don't call me Veronica

party rock is in the house tonight - literally

2012-01-20T13:59:00.000-05:00

Party rock is in the house tonight.

Literally.

Apparently this whole video was made with MS Paint.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNr_M3kbWQA&feature=player_embedded

a baby who doesn't look like God... yet

2011-12-25T11:02:00.010-05:00

When Jesus came, He was first presented to shepherds as a helpless baby lying in the manger… they were told He would be the Savior.

The baby name is Jesus – and He is the Christ.

Only… he doesn’t look like it.

“He looks like anything but a king. His face is prunish and red. His cry, although strong and healthy, is a piercing and helpless cry for He is absolutely dependent upon Mary for His well being.

He is majesty in the midst of the mundane. He is holiness the midst of sheep manure and sweat. He enters the world on the floor of a stable, through the womb of a teenager & in the presence of a carpenter.”

– Max Lucado

This baby had once overlooked the entire universe.
Now He overlooks straw.

He left His golden throne room in heaven.
Now He sits in a feeding trough in a dirty sheep’s den.

Angels were singing His praises because they couldn’t get enough of Him.
Now he is overlooked by a world who wouldn’t make room for His birth.

Its what Jesus did for us... and what He does for us.

That is, if we don't leave the Greatest Gift unwrapped to concentrate on all the other ones.

Merry Christmas.

"A Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord." (Luke 2:11b)

an open letter to my facebook friends

2011-12-09T11:18:00.000-05:00

So after a week off Facebook (on vacation), I've concluded a handful of things. Here is an open letter to my online friends:

1) If we're friends, let's hang out. In real life... not merely electronically. I mean this, whether we live close by or occasionally make it into each other's geography. Let me know if you're interested.

2) If we once were friends and something happened, can we sit down and work it out instead of playing some sort of evasive game with half-smiles? My "door" is always open and my heart is to reconcile - which leaves the ball in your court. Be of courage, and not cowardice on this.

3) If we're not friends and I am merely a number on your growing network so you can network your network into a network of networks, drop me.

4) If you're being a jerk and don't see it or don't care to, I will be that guy who will show you. For the context of this statement, consider that I just cycled through a week's worth of posts to see what I missed on FB. Wow... we should all do this on our own posts - what many of us consider to be fun ribbing or harmless venting comes off as destructive. So whether you're grumbling about people, politics or whatever, if we're friends I will hear you out and likewise encourage you to pay attention to your patterns even if no one else will - please do the same for me.

5) If we have some sort of relationship, I will be inviting you to experience Christmas unlike ever before... be it joining us at Connection Church this month or you finding your own home church. Jesus Christ is more than a baby in a manger... He is your Savior, and if you've settled for spirituality or mere religious traditions, you are missing out. Because I care about you, I will be as authentic as I can in inviting you and challenging you to not miss out.

6) If you made it this far, reread #1.

why pray?

2011-11-22T15:51:00.003-05:00

As best as I can, I try to keep up with different conversations happening around the world through friendships and networking online. One caught my attention recently:

"Please tell me why you pray."

This wasn't asked by someone who isn't familiar with Christianity, but by someone I know who asks thought-provoking questions to make sure we aren't becoming robotic in our expressions of worship. Perhaps that's why the question made me chuckle, not because it isn't a good one but because I likely would have answered it different ways over the years. When I was younger I may have said "Because we're supposed to," and as I entered into a season of agnosticism in my early teens I probably would have arrogantly spewed, "Because it's a goofy tradition." As I grew in my faith, I might have replied, "It helps me connect with God better." Perhaps I may have even stated 5 to 10 years ago, "Jesus commanded it - right there in the Sermon on the Mount."

I'm not sure how I'll answer that question in the future, but here was my confident reply this week:

"My only answer to the question 'Why pray?' is simply 'Why breathe?'"

Although that made perfect sense to me, I received a reply via Twitter:

"Tony, with all due respect, that statement makes no sense."

First off, I appreciate the "all due respect" part. Sometimes we fail to honor responses and replies that don't fit within our scheme of how we see the world, or are trying to make a point at the world. To return the favor, I'm writing this blog post since Twitter only allows 140 characters of thought or pushback. If I had more space to communicate my thought, I would add the following:

"Sure it does, but maybe not with your initial glance. Consider what each has in common with the other.

Breathing is the unconscious pathway to life that can be at times a conscious decision, such as taking a deep breath or holding your breath. Even with such actions, you eventually will lapse into it being an unconscious activity because sleep takes over or you become weary of being so intentional; however, there are times where holding your breath makes sense to avoid injecting harmful fluids or gas, and other times where a deep breath brings nourishment and relaxation to your body.

