6lUx8xvO8UXlmvR4/s320/e-sfcquxiactrie.jpg" width="320" /></a></b></div><b><br />Everything changed.<br /></b><br />
I was about 45 minutes from home, taking the day of September 11, 2001 to study and spend time with God. As I heard slices of news on the radio, I made my way to a random Best Buy. On dozens and dozens of TVs, I stood among many strangers as the attacks happened. I knew I needed to go home to be with my wife and newborn son. <p></p><p><b>Everything changed.<br /></b><br />
In the days that followed, it was the only thing on TV. Stories we were interested before now seemed "stupid" in comparison. Airlines shut down. Unifying bewilderment created unifying friendships. Churches were full for multiple weeks as people wondered questions out loud they'd stuffed down for years and returned to their roots. </p><p><b>Everything changed.<br /></b><br />
Then time passed. Travel took on new restrictions. The economy was different. We weren't sure if we should root for war or against it, but knew that soldiers and front-line workers were to be our heroes. Many of us became an expert (in our own eyes) and returned back to sillier stories. Social media launched - that amplified it all. </p><p><b>Everything changed.<br /></b><br />
It's been years since then - so many years, in fact, that we're more aware of the effects of 9/11 to such a degree that the 20 year anniversary sort of snuck up on many of us (be honest). We've been slugging away at being right so long that it's been a while since we've "gotten right" with ourselves, with each other and with God. We don't know when the next global "something" will happen, nor if the global "somethings" we're currently in will get better or worse. We just know that our side of things can never, never, never, never, never, never, never appear to be wrong, so we've trained ourselves to argue well and point fingers with longer endurance than our *alleged) opponents. </p><p><b>Everything changed.<br /></b><br />
Centuries earlier, a Man unlike any other man walked the earth. It happened in an era of chaos in the known world as one group tried to bully another group, and countless people felt overlooked. Right then and there, in the fullness of time, this Man lived among us, yet was different than all of us. He taught, cared, healed, corrected, reset, guided... showed us holiness and grace simultaneously... and predicted His death and resurrection (and then both happened). Even as the world (and the world of everyone in it) was collapsing, He stayed on a Cross to show us another way. The impact of that Man, Jesus Christ, still can impact you today... and perhaps if you genuinely invite Him in today as your Savior and Lord/Leader, then tomorrow you can genuinely claim something new and lasting in a world full of destructive ideas, words and actions. Perhaps if you humble yourself now into Him, you can every day that follows look in the mirror and remember it, owning... </p><p><b>"Everything changed."<br /></b><br />
If that's a step you're open to take,<br />
here's a next step to that big step<br />
that changes every step:<br />
<a href="https://myrc.church/yes/">https://myrc.church/yes/</a></p>tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-52316585554125829062019-03-20T01:33:00.003-04:002019-03-20T01:33:25.913-04:00concern about worry<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOd8H6l_vhdm06t1c3XPDhGTGzlitldfmNWo5X3A88JSxX8An1qSggpIj1yIB3prfsbWtYfH5Vx_JF5LXwmOA5yZxC3Od9q3759CX13W4S6izzy7yVpaeIDyGyQOFzcYM9orD1/s1600/mg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="285" data-original-width="425" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOd8H6l_vhdm06t1c3XPDhGTGzlitldfmNWo5X3A88JSxX8An1qSggpIj1yIB3prfsbWtYfH5Vx_JF5LXwmOA5yZxC3Od9q3759CX13W4S6izzy7yVpaeIDyGyQOFzcYM9orD1/s320/mg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Be concerned.</b></span><br />
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It's healthy.<br />
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Concern is clarifying.
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Concern is inquisitive.
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Concern reminds you of what you can spend time on.
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And that guides you.
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<b>So be "concerned."
</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>But... don't "worry."
</b></span><br />
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It's unhealthy.
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Worry is concern gone bad.
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Worry is concern with mold.
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Worry reminds you of what you can't spend time on.
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<br />
And that suffocates you.
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: #660000;"><i><b>"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?" (Jesus, Matthew 6:22-27)</b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-88058641760385556082018-10-03T11:46:00.001-04:002018-10-03T11:46:19.705-04:00paradoxes of relationships<span style="font-size: large;">Paradoxes of relationships...</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSGQ84Az9VFvBWLD0htWx3HbBFAwyZ8l3eEtzIHBoD8IYmCnpSsjZRiPE0sHq2e0OaJpWHJSJqscesk5iwM3VYyIupfGgqzmSNhO9t52Q0uL3GVyPR5rbbl-62_d7B8p7mVmvK/s1600/manage-work-relationship-810x540.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="540" data-original-width="810" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSGQ84Az9VFvBWLD0htWx3HbBFAwyZ8l3eEtzIHBoD8IYmCnpSsjZRiPE0sHq2e0OaJpWHJSJqscesk5iwM3VYyIupfGgqzmSNhO9t52Q0uL3GVyPR5rbbl-62_d7B8p7mVmvK/s320/manage-work-relationship-810x540.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
1) Time ≠ Quality<br />
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2) "How I see us" ≠ "How you see us"<br />
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3) More Commitment ≠ More Belonging<br />
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And...<br />
<br />
4) Language -> Thoughts<br />
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5) Pursuing self -> Wanting more than self<br />
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6) Clarity -> Questions<br />
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The simplicity of community is complextonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-86029884294653574342018-08-01T00:00:00.000-04:002018-08-01T12:31:09.489-04:00one year laterOnce upon a time, I lived in Ohio...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVJzy-anktymaLPOq_r83plqxbhPJbEglI452d1IAdLfWDl-tiWCOHVglIs-Z4E-Fmo4vpm_rRDlAlFpzD6LtoBOjdKrOEIHFknc8tzFdOOlzjZeWRjiFFuoBis34YI7AozkCW/s1600/m00.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVJzy-anktymaLPOq_r83plqxbhPJbEglI452d1IAdLfWDl-tiWCOHVglIs-Z4E-Fmo4vpm_rRDlAlFpzD6LtoBOjdKrOEIHFknc8tzFdOOlzjZeWRjiFFuoBis34YI7AozkCW/s320/m00.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
I was a senior pastor...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZbgJar-ScxarTCApU2bcfzkIPxMGgKfpJycAFYNjrwU0uHiVsPKCDnQEn9ixQGgtmwFhk7-iISrK7nOHhucmRYJbXEMvNsyAiqLaiTF7Vc8TihxsIW__9GoiG_7nSFDHRi_Nn/s1600/pt.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="275" data-original-width="434" height="202" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZbgJar-ScxarTCApU2bcfzkIPxMGgKfpJycAFYNjrwU0uHiVsPKCDnQEn9ixQGgtmwFhk7-iISrK7nOHhucmRYJbXEMvNsyAiqLaiTF7Vc8TihxsIW__9GoiG_7nSFDHRi_Nn/s320/pt.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
I drove a small aqua car.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3hZHjrAZFtZzBdzHy34DtnlFvWXX4WvtoH8UcSl80TWuqo9DnsZtLyqOl5aMSmeIhgiqRwQ-fnf7MNTb3PXyHL2mcHMFA2IRCwfYj8NdhShBWFtIfq0mB2fCHL5qv2PMOddSp/s1600/m50.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="540" data-original-width="960" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3hZHjrAZFtZzBdzHy34DtnlFvWXX4WvtoH8UcSl80TWuqo9DnsZtLyqOl5aMSmeIhgiqRwQ-fnf7MNTb3PXyHL2mcHMFA2IRCwfYj8NdhShBWFtIfq0mB2fCHL5qv2PMOddSp/s320/m50.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
I did other things, too. I led regional serving days that brought churches together. I wrote a weekly newspaper column that impacted our region for Jesus. I enjoyed the fine menu at Smoothie King.<br />
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I'd somehow also developed friendships with amazing people from all walks of life, from the average Joe or Jane making it through their day to so-and-so's who were thinking about everybody's tomorrow.<br />
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And I kept my office in our home. It allowed me to be continually around my favorite people in the world (my family) while deepening and widening my ministry to my next favorite people in the world (God's family). Together, we'd committed to reach people for Jesus. <br />
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And we saw so, so many people come to Jesus through it.<br />
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For ten years, I lived this kind of life out as best as I knew how.<br />
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It was a blessing. I didn't deserve it.<br />
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Now I live in Minnesota.<br />
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<br />
I'm a pastor overseeing an incredible student ministry...<br />
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I drive a Ford Escape.<br />
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I do other things, too. I'm finishing a book I've been writing for almost four years with my son Daniel. This is in addition to other writing I somehow get to do, too. And I travel when I can, trying to mentor others around the country in what I've learned.<br />
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And I keep my office in a great church. It's allowed me to continually be around an amazing team of people who give their best daily. Whenever I can, I pop home for lunch - always eating at least one meal with my family.<br />
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We've seen so, so many people come to Jesus here.<br />
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For one year, I've lived this out.<br />
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It is a blessing. I don't deserve it.<br />
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<b>Today is the anniversary of my "start date."</b><br />
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And that's why I felt compelled to write all of this. Nothing good that I just mentioned was because of anything I did, but because of who God is.<br />
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So in reflection, after 365 days of making the most of Minnesota I got to thinking about how I spent my last Sunday with the church I was blessed to lead as it's pastor for a decade. They blessed my family so, so well with an amazing sendoff. I responded in kind by taking a moment to celebrate each person who showed up. It blew my mind at all the ministry we did together. They were so generous at blessing us with a Minnesota care package.<br />
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I'm also reminded of my last few moments I privately spent in the church building we'd created together. I was reminded of how we'd navigated three building projects to keep up with what God had been doing over the years. So much of it was a learning curve, as we did what we all could to help lead this, and maybe that's why those last few moments were so tender.<br />
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It was just the Lord and I... and so I walked through the building, starting at the stage. I saw the chords and lyrics to a worship song and it felt appropriate to sing it... so I did... slowly and meaningfully.<br />
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I paused where I'd preached for years just about every Sunday, thanking the Lord for the gift that opportunity was.<br />
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I gazed at the chairs that different people sat in over the years. Some were only with us a short time. Others came, left, came back again, and so on. And then there were those who were there all throughout the years. Every person in every chair was a miracle that I got to stare at as I spoke... knowing the story under their story and how amazing it was that they even showed up for church that day.<br />
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It again occurred to me that I was on holy ground. So I had to respond accordingly.<br />
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I then journeyed through different classrooms where my kids had learned their faith through phenomenal people who invested into them as teachers/helpers. <br />
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It all brought me back before the Cross.<br />
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I sat there for a while. I wept... I wasn't sure I was done being a senior pastor.<br />
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And yet I knew this was what God was calling me to do - to trust that my time in Ohio in that role was over... and that whatever was next in Minnesota was where He wanted me.<br />
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<i>"I'll get the lights," </i>I said to Him, leaving my key on the counter and closing the door behind me. <br />
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I honestly wrestled with this for a bit, especially when people seemed to regard my new role as a "lesser" role than being a senior pastor. <i>"Do you think you might ever go back to that role?"</i> I sometimes get asked.<br />
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I get it... sometimes that's just how people think of things. I wrestled with that question, too. And then I didn't worry about it anymore. Whatever I'm doing and wherever I am is up to God - He's put a passion in me for the future of His Church, and I'll live that out in whatever role He asks of me.<br />
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I'm not position hungry, nor am I position-shy. It's about being Jesus-centered and outward-focused. <br />
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Just a couple weeks ago someone randomly texted me about a senior pastor job they thought I was perfect for. It was perhaps an attractive offer, but at the same time a no-brainer that I didn't even have to spend a second on.<br />
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<i>"Thanks, but I'm not looking. I'm right where I need to be."</i><br />
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Yeah, that's Minnesota. I know the stereotypes like so many of you who warned me, "<i>You know, it's cold there." </i>Yes, it can be... and it can also be quite sunny and breathtaking.<br />
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It's been an intriguing year. I ended up teaching a class at a Christian college. I ate a Juicy Lucy. I went boating... more than once. I enjoyed the beauty of the state with my beautiful wife. I built storage - as if I actually knew what I was doing. I figured out how to take care of a pool - because I had no clue what I was doing. I made some great new friends. I did road trips. I realized Minnesota has all my favorite foods, including Portillo's. I grew to respect the pastoral and administrative staff of our church.<br />
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I grew in my love for my family. I watched them all grow into a new season of life. I became a part of our church's teaching team. I led people to Jesus. I got pranked in the office and pranked back.<br />
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<b>I have no clue what the next year holds, but I know Who holds it.</b><br />
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And I trust that being fully faithful and trusting in God's grace is the key to figuring out anything I need to figure out.<br />
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Tonight I'll invest into students, leaders and others they're connected to. It's an honor I pray I make the most of. <br />
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One year later...<br />
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I'm finding that the best "position" to be in is on the heels of Jesus, wherever He steps.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>"Come, follow me,” Jesus said... </b></i></span><br />
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<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>at once they left their nets and followed Him. (Mark 1:17-18)</b></i></span></blockquote>
<br />tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-39073027807017528902018-03-29T11:27:00.000-04:002018-03-30T11:32:25.484-04:00Holy Week thought: ThursdayA group of teenagers hanging out with Jesus... it wasn't the first time, and apparently it won't be the last time.
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Our church hosted an amazing Easter experience for our students during which I happened to catch these photos of two of our guy groups in a particular rotation. As they took part in watching a movie clip of Jesus with His disciples during the Last Supper, I watched as these young man all tried to dial into something they couldn't fully grasp... something none of us can fully grasp. Yet they tried anyway. The same was true for other groups of guys and girls throughout the night at different stations. <br />
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It occurred to me that they took part in something that happened 20 centuries ago... because 20 centuries ago a group of teenagers following Jesus did their best to dial into something they couldn't fully grasp.
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Ironic?
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Perhaps some days you don't feel like you fully understand all that you are learning about God or can't make sense out of everything the Bible teaches. I'm not so sure that it comes down to whether or not you or I can master it all, but if we will lean into the Master... for in doing so we can be contagious students. The same is true if you are a parent or leader and don't feel like you know what you're doing some days. The real challenge, if it is a challenge at all, is to pull up to the table with Jesus everyday, enjoy His company and follow His lead to take part in whatever He is leading you to do. As both history and my photo demonstrates, if we do this next generation will have an example to show them what to do with the "food" before them.
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A group of teenagers hanging out with Jesus... it wasn't the first time, and apparently it won't be the last time.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>"When it was evening, Jesus sat down at the table with the Twelve." (Matthew 26:20) </b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-54002509646155328532018-03-28T10:52:00.002-04:002018-03-28T11:00:00.011-04:00Holy Week thought: Wednesday<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Nothing. Or maybe... something?
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Sometimes it seems like God is quiet. Take today, for example - on Wednesday of Holy Week we aren't quite sure what Jesus and the disciples did. The Bible doesn't record it, and some scholars assume this was due to them simply resting together after the long journey. What is clear is that much happened on Thursday, and so we know by default that Jesus was quite alive on Wednesday despite us not having a record of it.
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Sound familiar?
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How often in life do we not know what God is up to? We see a blank page that we assume is blank, or we wonder if He's up to writing something in "invisible ink." As if, "What a rascal." Maybe.
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Or... maybe Jesus is quite alive and with you. Maybe His most important priority is not to say something new but to put His arm around you so you remember what is always true. Maybe He is creating a way for you to be simply resting together after the long journey.
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Sure, "Thursday" is coming... much will happen "then." And maybe even then this page will remain blank as you look back on it. You won't know what happened or why it happened.
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"Nothing. Or maybe... something?"
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Feel free to ask those questions to Jesus. But... also feel free to embrace His embrace today. Perhaps that in itself is more than enough.
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>"Be still and know I am God." (Psalm 46:10)</b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-66571286218322985492018-03-27T06:00:00.000-04:002018-03-28T10:55:19.510-04:00Holy Week thought: Tuesday<b>We can't fool Jesus... so why not instead embrace Him?
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On Tuesday morning, Jesus and his disciples returned to Jerusalem. They passed a withered fig tree on their way - an object lesson about how our lives are meant to produce fruit versus merely playing the part of a "tree."
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It's Jesus' direct challenge to the phrase many of us drop out there - "You can't judge me. Only God can judge me." The catch? He actually will judge each of us. And He actually would rather you get right with Him today and get rooted in Him than bust you with accountability for living life on your own terms.
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How easy is it for us to turn Easter into a time when we show how "religious" we are? How much more fruitful would it be to quit playing the game and letting every day be fruitful in Christ, through Christ, and for Christ?
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<blockquote>
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>Jesus was matter-of-fact: “Embrace this God-life. Really embrace it, and nothing will be too much for you. This mountain, for instance: Just say, ‘Go jump in the lake’—no shuffling or shilly-shallying—and it’s as good as done. That’s why I urge you to pray for absolutely everything, ranging from small to large. Include everything as you embrace this God-life, and you’ll get God’s everything. And when you assume the posture of prayer, remember that it’s not all asking. If you have anything against someone, forgive—only then will your heavenly Father be inclined to also wipe your slate clean of sins." (Mark 11)</b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-48295245857182758372018-03-26T07:00:00.000-04:002018-03-28T10:59:39.950-04:00Holy Week thought: Monday<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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How often are we confused, thinking we "weep" for our culture when we're actually just disappointed in our culture? Seriously, recognize the difference.
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Weeping involves being changed by the ache and becoming a change-agent in the trenches. Disappointment involves being frustrated by the ache and critiquing it from a couch.
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Jesus knew the difference... He took the time to weep, and then He took the time to humbly die for us. What would it look like to follow in His footsteps today?
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>And when Jesus drew near and saw the city, He wept over it, saying, “Would that you, even you, had known on this day the things that make for peace! But now they are hidden from your eyes." (Luke 19:41)</b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-33575908491454605182018-03-02T18:17:00.001-05:002018-03-02T18:19:43.431-05:00the sin of tolerance<div class="body spacer-top-30" id="body" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; color: black; font-family: "Chronicle SSm A", "Chronicle SSm B", serif !important; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 1.7; margin: 30px 0px 0px; orphans: 2; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: start; text-decoration-color: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: normal; widows: 2; width: auto; word-spacing: 0px;">
<div class="intro" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; font-family: "Chronicle SSm A", "Chronicle SSm B", serif !important; font-size: 1rem; font-style: italic; font-weight: 400; line-height: 1.7; margin: 0px 0px 25px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
This article originally appeared in the February 2, 1959, issue of <span class="citation" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; font-family: "chronicle ssm a" , "chronicle ssm b" , serif "important"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Christianity Today</span>. It's written by Billy Graham.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpHLq-N4VlrtZTBgkzvx4O3vDzRCaJFBG-MmVvCZHucAU3cxSlYDiksejj3MOWf_pfOkzFr9qGqTN_O4L3NsfpODckIa26Sxaf9hQRJsN-0GoAg1SfPCNG04l4WOtlZ2_tdHTu/s1600/bg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="380" data-original-width="482" height="252" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpHLq-N4VlrtZTBgkzvx4O3vDzRCaJFBG-MmVvCZHucAU3cxSlYDiksejj3MOWf_pfOkzFr9qGqTN_O4L3NsfpODckIa26Sxaf9hQRJsN-0GoAg1SfPCNG04l4WOtlZ2_tdHTu/s320/bg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="text" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; font-family: "Chronicle SSm A", "Chronicle SSm B", serif !important; font-size: 16px; font-weight: 400; line-height: 1.7; margin: 0px 0px 25px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<i style="background: transparent; border: 0px; font-family: "Chronicle SSm A", "Chronicle SSm B", serif !important; font-size: 16px; font-style: italic; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Billy Graham's ministry to the big cities, widened in its outreach by radio and television, is one of the outstanding contributions to the resurgence of evangelical Christianity in our generation. His radio message on "The Sin of Tolerance" has been especially blessed. Reprints are available from the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association in Minneapolis</i>.</div>
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One of the pet words of this age is "tolerance." It is a good word, but we have tried to stretch it over too great an area of life. We have applied it too often where it does not belong. The word "tolerant" means "liberal," "broad-minded," "willing to put up with beliefs opposed to one's convictions," and "the allowance of something not wholly approved."</div>
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Tolerance, in one sense, implies the compromise of one's convictions, a yielding of ground upon important issues. Hence, over-tolerance in moral issues has made us soft, flabby and devoid of conviction.</div>
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We have become tolerant about divorce; we have become tolerant about the use of alcohol; we have become tolerant about delinquency; we have become tolerant about wickedness in high places; we have become tolerant about immorality; we have become tolerant about crime and we have become tolerant about godlessness. We have become tolerant of unbelief.</div>
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In a book recently published on what prominent people believe, 60 out of 100 did not even mention God, and only 11 out of 100 mentioned Jesus. There was a manifest tolerance toward soft character and a broadmindedness about morals, characteristic of our day. We have been sapped of conviction, drained of our beliefs and bereft of our faith.</div>
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The Way Is Narrow</h5>
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The sciences, however, call for narrow-mindedness. There is no room for broad-mindedness in the laboratory. Water boils at 212 degrees Fahrenheit at sea level. It is never 100 degrees nor 189 degrees—but always 212. Water freezes at 32 degrees—not at 23 or 31.</div>
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Objects heavier than air are always attracted to the center of the earth. They always go down—never up. I know this is very narrow, but the law of gravity decrees it so, and science is narrow.</div>
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Take mathematics. The sum of two plus two is four—not three-and-a-half. That seems very narrow, but arithmetic is not broad. Neither is geometry. It says that a straight line is the shortest distance between two points. That seems very dogmatic and narrow, but geometry is intolerant.</div>
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A compass will always point to the magnetic north. It seems that is a very narrow view, but a compass is not very "broad-minded." If it were, all the ships at sea, and all the planes in the air would be in danger.</div>
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If you should ask a man the direction to New York City and he said, "Oh, just take any road you wish, they all lead there," you would question either his sanity or his truthfulness. Somehow, we have gotten it into our minds that "all roads lead to heaven." You hear people say, "Do your best," "Be honest," and "Be sincere—and you will make it to heaven all right."</div>
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But Jesus Christ, who journeyed from heaven to earth and back to heaven again—who knew the way better than any man who ever lived—said, "Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it" (Matt. 7:13,14).</div>
<div class="text" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; font-family: "Chronicle SSm A", "Chronicle SSm B", serif !important; font-size: 16px; font-weight: 400; line-height: 1.7; margin: 0px 0px 25px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
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He plainly pointed out that there are two roads in life. One is broad—lacking in faith, convictions, and morals. It is the easy, popular, careless way. It is the way of the crowd, the way of the majority, the way of the world. He said, "Many there be that go in thereat." But he pointed out that this road, easy though it is, popular though it may be, heavily traveled though it is, leads to destruction. And in loving, compassionate intolerance he says, "Enter ye in at the strait gate … because strait is the gate and narrow is the way which leadeth unto life."</div>
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Our Lord's Intolerance</h5>
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His was the intolerance of a pilot who maneuvers his plane through the storm, realizing that a single error, just one flash of broad-mindedness, might bring disaster to all those passengers on the plane.</div>