Prayer is the activity of 'breathing' for the Christ-follower: it is something a spiritually restored person does to unconsciously stay alive with God (Matthew 6), and this is assisted by the Holy Spirit through even our groans (Romans 8:26). We can also take the action of 'holding our prayers' when we begin to babble unnecessarily and cross a line Jesus warned against; similarly, we can also 'Selah' and pause to find our rest and renewal by intentionally and slowly exhaling our burdens and inhaling the realities of God... something we're encouraged to do continually, or without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17).

So I apologize for writing something in the form of a question that is full of such detail... but prayer is as unconscious as breathing, and in this way everything we do can be a form of it. Likewise, we don't need to fear it taking on a conventional form at times because we don't want to look like simpleton Christians, but it is more than those conventional forms people turn it into. For all we may want to criticize them, sometimes our drive to appear unconventional keeps us from missing the Trinity in the ceiling fan, if you know what I mean."

I hope that helps clarify, and blesses others on the journey of being neither conventional nor unconventional... but simply open to and interactive with the Lord.

some serious ripples for Jesus Christ

2011-11-13T21:55:00.003-05:00

So I'm in speechless awe... apparently Connection Church, missionary Cathy E Perman, 13-year old Hannah Christian, Brenda Ingram-Christian, Lawrence Owino Omondi and Medina, Ohio made some big ripples for Jesus locally, regionally, nationally and internationally by going hungry. To God be the glory for the ripples:

- Front page of the Akron-Beacon Journal: http://www.ohio.com/news/local-news/experiencing-taste-of-poverty-local-congregation-accepts-rice-and-bean-challenge-1.245303

- ABC Action News: http://www.13abc.com/story/16027764/ohio-congregation-goes-hungry-raises-money

- Dayton Daily News: http://www.daytondailynews.com/news/ohio-news/ohio-congregation-goes-hungry-raises-money-1283898.html

- Cincinnati Fox 19: http://www.fox19.com/story/16027764/ohio-congregation-goes-hungry-raises-money

- ABC Columbus: http://www.abc6onyourside.com/template/inews_wire/wires.regional.oh/3cb6853e-www.abc6onyourside.com.shtml

- Newark News: http://www.newarkadvocate.com/usatoday/article/37931525?odyssey=mod%7Cnewswell%7Ctext%7CFrontpage%7Cp

- Kenya News (yeah, KENYA): http://www.kenyanews24.com/news/experiencing-taste-of-poverty-local-congregation-accepts-rice-and-bean-challenge-akron-beacon-journal

- India Times (yeah, INDIA): http://oneclick.indiatimes.com/article/02037xF5wc1Oe?q=Ohio

- Middle East North Africa Financial Network (yeah, a whole lot of AFRICA): http://www.menafn.com/qn_news_story.asp?storyid=%7B22cbf2cd-9aa1-4b26-be9e-c2087fb150a7%7D

me at the mall tonight with the kids

2011-11-03T21:29:00.003-04:00

It's always interesting when I get to the mall with the kids. Within moments of walking in the door, we were almost run over by a train that randomly drives around the mall. My oldest son turned to me and asked, "Did we just become a part of a Bugs Bunny cartoon?"

Pretty good one-liner... made me laugh out loud. Here are a few of mine that popped out of me throughout the night:

--

Kiosk Salesperson #1: "Excuse me, sir?" (as I'm walking along) "What phone do you use?" (she's obviously trying to get me to tell her the wrong answer because she's selling the right answer)

Me: "The one in my pocket." (I keep walking)

--

Kiosk Salesperson #2: "Hey there! Didn't you guys just walk by?" (I had to double back to look for my daughter's shoe)

Me: "Yes. God is running out of extras. We're pulling a double shift for you tonight."

--

Food court vendors:

#1: Free chicken on a toothpick?

#2: Free chicken on a toothpick?

#3: Free chicken on a toothpick?

#4: Free chicken sandwich on a toothpick?

#5: Free frozen yogurt sample?

Me: Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure.

By the way, this yogurt place blasts techno music mixed with 80's songs while you pick from among a couple dozen flavors that you pump out yourself. Pretty cool sample.

my son's prayer today

2011-10-26T09:14:00.000-04:00

I just overheard my youngest son's breakfast prayer:

"Dear God, thank You that I got to stay up late last night, and thank You for this delicious-looking donut!. And please help the Murphy's to have what they need to help the children of Africa. Thanks that Joshua got to go to Eli's diner, and please help me to have a good legacy today. In Jesus' Name, Amen."

book review: muscular faith

2011-10-14T16:44:00.000-04:00

Everybody who considers themselves "spiritual" or "somewhat religious" tries to have a good faith... not everybody trains for it.