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Once while flying from Korea to Japan, we ran through a rough snowstorm; and when we arrived over the airport in Tokyo, the ceiling and visibility were almost zero. The pilot had to make an instrument landing. I sat up in the cockpit with the pilot and watched him sweat it out as he was brought in by ground control approach. A man in the tower at the airport talked us in. I did not want these men to be broad-minded, but narrow-minded. I knew that our lives depended on it. Just so, when we come in for the landing in the great airport in heaven, I don't want any broad-mindedness. I want to come in on the beam, and even though I may be considered narrow here, I want to be sure of a safe landing there.</div>
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Christ was so intolerant of man's lost estate that he left his lofty throne in the heavenlies, took on himself the form of man, suffered at the hands of evil men and died on a cross to purchase our redemption. So serious was man's plight that he could not look upon it lightly. With the love that was his, he could not be broadminded about a world held captive by its lusts, its appetites and its sins.</div>
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Having paid such a price, he could not be tolerant about man's indifference toward him and the redemption he had wrought. He said, "He that is not with me is against me" (Matt. 12:30). He also said, "He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life, and he that believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the wrath of God abideth on him" (John 3:36).</div>
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He spoke of two roads, two kingdoms, two masters, two rewards, and two eternities. And he said, "Ye cannot serve God and mammon" (Matt. 6:24). We have the power to choose whom we will serve, but the alternative to choosing Christ brings certain destruction. Christ said that! The broad, wide, easy, popular way leads to death and destruction. Only the way of the Cross leads home.</div>
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Playing Both Sides</h5>
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The popular, tolerant attitude toward the gospel of Christ is like a man going to watch the Braves and the Dodgers play a baseball game and rooting for both sides. It would be impossible for a man who has no loyalty to a particular team to really get into the game.</div>
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Baseball fans are very intolerant in both Milwaukee and Los Angeles. If you would cheer for both sides in Los Angeles or Milwaukee, someone would yell, "Hey, make up your mind who you're for."</div>
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Christ said, "Ye cannot serve God and mammon … no man can serve two masters" (Matt. 6:24). One of the sins of this age is the sin of broad-mindedness. We need more people who will step out and say unashamedly, "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord" (Josh. 24:15).</div>
<div class="text" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; font-family: "Chronicle SSm A", "Chronicle SSm B", serif !important; font-size: 16px; font-weight: 400; line-height: 1.7; margin: 0px 0px 25px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
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He pronounced more "woes" on the Pharisees than on any other sect because they were given to outward piety but inward sham. "Woe unto you, Scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!" He said, "for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within ye are full of extortion and excess" (Matt. 23:25).</div>
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The church is a stage where all the performers are professors, but where too few of the professors are performers. A counterfeit Christian, singlehandedly, can do more to retard the progress of the church than a dozen saints can do to forward it. That is why Jesus was so intolerant with sham!</div>
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Sham's only reward is everlasting destruction. It is the only sin which has no reward in this life. Robbers have their loot; murderers their revenge; drunkards their stimulation; but the hypocrite has nothing but the contempt of his neighbors and the judgment of God hereafter. That is why Jesus said, "Be not as the hypocrites" (Matt. 6:16).</div>
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He said, "If any man will come after me, let him deny himself" (Luke 9:23). Self-centeredness is the basic cause of much of our distress in life. Hypochondria, a mental disorder which is accompanied by melancholy and depression, is often caused by self-pity and self-centeredness.</div>
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Most of us suffer from spiritual near-sightedness. Our interests, our loves, and our energies are too often focused upon ourselves.</div>
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Jesus was intolerant of selfishness. He underscored the fact that his disciples were to live outflowingly rather than selfishly. To the rich young ruler he said, "If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven …" (Matt. 19:21). It wasn't the giving of his goods that Jesus demanded, particularly-but his release from selfishness and its devastating effect on his personality and life.</div>
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He was intolerant of selfishness when he said, "For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it" (Matt. 16:25). The "life" which Jesus urges us to lose is the selfishness that lives within us, the old nature of sin that is in conflict with God. Peter, James and John left their nets, but Jesus did not object to nets as such—it was the selfish living they symbolized that he wanted them to forsake. Matthew left the "custom seat," a political job, to follow Christ. But Jesus did not object to a political career as such—it was the selfish quality of living which it represented that he wanted Matthew to forsake.</div>
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So, in your life and mine, "self" must be crucified and Christ enthroned. He was intolerant of any other way, for he knew that selfishness and the Spirit of God cannot exist together.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhskZ0hkpT3NF_cNh-MVs6bkq4k3_vT4vO0yMoKp2txVRmWd2qFXOFNjcbi2CyYh0Gwizn0l10HKHG5ly2wv1aHCzwEtyivanykK4cIwpRNQapkDuYwBvaXMutIzwyG4JVsgIKD/s1600/bg3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="585" data-original-width="800" height="234" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhskZ0hkpT3NF_cNh-MVs6bkq4k3_vT4vO0yMoKp2txVRmWd2qFXOFNjcbi2CyYh0Gwizn0l10HKHG5ly2wv1aHCzwEtyivanykK4cIwpRNQapkDuYwBvaXMutIzwyG4JVsgIKD/s320/bg3.jpg" width="320" /></a>He was tolerant toward the sinner but intolerant toward the evil which enslaved him. To the adulteress he said, "Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more" (John 8:11). He forgave her because he loved her; but he condemned sin because he loathed it with a holy hatred.</div>
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God has always been intolerant of sin! His Word says: "Wash you, make you clean; put away the evil of your doings from before mine eyes; cease to do evil" (Isa. 1:16). "Awake to righteousness, and sin not" (1 Cor. 15:34). "Let the wicked forsake his way and the unrighteous man his thoughts …" (Isa. 55:7).</div>
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Christ was "so intolerant of sin that he died on the cross to free men from its power. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life" (John 3:16). Sin lies at the root of society's difficulties today. Whatever separates man from God disunites man from man. The world problem will never be solved until the question of sin is settled.</div>
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But the Cross is God's answer to sin. To all who will receive the blessed news of salvation through Christ, it forever crosses out and cancels sin's power. Forest rangers know well the value of the "burn-back" in fighting forest fires. To save an area from being burned, they simply burn away all of the trees and shrubs to a safe distance; and when the fire reaches that burned-out spot, those standing there are safe from the flames. Fire is thus fought by fire.</div>
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Calvary was a colossal fighting of fire by fire. Christ, taking on himself all of our sins, allowed the fire of sin's judgment to fall upon him. The area around the Cross has become a place of refuge for all who would escape the judgment of sin. Take your place with him at the Cross; stand by the Cross; yield your life to him who redeemed you on the Cross, and the fire of sin's judgment can never touch you.</div>
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God is intolerant of sin. That intolerance sent his Son to die for us. He has said "that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish." The clear implication is that those who refuse to believe in Christ shall be eternally lost. Come to him today, while his Spirit deals with your heart!</div>
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tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-27626404849609768642018-02-21T01:02:00.003-05:002018-02-21T01:03:17.926-05:00hindsight<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Recently I was asked to put together some information about Connection Church - an amazing congregation I was the Lead Pastor of for ten years.<br />
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I've never taken the time to do this, and it honestly felt a bit weird. But... it also felt amazing.<br />
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I'm putting this here just to put it out there. To God be the Glory... and to people be the story.<br />
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In 2007: (the Recession hit us hard, so we hit back hard)<br />
- We led at least 15 people to Jesus<br />
- We collected blankets to pass out to the homeless in Cleveland ("Shirt Off Your Back")<br />
- We raised money to take care of 25 kids in Africa for a whole year (school, food, church)<br />
- We began networking other local churches together<br />
- We took part in ministry to the local jail, bringing Bibles to all the prisoners<br />
- We did a food drive for a local ministry<br />
- We did a book drive for a city literacy agency<br />
- We co-hosted the renewal of wedding vows through a partnership we helped forge called the Medina Marriage Coalition<br />
- We ran a concession stand at Reagan Park baseball fields<br />
- We hosted a Back To School Fest for the whole community at Regal Cinemas, helping 24 area kids with bags of school supplies<br />
- We held our first VBS co-hosted with another church<br />
- We held a 24 hour prayer vigil<br />
- We moved out of a movie theater and into Warehouse space<br />
- We made Christmas better locally for 14 kids / 5 families through Adopt A Family<br />
- We made Christmas better globally through Advent for Orphans (providing a full year of care for an orphan and resources for the house he/she lives in)<br />
- We did “Operation Christmas Child” (shoe boxes of gifts for kids in Third World countries)<br />
- We were in the newspaper 6 times<br />
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In 2008: <br />
- We led at least 25 people to Jesus.<br />
- We relocated to our second building, leaving the Warehouse for larger space down the street<br />
- We hosted Learning Communities at local restaurants (Panera, Donatos) and the library to invite people to study with us<br />
- We had live animals in our new building on Christmas Eve and gave out cash to our attendees so they could use it to be a blessing to others. In doing so, we made the front page of the Cleveland Plain Dealer (and two other notable papers locally). <br />
- We renovated a returning soldier’s home, and again the news thought we were up to something good. <br />
- We threw a “land cruise” in a neighborhood for a church member who had cancer… we turned a cul-de-sac into multiple ports with ethnic food and more. <br />
- We established our network to invest into local networks and global ministry: The first 10% that we received financially would now be sent right back out to be a blessing to other ministries. This included endeavors that work with unwed mothers in crisis, or local teens in need of a connection, or marriage initiatives across church lines. <br />
- We began partnering with Gospel Harvest Ministries so they could build a church structure and feed its people during a hard famine… one they are still in. <br />
- We did “Grow & Go” all summer - after taking part in a regular Sunday service, we then went out on a different serving project each week to bless people with random acts of kindness.<br />
- We started a monthly food pantry ministry called Connection Cupboard,<br />
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In 2009:<br />
- We led at least 15 people to Jesus<br />
- We grew our Lead Team to seven members<br />
- We officially paid down $60,000 in debt from the church's first/launch year<br />
- We again were on the front page of the Cleveland Plain Dealer on Christmas for our services and giving away money on Christmas Eve<br />
- We initiated local support and awareness we’re raising for Haiti<br />
- We fed over 40 families through Connection Cupboard Food Pantry<br />
- We hosted a massive VBS that drew in kids from all over, filling our building<br />
- We helped Gospel Harvest Ministries in Kenya grow its financial sponsorship and ministry to reach even more orphans (28)<br />
- We co-hosted Good Friday services with Heartland Church at our building.<br />
<br />
In 2010:<br />
- We led at least 16 people to Jesus.<br />
- We expanded our concession stand ministry to include special events and multiple people serving to have better connections in the community.<br />
- We began putting a Jesus-centered weekly article in the Medina Gazette that reached 13,000 people weekly.<br />
- We fed over 60 families through Connection Cupboard food pantry.<br />
- We set aside the first Monday of every month as a day set aside for pray – a 24 hour prayer vigil people signed up for various hours with God for.<br />
- We became a church with a 7-Day facility – which means that when we weren’t using our building, someone else was for free… be it a business group or a local Girl Scout troop.<br />
- We had a young adult from our church become our first global missionary.<br />
- We discovered more dedicated leaders emerging within Connection Church. Our monthly large “Leaders Connection” meeting of volunteer leaders grew from 10 to 25.<br />
- We created a lead team position over “Next Gen” ministries! This allowed for ministry directors who spiritually invested into Tweens, Jr Teens, and High School Teens.<br />
- Men’s Connection and Women’s Connection formed into their own unique movements, between weekly Bible studies and monthly food/events.<br />
- For the first time ever, we had two services in the summer and three services in December.<br />
- We “unsuccessfully successfully” read the Bible. Many of us set a goal to read the whole Bible, yet only a few people did (one of them did it in 90 days). The rest of us “failed,” but we praised God for it – for while we didn’t finish the goal of reading the whole thing, we did read it more than ever before.<br />
- We co-hosted Good Friday services with Heartland Church at our building.<br />
- We helped Gospel Harvest Ministries in Kenya grow its financial sponsorship and ministry to reach even more orphans (46)<br />
- We finally hit budget as a church! It’s the first time ever – we brought in $190,865 internally, $6,484 externally, and $12,816 through fundraising; we paid out $3,086 to Birthcare of Medina (supports new moms in need), $3,086 to Cup’s Café (feeds area kids and adults for free), $3,086 to Westedge Church (Cleveland ministry to the under-resourced), $5,347 to The Reckoning (micro-financing ministry projects and loans all around the world), and $11,778 to Gospel Harvest Ministries (church and orphan care in Africa).<br />
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In 2011:<br />
- We were asked to expand our weekly newspaper ministry to reach 63,000 people. Multiple people began emailing us about how they were being impacted from it. There is no way to gauge the specific number of people who came to know Jesus better through this, but the effect was all over.<br />
- We hosted Back To School Fest at Liberty Plaza. Over 40 kids received backpacks and school supplies, not to mention the new partnership we’ve formed for continued ministry and relationships.<br />
- Once a month we fed and connected with the under-resourced in Cleveland, including bringing over 45 shoeboxes full of gifts at Christmas time.<br />
- We sacrificed a week of regular eating to consume nothing but rice and beans. The money we saved we sent to Africa, helping them finish a floor that has allowed a ministry there to care for more orphans and raise them up in the faith. Multiple new outlets covered this, including USA Today<br />
- We collected shirts, coats, blankets and more for the Cleveland homeless and ended up with so many donations that we ran out of vehicles/people who could dispense it.<br />
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In 2012:<br />
- We led at least 12 people to Jesus.<br />
- We experienced a bitterweet tipping point - sweet, in that we restructured the church into three teams of people (Core Team, Resource Team, Lead Team) yet bitter in that it was when a divisive family created massive contention. Most of our energy went into putting out fires and our new building campaign. In response, though...<br />
- We started The Big Day of Serving. Working with Mayor Hanwell and five other churches, we brought 400 volunteers to Medina to do community service projects.<br />
- We started a Saturday night service to reach new people. It brought in multiple young adults but our team couldn't sustain it past 9 months without feeling wearied.<br />
- We began a "replant" effort in the fall of 2012 where I visited the homes of people in Connection and listened to whatever they wanted to share. It went further than I expected, even creating additional conversations into this summer. Ultimately, it allowed us to form values that weren't something I came up with on my own but ones that everyone had a "voice" into. That led to more hands on deck to put God first in all things and pursue the people He wants us to reach. <br />
- Making Space (our building campaign) allowed us to expand 30,000 feet debt free, This opened up new classrooms for the kids on Easter Weekend and made space in our “Big Room” before Christmas.<br />
- VBS again set records. One of our best at reaching kids/families.<br />
<br />
I can write more about 2013-2017, but need to do that later. <a href="http://www.christianitytoday.com/pastors/2017/august-web-exclusives/confessions-of-former-it-church-pastor.html" target="_blank">Maybe I already did</a>. <br />
<br />
In hindsight, we were quite nimble and audacious in our early years. When we got into our building, we had breakthroughs but also new responsibilities. It put us into a budget that quickly became an ongoing topic. That said, we did reach a ton of people along the way, helped some amazing people become lifelong friends and forged an identity as a genuine, "go to" church in the community.<br />
<br />
I wish I knew then what I know now, but I only know what I know now by being who I was then. :)tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-15359195571301337502017-11-07T04:18:00.001-05:002017-11-07T04:18:13.475-05:00the thing about giving<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
<b>Did you by chance take part in the “family business?” </b><br />
<br />
In my case, the family business was combination of a private detective agency and a security company that was based out of our home. During elementary school I regularly answered phones, worked security shifts with my parents and traveled all over the country as my dad was called to follow someone to take pictures of them cheating on their spouse. Kind of makes for an interesting way to grow up, doesn’t it?
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<br />
All throughout this experience a number of characters somehow found their way into working for my dad. From the 8-foot tall whiner named “Ed” to the often lazy “Jerry,” every employee had a distinctiveness that separated them from among the rest. It’s no wonder we didn’t really promote our company Christmas party to the masses - we’d need some security of our own!
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<br />
One of these unique individuals was named “Oscar.” One of Oscar’s unique characteristics, if this can be considered. is the fact that he didn’t have much. He came from a humble area near Chicago where he and his family lived. As he worked for our company for a short while, I noticed my parents were quite generous in helping him with money, food, and other household “essentials” that he and his family were lacking in. And on every occasion, Oscar simply said (in his usual deep, raspy voice), “Thank you.”
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<br />
Being a part of the family business, I didn’t want a chance to miss out on the family generosity. So without any prodding, I gathered up many of my favorite toys and gave them to Oscar to give to his kids. And as always, Oscar gave me his famous “Thank you.” And that was it - end of story.
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Honestly, I was let down. I mean, come on - these were not just any toys but my Star Wars toys! I had spent months collecting these little plastic men and all I got out of it was a mere “Thank you?” Something didn’t seem right. I mean... <i>surely</i> I had missed the letter from Oscar’s kids that told me how much I was the greatest kid in the world for parting with such processed treasure.
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<br />
Looking back on it all, I think this was a good lesson for me in something Jesus said:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: #660000;"><b><i>But when you give to the poor and do acts of kindness, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing [give in complete secrecy], so that your charitable acts will be done in secret; and your Father who sees [what is done] in secret will reward you. (Matthew 6:3-4)</i></b></span> </blockquote>
Generosity involves giving up something you normally hold as a part of your life for something greater - a blessing to someone else, or a clearer connection to the greatest Giver of all. Like the lesson I learned during my younger days, sometimes you don’t get much more out of generosity than the affirmation that you did what was right and that should be enough.
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<br />
Because we do not measure holiness by what we do but by who we are becoming.<br />
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Jesus warned us to be sure that when we make an offering, be it to God or to others, that we should not have a hidden agenda. Obedience in itself should be our reward, not because of external recognition but because of internal submission to Christ. And like Oscar, sometimes all God says is, “Thank You.”<br />
<br />
Perhaps that should be enough - a thank you from God. You think?
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-17593498284491055762017-07-02T23:44:00.000-04:002017-07-02T23:44:02.902-04:00strumming along<span style="font-size: large;"><b>We all face the "bummer" side of life and people.</b></span><br />
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Today I realized that someone stole my guitar.<br />
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Keep in mind, I'm not a traveling musician - rather, this is more of a personal item that I've used over the years to write songs on or play in our church's worship band. It's given me something to tinker on around a campfire. Quite a few "silly songs" were belted out on it. Someone famous (I won't name drop) once used it when I loaned it to him on the fly. I've pulled it out on my kids' birthdays to sing the individual songs I composed for each of them as a biblical "blessing" when they were born.<br />
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<br />
A couple weeks ago, someone busted into our church building when no one was around. We had to replace the handle, but other than that we assumed that nothing was missing. It turns out that the one item that was taken was my guitar. I've from time to time kept it at the church building in case someone needed to borrow it or if I felt led to share something on it. This weekend I realized I hadn't seen it and discerned that this is likely what happened after the break-in.<br />
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So why am I sharing this?<br />
<br />
Not sure. I know that social media is a place where we sometimes say things out loud that we'd otherwise say under our breath. It's where we might offer others a glimpse into our greatest joys or our greatest hurts. Sometimes it gets ugly, whether we're ranting about politics or pretending we're mob bosses who put a "hit" out on a local business or school official who wronged us, saying, "They bothered me. Now I declare a verbal war on them so that everyone knows what horrible people they are!"<br />
<br />
I thought maybe I'd walk you through the ugly moments and beautiful moments of how all of this has played out inside of me.
This morning I realized that my guitar had been stolen... and the awareness came to me just moments before I needed to engage as a pastor today and preach a message on my heart. But now I had a sliver of something else floating around inside of me - a frustration, perhaps, toward the mysterious person who took something that symbolizes so much to me. An item I'd hoped to pass down to my kids ones day or perhaps sing a song on to my future grand-kids. Who knows?<br />
<br />
And yet... I don't know... something else was popping around inside of me, too. It was a beyond-me compassion and grace for this individual. I didn't have a reason for it, nor did I feel a religious guilt about *having* to forgive. Rather, I felt I'd already forgiven this person. I started to imagine that maybe someone homeless busted into our building and took the only thing he or she could carry on foot. And then I imagined that maybe my guitar for them will be something they sit down and use on the street as a way to beg for money for food. ("Or beer, probably" the cynic in me tried to argue. "Or food, too," the other Voice offered.)
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Yeah, I was having a conversation. This might be hard to understand, but sometimes I have these chats with the Lord without realizing I'm having them. It's like I "discover" He's been telling me something before I understood the dialogue.
In any event, I'm posting this because I was grateful for all the times I've spent with God before this moment because it prepared me for it. Rather than giving into my human bent to be angry, I was at rest in the Holy Spirit. I found myself strangely comforted by how "not disturbed" I was.<br />
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What a gift. What a Giver.<br />
<br />
Perhaps someone will wrong you this week (or already has). Maybe another flawed human being (just like you) will let you down or make you feel betrayed.<br />
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<b>We all face the "bummer" side of life and people.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>But what if we could also all face the "Jesus" side of life and people?</b><br />
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Perhaps whomever wrongs you next doesn't have to receive the worst of you as you respond to the "worst" in them (note the quotes - it may not be as bad as you think). What if the time you spend with Jesus today will prepare you for that moment as it happens?