I recently dug into the book "Muscular Faith" by Ben Patterson. It covers what a lot of us find out after we've taken hold of a genuine faith in Jesus Christ: faith is quite difficult and will challenge you from every angle. Those who spend the time developing the muscles of faith by exercising and training it on easier days will find what they need to stand up during the weighty seasons of life.

Picture Patterson like a personal trainer:
(1) Part one is him showing you where you're at and could be.
(2) Part two is him sharing with you what your workout could look like.
(3) Part three is him sharing with you the temptations and obstacles you'll face toward reaching your goal.
(4) Part four is him giving you words of encouragement for the short-term and long-term challenges of your faith journey.

Patterson does well with articulating his ideas, although it seems as if I've heard some of the concepts before in other books. It's a great read if you haven't dug into much of this kind of thinking before, but could frustrate those looking for something new.

Thanks to Tyndale House Publishers for the free copy of this book.

jersey shore and reading material

2011-10-14T12:59:00.001-04:00

hakuna matata

2011-10-03T09:23:00.000-04:00

Apparently, Timon and Pumba are real.

i will sing... sing a new song

2011-09-29T00:00:00.001-04:00

I waited patiently for the LORD;
And He inclined to me,
And heard my cry.

He also brought me up
out of a horrible pit,
Out of the miry clay,
And set my feet upon a rock,
And established my steps.

He has put a new song in my mouth—
Praise to our God;
Many will see it and fear,
And will trust in the LORD.

- Psalm 40:1-3, to the Chief Musician

the joy of tech

2011-09-21T23:49:00.001-04:00

Given all the complaining happening this week with the new Facebook layout, I thought I'd post this timely cartoon for your enjoyment.

three days in denver

2011-09-16T02:20:00.002-04:00

For three days this week I enjoyed hanging out in Denver, Colorado with the good folks at Group Publishing and Simply Youth Ministry. I kept a running log of my adventures through some strategic pictures. Here's a quick glimpse at my trip.

DAY ONE

The phrase "LIVE ANIMALS" is never a good thing to see in the overhead bin of your airplane.

Something I don't imagine I will ever do in my life: The airport shoe shine.

Everyone breathes a sigh of relief when you realize your luggage isn't lost.

I was told to bring sunglasses because Denver is bright everywhere. You be the judge... but just so you know, this is a picture of a closet inside a basement, under a mountain.

Apparently this guy used to be in the cast for Spiderman on Broadway.

Simply breathtaking landscape.

I determined not to be the first one to grab a nametag.

Free snacks - I truly enjoyed the yogurt pretzels.

Thom & Joani Shultz - two people who changed the landscape of youth ministry.

Standing behind Shane and Shane as they lead backyard worship.

Another view, behind Andy Brazelton and Jon Acuff. (pic by Tim Schmoyer)

DAY TWO

When you wake up and have unlimited access to bacon, it's going to be a fun day.

Morning worship. Good times. Great perspective.

Box lunches? Where are we going?

Our outdoor lunch location... and a prayer walk that Rick Lawrence put together.

Rocky mountain high. Wait... oh... NOW I more clearly understand the career of John Denver.

Seriously, this food was amazing. I can't believe how well they took care of us.

Hanging out at Thom and Joani Shultz's house for some tasty desserts.

DAY THREE

The infamous talking moose at Group Publishing.

Yes, we actually were there for a purpose... to breathe in and breathe out whatever God was sifting in us, and fold it into the Simply Youth Ministry Conference in March 2012.

There was no shortage of savory cookies.

This chair proves that creative people walk this earth. Is it a desk? Useful for disciplining kids? An art major's ottoman?

See ya, Group! Thanks for your incredible heart for God and His Church!

Security check, anyone?

Somehow I not only scored the exit row, but I was blessed to have it all to myself. Ask me sometime about the people I sat next to on the flight to Denver (it was like a Seinfeld episode). But for now, I'll end on this high note.

sharing some perspective

2011-09-13T20:54:00.001-04:00

Over the past few months I've been blessed to share some perspective on Cleveland NBC and CBS News. Here are the links to those pieces - I'd appreciate your prayers for any impact they might have on these themes. Thanks!

9/11 and Religion - 10 Years Later: http://www.wkyc.com/news/article/206378/278/%40-the-Table-Religion-911-at-Connection-Church

Editorial Response to Celebrating Osama Bin Laden's Death: http://www.woio.com/story/14670974/editorial-response-tony

my seven-year old's future job description

2011-09-04T11:29:00.001-04:00

My seven-year old son wanted to float a few future career choices by me this week.