This is why I love being a regular part of a church... it gives me a rhythm of gathering every week with other ragtag people who agree that God is much smarter than we are and maybe we can get through life better with Him and His wisdom. It's why I dig into His words each day and try to put Him first in all things. And when I get it wrong, I circle back and reset to get it right.<br />
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I don't know... maybe this is just me sharing out loud how I'm a real guy on a real journey with a real God.<br />
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Or maybe this is an invitation for you to get in on that journey, too. What do you say?<br />
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-79904560133288899172016-12-03T00:52:00.003-05:002017-06-30T22:19:59.318-04:0013<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b>My love for this kid... no words remotely come close.
</b><br />
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He's the real deal, and he turned 13 today. The rest of the family and I thoroughly enjoyed investing into him.
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But let me tell you... beyond the presents we gave him, we're thankful for the gift he is. Jesus is at work in his heart and through his life. That means this young man, flaws and all, is in a much more rooted place as he starts his teenage journey than I was at his age. I know that in itself is by the grace of God, so... thank you, God.
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Beyond the normal day-to-day with my son, he and I have spent the past several months working on a big project together. That means I've been that much closer to his thoughts and his character. I gotta tell ya - this world is a much better world with him in it.
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Once again... thank you, God. Please lead us as we try to fan the flame you've put in my son that's already warmed our hearts.<br />
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<i>Daniel, I love you! You are a world changer with the most generous heart. I pray that you never doubt how special you are to me and your entire family. Do not let anyone look down on your because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity... and when you fall short (as I do, daily) know that the love of your Father is even greater than the love of your father... His grace is enough!</i> tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-86236654339544231982016-04-21T22:24:00.001-04:002016-04-21T23:04:18.490-04:00the man in the mirror<span style="color: #ffffc0;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>One day, we wake up and realize we’re not children anymore.</b></span></span>
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<span style="color: #ffffc0;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Another day, we wake up and realize our children aren’t children anymore </b></span></span>
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<i><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">(Ouch! Yeah, this is going to be one of those posts. Sorry – we gotta go there.)</span></span></i><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"> </span></span>
<br />
<b>The year my oldest son was born, my wife and I bought a journal.</b><br />
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It was intended to be something we’d write in each year on his birthday to sum up what we’d seen in him over that previous year. I remember the day we picked it out. I wanted this to be meaningful from the very start.<br />
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That’s when I saw a picture on the cover of one journal. It was a piece of art called “Always” by <a href="http://www.christcenteredmall.com/stores/art/dicianni/always.htm" target="_blank">Ron Dicianni</a>, and it moved me.<br />
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I was the man in the mirror, holding my baby boy. The man in front of the mirror was a long, long way off.<br />
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Or so I thought.<br />
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I still remember writing the first entry. I wanted to write something funny that would perhaps lead into something meaningful. (Apparently, some things never change.)<br />
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As context, the birthday journal idea went well for a long number of years. Unfortunately, my wife and I ended up getting caught up in the busyness of life. We actually haven’t written in it for four years. While I can justify it in saying that’s just how things go, I knew I had to pick it up again.<br />
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<b>That’s when it hit me… the cover had changed.</b><br />
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More specifically, my placement in it with my son had changed.<br />
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It shredded me. I had to actually set it down.<br />
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Because the reason I’d picked it up was because earlier that night I found myself in front of a mirror again. This time, I was teaching that very same son how to shave.<b> </b><br />
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<b>And this time, there were two men in the mirror.</b><br />
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<i>(I told you I was going there. Please grab a Kleenex for me, too.)</i><br />
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Our kids growing up is by no means a bad thing. It means they’re preparing to own who God made them to be and the unique difference they can make in the world. While this same young man with shaving cream on his face still (literally) has a Peter Pan hat in his bedroom, he also started his first job the “day-after-the-shave.”<br />
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<i>(That’s what I’m calling it, by the way. I may need therapy soon.)</i><br />
<br />
Holding our kids firmly when they’re little is needed, but as they get older we need to hold them with an open hand. If we can do this well, we’ll still get a firm embrace from time to time that reminds us of when they were more handheld.<br />
<br />
So at this stage of things, there are a few things my wife and I are trying to do to help our oldest emerge into adulthood. Maybe we can all do these in our attempt to be unconditional:<br />
<ul>
<li><b>Pray with them. </b>While it may be easier to just pray for them, we want to pray with our older kids. Even if they go through the stage of pushing back on faith, they need something consistent here. As life hands them a “trampoline” and says everything has now become flexible, they need this “foundation” for the trampoline to be set on.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZ2Y_LIFgTNXeCl3OrjYip6D6GJXfRpzoIOgS11MoEryh3b1cBRPdFdgaCcdDTBK4tX3SD0QhnhOfbSNrwU_DcOLVVmQ4xAzyzzu6BxQVtIXNcCMLXcyFKEc76DhizZi1o5Ttn/s1600/firstday.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZ2Y_LIFgTNXeCl3OrjYip6D6GJXfRpzoIOgS11MoEryh3b1cBRPdFdgaCcdDTBK4tX3SD0QhnhOfbSNrwU_DcOLVVmQ4xAzyzzu6BxQVtIXNcCMLXcyFKEc76DhizZi1o5Ttn/s200/firstday.jpg" width="200" /></a>
<li><b>Partner with others. </b>We can’t be everywhere our older kids are, but we can partner with others who are. Our son’s first job is actually under an amazing Christian man who runs a hot dog restaurant locally. We talked about how cleaning plates in the kitchen is a “dish position that will impact his disposition.” Our owner even came over to pray with us at our meal when we ate there that night. That can be rare, but maybe it doesn’t need to be. Think of who else “gets it” and can help your son or daughter “get it,” too.</li>
<li><b>Prod with opportunities.</b> While it may be impossible to return our older kids back to the innocence of their younger days, we can choose how to expose them to the world. My wife and I do our best to walk our kids through big headlines as they happen so they can get a mature understanding of the issue versus just hearing a sound-byte on it. We also decided when each of our kids was 13-years old to take them on a mission trip. My oldest and I went two years ago, and we’ll be back there again with his younger brother who is turning 13 this year.</li>
</ul>
<br />
<i>Wait…</i><br />
<br />
<i>I just realized that I’m going to through all of this <span style="text-decoration: underline;">again</span> with my emerging 13-year old!</i><br />
<br />
<i>Forget a piece of Kleenex. Please pass me the whole box!</i><br />
<br />
<b>Can you relate?</b><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b><i><span style="color: yellow;">Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4) </span></i></b></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-74614519550296531552016-02-17T15:27:00.001-05:002016-02-17T15:27:11.316-05:00thinking out loud<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_ttTuCBIteC7vj-Baw5R51I99jEbh2dK2AGfFO6ElVYrPuOPFeexGUZpvXAmQf1jQxQx9Dg4Yw_uCgT2LPFYTR81Oyennzn8nvtGY-b97d_ouMNXTjGlyRJei6SWB59HG2igT/s1600/thinking.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_ttTuCBIteC7vj-Baw5R51I99jEbh2dK2AGfFO6ElVYrPuOPFeexGUZpvXAmQf1jQxQx9Dg4Yw_uCgT2LPFYTR81Oyennzn8nvtGY-b97d_ouMNXTjGlyRJei6SWB59HG2igT/s320/thinking.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Perhaps I merely need space to do some thinking out loud.<br />
<br />
Maybe this blog feels like it's where I've best figured this out before.<br />
<br />
Here's what I know and wonder about, either way:<br />
<ul>
<li><b>Knowing how to do something doesn't mean you're the person to do it: </b>I see this all the time in my parenting as I watch my kids take ownership of something in an hour that I could do in five minutes. Maturity doesn't always equal doing things in a mature way, but investing into immature or underdeveloped people so they can step up. The future depends on me doing this in the present.</li>
<li><b>What you do doesn't define who you are: </b>In some ways, our actions do validate who we really are on the inside - but we need to pay more attention to the inner workings of our life than our actions. When you are fatigued or can't seem to make your life produce what you want, that's when what's going on in your soul can kick in to guide and sustain you. It will also be where God speaks so that you know if you are hanging on for the right reasons or merely clinging to what you know out of insecurity. <b> </b></li>
<li><b>God's Story plays out in chapters: </b>Sometimes we are in multiple chapters of one tale, and other times we merely make a cameo appearance. You can give a quarter (or more) of your life to something and it still only be a part of the Story God has for you. Don't get hung up on how much or how little your name appears on certain pages - let the Author writer what He wants, for He knows the best way to avoid watering down the Plot.</li>
</ul>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5lD4dFzI-lQWAVP8G_B7s6Atwp2KxO04naFgYLIp7RGSCNjnOgGNFS6wYFXm02TMl_-2wmdngoVitEEzwxl_x6CTjK5ihQj6_-OqCHXycF_Ne1SUQNd9ur8JUJC-7Oa_20dFa/s1600/hill.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5lD4dFzI-lQWAVP8G_B7s6Atwp2KxO04naFgYLIp7RGSCNjnOgGNFS6wYFXm02TMl_-2wmdngoVitEEzwxl_x6CTjK5ihQj6_-OqCHXycF_Ne1SUQNd9ur8JUJC-7Oa_20dFa/s1600/hill.jpg" /></a></div>
I can think of no more appropriate analogy than what this means today than watching my 5-year old daughter go down a sledding hill for the first time yesterday. She first went down with my wife and I a turn, and then asked, "Can I do it myself?"<br />
<br />
Isn't that the most appropriate question of a 5-year old?<br />
<br />
We reasoned that it was worth a gamble, but only if we went half-way up. The plan was for my wife and I to be at opposite ends - one to launch her, and the other to catch her.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Here's what happened... pay attention to my daughter's expression.</b><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe width="320" height="266" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OpOHsaMo7jM/0.jpg" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/OpOHsaMo7jM?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></div>
<br />
Maybe we're ready for the hill ahead... or maybe we're ready for half of it.<br />
<br />
Perhaps we're to launch others. Perhaps we're to catch them.<br />
<br />
<b>Either way, something tells me we're meant to be out on that hill.</b><br />
<br />
At least, that's what I'm just thinking out loud.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>"In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord directs their steps." (Proverbs 16:9)</b></i></span></blockquote>
<br />
<br />
<ul>
</ul>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-85446658243150135672016-02-01T03:29:00.000-05:002016-02-06T21:22:40.191-05:00politically homeless?<hr />
<span style="font-size: large;">Once upon a time...</span><br />
<br />
there was a rich, famous man who became political,<br />
<br />
who was known for regularly building huge structures,<br />
<br />
who barked at people regarding what he thought<br />
<br />
and who generally didn't care what they replied back to him.<br />
<br />
His name was Pharaoh.<br />
<br />
Pharaoh was popular among a certain segment of people who liked those things about him.<br />
<br />
Then again, there were other people who wished some sort of plague would swoop in and take him out of the spotlight. <br />
<br />
<hr />
<span style="font-size: large;">Once upon a time...</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;">there was a man who was a public servant known for slamming the wealthy.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />Some people nicknamed him Robin Hood.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;">Remember Robin Hood? He was either a villain or a hero, depending on who you spoke with.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;">Maybe he was both. </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;">Perhaps it was an appropriate nickname for many reasons, for by all means he was within the system yet outside of it; he had resources but didn't take resources. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;">In fact, at the end of the day he was sort of a hard guy to pin down.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;">Should he really be in power?</span><br />
<br />
<hr />
<span style="color: #d9ead3;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: #ffe599;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Hi, my name is Tony Myles and I am politically homeless.</b></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;">What I mean by that is I have no interest in living under the roof of a particular political party.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;">Can we still be friends? I ask because I can already hear some of you cracking your knuckles to reply. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;">I wrote the two anecdotes above not to stir up trouble but to make a point - every human leader is flawed and can be stereotyped away so we don't have to pay attention. To top it off, messing with someone's candidate is like messing with that person's family. I get that.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: small;">But... do you? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: small;">Do you get how they aren't your family, but you think they are?</span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTzKfPo3ZeATUPJxER6wsR6pq7p0BfjJevQDIFwJ93iJyfXMT8rbzduYfCIq-jq2N1gPbeQktfbZxQ5yhNTHig5UrlRFgOdktEcPbhgliLvbapNa-vTdwhcKn56AADx3m22fpc/s1600/Christian_Politics.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="91" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTzKfPo3ZeATUPJxER6wsR6pq7p0BfjJevQDIFwJ93iJyfXMT8rbzduYfCIq-jq2N1gPbeQktfbZxQ5yhNTHig5UrlRFgOdktEcPbhgliLvbapNa-vTdwhcKn56AADx3m22fpc/s200/Christian_Politics.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
I've spent multiple elections trying to help people lean into praying for wisdom in how they vote. Voting, after all, is a human idea that doesn't always reflect the truth and will of God. We have this belief that if many people say something must be a certain way that we have no choice but to agree.<br />
<br />
<b>Voting never has, nor never will, overpower the pure truth of God or His standards. </b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>What's common isn't Normal. What's Normal isn't common.</b></span><br />
<br />
Another hurdle is there are many people who aren't sure that they fall into one camp 100%, if even 10%. Rather than jumping into another round of <i>"WE'VE GOT SPIRIT, YES WE DO! WE'VE GOT SPIRIT, HOW 'BOUT YOU?"</i> they elect (pun intended) to not elect.<br />
<br />
I'm not sure that's entirely the best approach either. <br />
<br />
Here's what I believe about all of that, right or wrong:<br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-size: large;"><b>The issues matter more than the candidates:</b> </span>You'll likely never in my lifetime hear who "my candidate" or "my party" is. God is my leader in all things, and I believe what He cares about and proclaims transcends party lines. In fact, to be even clearer - what God cares about and proclaims transcends even my personal preferences or previous affiliations. If you or I are inclined to vote on something a certain way that conflicts with something He's made clear, then we are the ones who are to change - not Him.</li>
<li><b><span style="font-size: large;">The Gospel matters more than the parties:</span> </b>Jesus' teachings are highly political yet incredibly bi-partisan. As a follower of Christ and a Story-teller of His Story, I am called to do what I can where I can while realizing I can't do it all. No human platform, speech or rally cry - not even the snarkiest of Internet/meme graphics - can overshadow even the smallest punctuation marks of the Bible.</li>
<li><span style="font-size: large;"><b>The Church matters more than the government:</b> </span>Someone just got really angry reading that. Again, apologies... but not really. I can't use the title "God" without letting Him be God. Makes sense, right? He gets to be first in all things. His agenda matters more than anyone's agenda. He says everyone in the whole world matters and not just one country. He says we're to go all into the world to make this known because eternity is a bigger deal than the next four years. Granted, the next four years play into eternity, but the mission of the Church must always take precedence over the mission of government. They work hand-in-hand sometimes, and we can show our faith in how we treat our rulers, but again - they are different.</li>
<li><b><span style="font-size: large;">The faith matters more than the skills:</span> </b>While I know none of my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ are perfect, I have a sense that many of them are teachable. You have to be in order to follow God. I'd like to see that in a political candidate a bit more than mere skills. Meaning, I'd love to see an "all-in" follower of Jesus who nods His life before God every day than someone who speaks well and plays political games better than others. If we only vote for the lesser of two evils, we're still voting for a form of evil.</li>
</ul>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdQ4AeP5W0x8DD3eDqQSLJDkQbBj2FWzLM_VZeTezGpaYbgDQvURBL86fmBRgL7gWh4df3IliBcsPodPHhXJbnG1gT3aEdPeGekJekxSfNgxGPa9nsbFVyOyMzra2DJzxotV2b/s1600/churchstate.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="136" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdQ4AeP5W0x8DD3eDqQSLJDkQbBj2FWzLM_VZeTezGpaYbgDQvURBL86fmBRgL7gWh4df3IliBcsPodPHhXJbnG1gT3aEdPeGekJekxSfNgxGPa9nsbFVyOyMzra2DJzxotV2b/s200/churchstate.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<b>Why did I write all of this?</b><br />
<br />
<b>Why does any of this matter?</b><br />
<ol>
<li><span style="color: #ffe599;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>I have strangely angered people simply by talking about politics. </b></span></span>There are people in my life who constantly post about political topics, from the economy to sexuality; from health care to the poor. It's all worth talking about, because these are issues God does have perspective and guidance for us on. My hurdle is I sometimes find that if I even dip my toe into those waters I lose friends. Literally... I can think of five people right now who scaled back their friendship from me simply because I said, "You know, here's another way to think about this." For real.</li>
<li><b><span style="color: #ffe599;">People want to know what I believe.</span> </b>As a pastor I understand that this is not my role in their lives. While I will happily give people a framework of things to think about, I've found that promoting a party or a candidate is ridiculous. I'd rather introduce people to Jesus and let Him work inside of them and reshape how they handle the political piece of their lives. To top it off, there are legit Christians in both of the major parties - and following Jesus together is one thing we can agree on.<b> </b></li>
<li><span style="color: #ffe599;"><b>I see too many of my friends just recycling what they already think and labeling others who think differently.</b> </span>If you assume someone else is idiotic, stupid or anything in this realm for not thinking as you do then you're missing out on a key truth in the world - everyone generally is trying to do what they think is right, whether or not it actually is. If we can speak to one another personally versus with punchlines, perhaps we could form a real relationship that transcends the topics.</li>
</ol>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBCOCRc0HHCfJVcwGVnjbTr2DOojfi_zTROs1Uv0yYwLGCSyJZkiBQQOUXNa_detcYCnOusi0GRD3SWrRxm5nSHiw_zEwOzMzvZJnZEmDQpdiaYSMYkiCPYl1wiJusejTo1a-e/s1600/prayvote.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBCOCRc0HHCfJVcwGVnjbTr2DOojfi_zTROs1Uv0yYwLGCSyJZkiBQQOUXNa_detcYCnOusi0GRD3SWrRxm5nSHiw_zEwOzMzvZJnZEmDQpdiaYSMYkiCPYl1wiJusejTo1a-e/s200/prayvote.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
So...<br />
<br />
have you read all of this up until this point to simply see if you can I match up so you know what to write in the comments? <br />
<br />
I'd suggest instead we keep growing, praying and developing.<br />
<br />
The main way God wants to change the world is by changing people.<br />
<br />
Maybe we can be two of them?<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>"But the people refused to listen... 'No!' they said. 'We want a king over us.'" (1 Samuel 8:19)</b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-87982130812169039822016-01-16T19:22:00.002-05:002016-01-16T19:25:40.602-05:00sweetness<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW9suOP1L0ugUlG6wvxMrQeEc8kQt_uKrUFfqQXv-bIu6ipXlqrcc-FWf97_0lLStoQWlUktJuhtUqTrCLqTmbZCulCoTHOKCa2p4P9wWe63cAIn7m2hnMFuwS-GSni13VhBRl/s1600/starwars_walterpayton.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW9suOP1L0ugUlG6wvxMrQeEc8kQt_uKrUFfqQXv-bIu6ipXlqrcc-FWf97_0lLStoQWlUktJuhtUqTrCLqTmbZCulCoTHOKCa2p4P9wWe63cAIn7m2hnMFuwS-GSni13VhBRl/s200/starwars_walterpayton.jpg" width="144" /></a></div>
<b>As a kid...</b><br />
<br />
I passed on meeting football legend Walter Payton just to see Star Wars in the theater a second time.
<br />
<br />
<i>Walter Payton.
</i><br />
<br />
"Sweetness."
<br />
<br />
For real.
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGLL0Wm8b5lze0YsJJb0KXla8u1nBDB_g30g_WtuNkWmX53Dqz9j7BnbEToI7MiK-6vjhSbDdd5vRlStF5MQW3VxblJoaCBPQLRBWKMgox32slNM84cLDNfv7KmZ7L6AGIHOFB/s1600/pass.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGLL0Wm8b5lze0YsJJb0KXla8u1nBDB_g30g_WtuNkWmX53Dqz9j7BnbEToI7MiK-6vjhSbDdd5vRlStF5MQW3VxblJoaCBPQLRBWKMgox32slNM84cLDNfv7KmZ7L6AGIHOFB/s320/pass.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<b>Tonight...
</b><br />
<br />
my 12-year old son just passed seeing Star Wars in the theater a second time to hang with me and his 5-year old sister.
<br />
<br />
<i>His sister.
</i><br />
<br />
Sweetness.
<br />
<br />
For real.<br />
<br />
<blockquote>
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>"Anyone who loves their brother and sister lives in the light, and there is nothing in them to make them stumble." (1 John 2:10)</b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-11361774498057758352015-12-19T16:52:00.000-05:002016-10-20T04:32:26.408-04:00keeping our kids spoiler-free<span style="font-size: large;"><b>It's been said that R2D2 is the most vulgar movie character of all-time.
</b></span><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>After all, the director bleeped out every single word he said.
</b><br />
<br />
<i>(ahem...)</i>
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Recently I took my oldest son with me to see the first show on opening night of <i><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGbxmsDFVnE" target="_blank">Star Wars: The Force Awakens</a></i>. According to him, it was<b> "the best day ever."</b>
<br />
<br />
It's not the first time he's said this. We've had many experiences over the years that qualified as "the best day ever." Every time he's made this claim, there's been one common theme: they've all been something we've never done before, and he had no preconceived expectations.
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>I call them "spoiler-free" moments.</b></span>
<br />
<br />
Creating these moments isn't easy to accomplish when it comes to movies. These days just walking down the toy aisle at Wal-Mart will spoil a movie's plot through the merchandise alone, not to mention movie trailers and commercials.
<br />
<br />
But somehow we avoided all of that with <i>Star Wars.</i>
<br />
<br />
After an early dinner at a local Chinese buffet, we arrived at the theater two hours before showtime to get the best seats in the house and wait with the other fans.
<br />
<br />
Finally, the big moment arrived. The theater dimmed as one of the most famous opening lines of a movie emerged on the screen:
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
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<span style="color: green; font-size: large;"><b><i>"A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away..."</i></b></span>
<br />
<br />
A silent giddiness consumed the theater.
<br />
<br />
I leaned over to my son and whispered, <i>"Remember this moment."</i>
<br />
<br />
As the <i>Star Wars</i> logo filled the screen, he yelled out<i> <b>"WOO-HOO!"</b></i><b> </b>and soon the whole theater joined in. He leaned over to me and said,<i> "I started that!"</i><br />
<br />
From there, we were caught up in the epic story from start to finish.
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<br />
I could tell during our ride home how much he'd gotten out of the experience. I asked him, "How did it feel not knowing anything going in?"
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<br />
He replied, "It was so hard to avoid it all, but I'm so glad I did. I felt like I almost saw something in a magazine about it and I was mad because I didn't want to ruin the movie. I've had that happen before where I felt like there weren't any surprises going in, but this time it was different. Seriously, one of the best days of my life!"
<br />
<br />
The analogy was obvious, and I couldn't resist the opportunity for a lesson.
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieFLCilEig7K5u8WAMo3fmlHm9IoOkseA5BkGu2Vr7dp6UhlHS3WhkpZLhbVYFJn895D9S8A7jQ6nn7mXRwRaEZwxs7j61B0zFK3c_gTkT6SJydhSSnA1c8bLkSnmStpju7ntD/s1600/peeking.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="162" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieFLCilEig7K5u8WAMo3fmlHm9IoOkseA5BkGu2Vr7dp6UhlHS3WhkpZLhbVYFJn895D9S8A7jQ6nn7mXRwRaEZwxs7j61B0zFK3c_gTkT6SJydhSSnA1c8bLkSnmStpju7ntD/s200/peeking.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
"You know," I began, "a lot of things in life are going to be like that. A lot of people won't think twice about spoiling things that should be saved for the right moment. It could be something like sex before marriage or the way we trust the authority in our life. Tonight you experienced the joy of waiting and not ruining something ahead of time. Do you understand the parallels?"
<br />
<br />
He nodded. It got deep.
<br />
<br />
I'm certainly not an expert on this, but as I looked back on the night I thought of three things that help my son stay spoiler-free.
<br />
<h2>
Three Ways to Keep Our Kids "Spoiler-Free"</h2>
<ol>
<li><b>Age-appropriateness:</b> I remember wanting to take my son to see the last <i>Star Wars</i> movie that came out but he was four-years-old at the time and that film was darker in tone. Skipping that and waiting ten years so he could be the right age to experience <i>Star Wars</i> in the theater was worth it. Part of parenting is keeping our kids innocent of evil and darkness as long as possible. Though it can be tempting to think our kids "can handle it," we're invited by God to help them stay sensitive to sin, profanity, sex and violence.</li>
<li><b>Investing in what's honorable: </b>We had to budget for the tickets, concessions, and dinner for our event to happen, but it was worth the celebration. It gave me a chance to affirm my son's good habits with a fun night out. While not every great choice or habit needs fanfare, surprising our kids with unexpected celebrations or ceremonies is powerful. Saying "I'm inspired by how hard you've been working at school this year" or "The way you're generous with others really blesses so many people," accompanied by a special event, can really affirm good habits.</li>
<li><b>Living spoiler-free, too: </b>Our kids may <i>hear</i> our words, but they will <i>listen</i> to our lives. If we're not endorsing the values coming out of our mouths with the choices we make, then they won't believe in them anymore than we do. Just as God has in mind the kind of future adult your kid can become, he has something incredible for you, too. Consider (and perhaps write down) how he might want you to grow as you attempt to grow your kid.</li>
</ol>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7YnQ7ICP-s1OM4NlpWDk8iRYYKP2R6wDbabm8agk2MGut4jZ5-yBb3LO3MF71nXTb711nEFIxp_MurlFUUAMMycRXTzPmRL06Qu8ktAdS12BHOMDZjLKVCDyh9ci2u23TUNTy/s1600/John-Boyega-in-Star-Wars.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="103" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7YnQ7ICP-s1OM4NlpWDk8iRYYKP2R6wDbabm8agk2MGut4jZ5-yBb3LO3MF71nXTb711nEFIxp_MurlFUUAMMycRXTzPmRL06Qu8ktAdS12BHOMDZjLKVCDyh9ci2u23TUNTy/s200/John-Boyega-in-Star-Wars.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
Epic galactic movies aside, helping our kids be "spoiler-free" doesn't mean they won't make mistakes and rush into experiences prematurely. But by helping them practice self-control in small things like movies, perhaps they'll be able to save the larger things (like sex for marriage) with greater enthusiasm since they'll know the value of delayed gratification.<br />
<br />
And perhaps that will lead to multiple "best days ever" with their future spouse and kids.<br />
<br />
<i><b>What tips, thoughts, or hopes do you have on this?</b></i><br />
<br />
<i><b>P.S. <a href="http://www.lifetreefamily.com/blog/author/tmyles/" target="_blank">Check out this post and others I wrote at Lifetree Family</a> </b></i>tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-53970751777714113572015-11-26T14:35:00.001-05:002015-11-26T14:38:27.990-05:00better than I deserve<b>"Better than I deserve."</b><br />
<br />
That's how I'd describe how I feel today. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2lQ-BV0Ssx_pbi-ukiM0vEEQgulGdXX9VdQcITknGbXleHlp8Z-ujQ-GEajzAI2YefOQQ5aUHsDoLM-iZMnHbZ24JfeWNB-ik9gDHzZyhTY3SUyYEdBd2Nbw8s8dQiRr7nwIk/s1600/20151126_123541.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2lQ-BV0Ssx_pbi-ukiM0vEEQgulGdXX9VdQcITknGbXleHlp8Z-ujQ-GEajzAI2YefOQQ5aUHsDoLM-iZMnHbZ24JfeWNB-ik9gDHzZyhTY3SUyYEdBd2Nbw8s8dQiRr7nwIk/s400/20151126_123541.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
I have no words to describe the depths of my thankfulness to God for being my Father and Redeemer... for my wife Katie for being my loving, beautiful bride... for my kids being amazing miracles and gifts (whether all if good or all is cranky)... for the committed core and growing congregation of Connection Church who continues to be a movement of God unlike any other... for my extended family and circle of friends who haven't gone anywhere on me over the years, but keep investing into me and letting me invest into them.<br />
<br />
"Better than I deserve."<br />
<br />
I love you all. Happy Thanksgiving.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b>"Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever." (1 Chronicles 16:34) </b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-16156139320846577812015-11-13T01:38:00.000-05:002017-06-30T22:12:23.479-04:00my church<b>A friend of mine posted something on social media that didn't just catch my eye...</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>it caught my soul.</b></span><br />
<br />
The post read:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i>"Local friends, tell me about your church and why you like it smile emoticon. [Our family is] church searching."</i></blockquote>
Several people reasonably talked up their churches.<br />
<br />
Here's what I wrote back in reply.<br />
<br />
----<br />
<br />
<b>The Church I take part in is amazing... </b><br />
<br />
<b>I've been a part of it for more than 25 years now - </b><br />
<br />
<b>although, truthfully, it's been around for more than 2000 years.
</b><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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It's the means by which Jesus Christ has made Himself known on earth - through weird people who often get on each other's nerves, tend to put their own needs ahead of others and are looking for what they can get out of it. This Church will elevate pastors over the Father, programs over the Savior, and "the people" over the Spirit. We'll say we're committed to each other one day, and then suddenly we're not quite sure what happened.
<br />
<br />
And yet it is still a breathtaking movement of God, life change and transformation.
<br />
<br />
For all that we get wrong, God is still within His Church helping us get it right more often than we would without Him. For every wound, there is the healing touch of Jesus who continues to perform miracles through unsuspecting, ordinary people. For each clumsy stumble, there is an arm able to pick us up.
<br />
<br />
We are more than our gatherings. We are more than our doctrines. We are more than our people.
<br />
<br />
And yet we are our gatherings. We are our doctrines. We are our people.
<br />
<br />
It's this odd blend of heaven-and-earth in the same place, but not quite in the same place... as if our very existence proves God and yet pines for the fuller revelation of Him one Day - when a new heaven and new earth overlap.
<br />
<br />
It is this Church that keeps me serving the church I'm in.
<br />
<br />
It is this Church that causes me to defy the "We've got Spirit, yes we do, we've got Spirit, how 'bout you?" comparisons of congregation to congregation.<br />
<br />
It is this Church that makes me sit down with area pastors and confess my struggles and joys.
<br />
<br />
It is this Church that I invite my neighbors to... knowing I've told them about a grand Broadway musical that is being put together through second-hand-store resources.
<br />
<br />
It is this Church that inspires me to seek out people who don't even realize how much they've withdrawn.
<br />
<br />
It is this Church that I tell my kids about, my wife about, myself about... when my eyes haven't seen it in a while.
<br />
<br />
It is this Church that when our kids are bored with or complain about, we lead them... they don't lead us.
<br />
<br />
It is this Church that is to dare casual Christians to become hot or cold, and to seek and save the Lost over making everyone happy.<br />
<br />
It is this Church that is there for me and my loved ones when others are not.<br />
<br />
It is this Church that can't be tamed or criticized.<br />
<br />
It is this Church that I have been baptized into.<br />
<br />
It is this Church that I give my life for, putting its needs ahead of my own when I'd rather find something sexier to take part in.<br />
<br />
It is this Church that is searching for you as you church search.<br />
<br />
It is this Church that Jesus Christ died for even when we won't live for it.
<br />
<br />
It is this Church that He entrusted into the hands of broken people who carry His Spirit so that when we come together we truly are the Body of Christ.
<br />
<br />
Some people reject this Church because they call it "organized religion." They instead settle for disorganized spirituality... "I think God would be okay with _____, so I'm just going to _____."
<br />
<br />
But it isn't organized religion... it's organized love and holiness through intentional community with the accountability that Christ created.
<br />
<br />
The only perfect Church will be in heaven, but yet may we not forget that Jesus said "Your Kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven."
<br />
<br />
This is exactly why I take part in a church on a regular basis.
<br />
<br />
Come as you are. Take your next step with God. BE the Church.
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-12496985936424722852015-09-09T10:26:00.000-04:002016-02-24T10:30:36.361-05:00getting back on the bike (of parenting)<b>It wasn’t my finest moment in parenting. </b>
<br />
<br />
My actions embarrassed my son and made him cry on his bike, right there in the middle of the street.
<br />
<br />
All things considered, I thought he needed me to prod him with the intensity like a football coach. It turns out he needed me to be more like a horse whisperer.
<br />
<br />
All things considered, I was tired of being a horse whisperer.
<br />
<br />
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My son is 11-years old, and for a number of years he's struggled with riding his bike. It feels like every summer he's come up with a "reason" (note the quotes) about why he's just not up for it.
<br />
<br />
Right or wrong, my wife and I have allowed it. He's ridden around the neighborhood instead on his "Green Machine" (note the quotes).
<br />
<br />
I recently explained to him that enough was enough, and we were going to get out together and ride bikes until he felt confident on it. Even before we headed out to the garage, he started telling me how difficult this was going to be. He chose to wear winter gloves in case he fell.
<br />
<br />
I knew he was scared. I thought I knew what he needed to overcome it.
<br />
<br />
So I took a leap out of my usual approach and character and began to embody a football coach persona. "Let's go, no excuses," I barked. When he would stop and explain why this would just never work out, I replied, "Enough of this, get on that bike and start peddling. Now. NOW. NOW!"
<br />
<br />
Again, not my finest moment in parenting. I know there is a place for being firm, but what I started to realize is I was using this "firm opportunity for parenting" (note the quotes) to actually vent other frustrations of my life into my kid.
<br />
<br />
I realized it when I was so angry at the seventh time we'd stopped that I slammed my bike down and walked over to him and he was crying in the middle of the street.
<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>We finished the ride, went home and debriefed. I first justified my actions by explaining he needed me to be firm.
</b><br />
<br />
<b>Then an hour later, I was near him again - asking him to forgive me for handling it wrong. </b><br />
<br />
I explained, "Even if that's what you needed, I didn't tell you I was going to take that tone with you. Even more, I let some anger out that had nothing to do with you."
<br />
<br />
He nodded. He put his hand on mine.
<br />
<br />
I continued, "Will you give me a chance to get this right again tomorrow? Can I reset with you somehow on this?"
<br />
<br />
And he let me. And we did. And I was the horse whisperer he needed.
<br />
<br />
Four days in a row of biking later, my son and I came across some deer who literally bolted in front of us as we rode. He and I stopped together and watched them for ten minutes, saying nothing out loud but enjoying the moment together. Later that night he said, "Dad, I'm so glad you made me to get on my bike this week. I feel like God gave us that time with the deer today as a special gift just for us."
<br />
<br />
I was thankful, but again had to apologize. "Buddy, I'm so sorry I handled things wrong on the first day. Maybe by you seeing me fail, though, you'll learn how to handle it when you fail someday. We all will. Thanks for giving me a second chance to try again... for getting back on the bike."
<br />
<br />
I know the story doesn't always end like this.
<br />
<br />
I also know sometimes that has more to do with how easy it is for us to not admit we were wrong as parents.
<br />
<br />
But we are... sometimes... often.
<br />
<br />
<b>When have you felt the strength of admitting you were weak?</b><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><i>"Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4) </i></span></b></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-81246560249953298962015-07-03T17:16:00.003-04:002015-07-03T17:25:21.962-04:00empty flirting, whole kid<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b>Sometimes you just humbly get to experience a moment of "Normal" through your kids.</b><br />
<br />
I was bike riding with both of my boys last night and we happened to take our usual path. We tend to follow it twice in the same ride, in fact. Near the end of the first lap, we passed by a local party of teenage girls who were around my oldest son's age. They were playing music, hitting around a volleyball and just being girls.<br />
<br />
As my oldest rounded the corner near them, four the girls started chasing after him. It was group flirting - the kind that many of us have likely been on the giving or receiving end of over the years. A part of me smiled as I watched it unfold. I felt flattered that they thought he was cute.<br />
<br />
A common parental response.<br />
<br />
As we geared up to do our second lap, he asked me about what had happened. "Why did they do that?" <br />
<br />
"Guys and girls sometimes do that. I suppose they thought there was something about you that they found attractive."<br />
<br />
"That just seems sort of random," he stated. "I'm not interested in flirting like that. It's kind of empty somehow."<br />
<br />
I was spontaneously inspired at his wisdom. "Yeah... I guess it is."<br />
<br />
"Maybe they were just having fun, but I sort of don't want to do that. I want to just save that for my wife one day, you know? I'm not up for having people play with my feelings like that, and I don't want to play with theirs. Can we take another path back instead of that way?"<br />
<br />
I looked over this 14-year old in front of me. He really said all of this.<br />
<br />
He wasn't embarrassed. He wasn't shy.<br />
<br />
He was confident. He had a conviction... a driving value about the way things could be and should be.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>The Normal way to live.</b><br />
<br />
It wasn't this common bantering of emptiness we toss back and forth to others as we summarize "There's no big deal in a little flirting." I don't want to arm wrestle you on that, but I do want to offer the overview my son again later shared: "Why would I waste energy raising and lowering someone's feelings like that, let alone my own? I'm going to save all that for when it matters most. I'm fine without it. Let's do something else in the meantime."<br />
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I didn't grow up this way. Anytime I was near a girl I had friends and family who were quick to say, <i>"Oh, look! How cute. They like each other."</i> It's funny how I found that to be the first reaction I was going for in this moment.<br />
<br />
And then my son corrected me by being a more solid kid at his age than I was at his age.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Did I say kid? I meant emerging man.</b><br />
<br />
I told him that later, in fact. "You know what, bud... what you did earlier? <i>That's manhood.</i> You're going to get all kinds of versions of what manhood is as you get older, but listen to me on this... that is what a man does. You are letting yourself become whole on the inside in order to confidently face down the brokenness all around you on the outside. That's going to be an incredible gift to anyone around you now or into the future."<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTVV7I8SLHtClJU6DijjmRvvCp3VbSNmWP641nI_p2ISErguDmqZR-yrbOHmLFRnIoT-UgEDo6ZenjydNTF0Ame858QMPhhZ06Dc3clgh1FjiOHjGjwAmcr1wq0w5hP7LpMNPa/s1600/bike2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="104" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTVV7I8SLHtClJU6DijjmRvvCp3VbSNmWP641nI_p2ISErguDmqZR-yrbOHmLFRnIoT-UgEDo6ZenjydNTF0Ame858QMPhhZ06Dc3clgh1FjiOHjGjwAmcr1wq0w5hP7LpMNPa/s200/bike2.jpg" width="200" /></a><b>So we took a different path back.</b><br />
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*This* is freedom.<br />
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What a Normal moment.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: yellow;"><i><b><span class="text Ps-119-9">"How can a young man keep his way pure? </span><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"></span><span class="text Ps-119-9">By guarding it according to Your word.</span></span><span class="text Ps-119-10" id="en-ESV-15909"><sup> </sup>With my whole heart I seek You; </span><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"></span><span class="text Ps-119-10">let me not wander from Your commandments!</span></span><span class="text Ps-119-11" id="en-ESV-15910"> I have stored up Your word in my heart,</span><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-119-11">that I might not sin against You.</span></span><span class="text Ps-119-12" id="en-ESV-15911"><sup> </sup>Blessed are You, O <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>;</span> <span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"></span><span class="text Ps-119-12">teach me your statutes!</span></span>" (Psalm 119:9-12) </b></i></span></blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15733794.post-15825935666600938602015-06-30T00:12:00.000-04:002016-02-01T02:18:44.203-05:00parenting - may the force be with you<span style="font-size: large;"><b>My son didn't want to talk about it.</b></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglf6JovOAzYaIOfwrz411thzZa6N3nuBjXI5gztcpUfbKQFiGA4QAoBhQYe02EwZ3-WPZITlz-lBxh0WDHlxzyozGXl8xZxzfw1JRLOHNA56_Uc-4QP4KXSGzL7NbkAUesILD3/s1600/oftueh-l.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglf6JovOAzYaIOfwrz411thzZa6N3nuBjXI5gztcpUfbKQFiGA4QAoBhQYe02EwZ3-WPZITlz-lBxh0WDHlxzyozGXl8xZxzfw1JRLOHNA56_Uc-4QP4KXSGzL7NbkAUesILD3/s320/oftueh-l.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
That didn't mean I was fine with that, though. The text message I'd received about what had happened in our neighborhood really set me off.
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Now I was driving home late at night and realized what he needed most was to feel understood, even at this crazy hour.
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That's when it hit me... it felt like God himself showed me what needed to be done.
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<b>What my son needed most was to feel understood.</b>
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He'd had a rough night with some local kids, and it wasn't the first time. Perhaps it all added up, but it had really rattled him. My wife shared that he walked into the house angry that he wasn't allowed to just punch them all. "I'm not sure I like being a Christian in these moments," he vented.
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I was at a meeting when it all happened and didn't come home until about 10pm. It was a school night, but since we do an online public school we have some wiggle room with our schedule. Knocking on his door, I was invited in. Apparently he was still awake.
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"Hey buddy," I began. "Can you come downstairs?"
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"Okay," he replied, assuming we were about to have a lecture.
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We stood in our kitchen for a moment as I continued. "Do you have anything big in the morning, like a test?"
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"No," he replied, somewhat puzzled.
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"Want to watch a movie?" I asked.
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"Um, sure... wait, is mom okay with that?"
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Smart kid.
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"She is, or rather she's trusting however I want to spend this time with you. So a movie it is. Want a snack? Some ice cream, maybe?"
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"Okay," he replied, smiling.
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"How about a soda, too?"
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"YEAH!"
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5F6v8SUrggJnf_hFKqZ4-icd8VpXfBdWQl8PK08k8fT-E0Kax9eoR34ul1AjF3ynlLjv_LdfuUie-0qXIjG5dLSARkaSQr_oGjhCG3rQrQqpoDIQhkA3pGDvk-QvmelakY6ZjrA/s1600/11150462_10155443364820048_2823602326263287270_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5F6v8SUrggJnf_hFKqZ4-icd8VpXfBdWQl8PK08k8fT-E0Kax9eoR34ul1AjF3ynlLjv_LdfuUie-0qXIjG5dLSARkaSQr_oGjhCG3rQrQqpoDIQhkA3pGDvk-QvmelakY6ZjrA/s320/11150462_10155443364820048_2823602326263287270_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
I know... it was a horrible move in terms of nutrition. He ended up combining the ice cream with with his soda. I opted for adding a ton of fruit to mine. My wife and I have started eating healthier, and this move let him know that I was willing to make a concession so we could bond over it together.
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<b>As if to say, "I see you."</b>
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We took it over to our living room and popped in the movie. Before I hit play, I showed him pictures of two of my adult friends on Facebook.
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"This is Scott," I explained. "And this is Mike. Scott always tried to get Mike and I to get along, but I couldn't stand Mike and he couldn't stand me. Then one day in high school we somehow became friends. I've followed his career as a video game designer, including when he designed some games for George Lucas and the Star Wars franchise."
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"Cool," my son replied.
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"In honor of Mike, we're going to watch a Star Wars movie you haven't seen yet."
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And so we began watching Episode 3 in the Star Wars saga around 10:30pm on a school night.
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<b>As if to say, "I know you."</b>
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If you know the plot of that movie, you probably realize why I picked it. In it, Anakin Skywalker lets his fear, anger and insecurities get the best of him to the point that he strays into the dark side. Much pain and hurt occurs in the lives around him because of it. The movie took the place of any lecture I might have given, like some kind of backdoor parenting.
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I realized this when my son observed, "Anakin really lost his way. I can relate to how he feels, but what he did was just wrong. I'm kind of glad I didn't just go off on those guys tonight. Was that God helping me?"
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I nodded, which led into a brief exchange about how wise I thought my son was for seeing through the moment and grasping the larger picture.
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<b>As if to say, "I understand you."</b>
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I know that what I've described may all sound either weird to a casual reader, or that I'm perhaps some time of zen-master parent who always nails this kind of stuff. Honestly, I'm probably closer to the former than the latter.
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I do appreciate the Holy Spirit's leadership in such moments, though. Perhaps in sharing the win with my kid out loud it inspires you to do something similar in your parenting... sort of a "may the force be with you" baton pass.
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<b>By more deeply connecting with your kids you help them more deeply connect with God.</b>
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Be unconditional.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><i>"If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" (Matthew 7:11)</i></span></b> </blockquote>
tonymyleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11396458619687708153noreply@blogger.com0