Him: Dad?

Me: Yeah?

Him: What do you think about me fighting in the army someday?

Me: Well... I know a lot of people who have done that. The Army helps our country stay safe.

Him: Yeah, I'm thinking about fighting in it.

Me: There certainly are times when we need to fight to protect something, but I'm not a big fan of fighting to just fight. I hope if you do join the Army someday that you do it to protect others and not to just fight.

Him: Yeah. Well, either that, or I'm thinking about working at Amazone.

Me: The laser tag place?

Him: Yeah.

Me: That's a good choice, too.

earthquake punchline

2011-08-23T18:33:00.000-04:00

I hope this isn't in bad taste, because so far I hear there aren't any casualties to the earthquake today. That said, take a look at the headline that was at the top of my Twitter feed (via this screenshot).

a favor?

2011-08-05T14:36:00.004-04:00

A favor?

Do you mind taking a moment to "thumbs up" my nomination on this page? I would love the opportunity to be a part of this conversation among people in ministry. It's really not a self-promotion thing... I am hoping to jump into what I perceive to be an important dialogue.

Search for my name - it's currently around #70. Also feel free to pass this around - thanks!

http://list.ly/list/I9-nominate-speakers-for-the-2011-nines

my two ladies over my past two days

2011-07-29T23:53:00.001-04:00

Yesterday I soaked up watching my little lady Johanna turning one-years old. She has her official party coming up this weekend, but we did a lot of family stuff this week - zoo, special cupcakes, presents from her brother, and more.

Then today I was able to enjoy an evening with my lovely, awesome wife as we celebrated 17 years of marriage. We tried some new food through a restaurant gift card we were given, and reminisced about what we often reminisce about on such occasions. Even more intriguing was to realize what we don't think about in this season of life that we once stressed over.

I share all of this because it is all by the hand of God that this is possible. I've certainly done my best to follow Him, but He has gifted me with these two ladies (and my incredible boys) not because I deserve them... because they are all out of my league. Rather, I think it has more to do with His crazy love for us to reach into imperfect possibilities and invite us into something greater than what we could come up with on our own.

The depth to which I have enjoyed these past two days has no words. Thank you, Lord.

Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift! (2 Corinthians 9:15)

a wallet, a worry and a wow

2011-06-30T17:33:00.007-04:00

I lost my wallet a day and a half ago.

Maybe you know the first round of such a loss, including the rounds that follow:

Round 1: "Hmm... my wallet isn't where I left it. Aw well, it's probably in one of the other two or three places I usually throw it down."
Round 2: "That's weird. It's not in any of those places. Well... maybe it's in what I was wearing the other day. Let's see, is that in the washer or hamper... or on the floor next to the bed...?"
Round 3: "Okay.... where the heck is my wallet? I guess I need to check the car or van. Maybe I left it in there."
Round 4: "HEY CAN SOMEONE LOOK UNDER THE COUCH FOR ME WHILE I LIFT IT UP?"
Round 5:

(someone else) "Where was the last place you had it?"

(me, internally) "Brilliant. Why didn't I ask myself that question? The last place I had it is where it would be, Einstein."

(me, out loud) "I have no idea."
Round 6: "Hey, boys? Can you help Dad look for his wallet?"
Round 7: "I guess you have to drive us there, because I don't have my wallet."
Round 8: "Hi, I was outside your store the other day renting a movie from the Blockbuster kiosk. Did anyone happen to find a wallet and turn it in yesterday or today?"
Round 9: "SERIOUSLY! CAN SOMEONE LOOK AGAIN UNDER THE COUCH WHILE I LIFT IT UP?"
Round 10: (praying) "God, I am so hosed. I'm going to give this two more hours. I'm going to tear apart anything movable in the car and van... rip the sheets off the bed... turn the hamper upside down... because I am out of options and am worrying my head off about identity theft and someone draining our checking, savings, and everything in between. Seriously, God, I don't say 'suck' that often but that would really suck."

(pause, spontaneously recalls a Bible verse... for some reason)

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? - Jesus, in Matthew "something"

(me) "Oh... yeah. So... God... I don't want to worry about this. I mean, I know there are things I will need to do if I can't find my wallet. I also know there are some real issues I may have to deal with identity theft. But, you know what... I don't want to worry and I know you can help me with that. So I'd like to find it, but whether I do or don't I'm going to trust You with this completely, no matter how it turns out. That's that."
Round 11: (five minutes after that prayer, now speaking to self) "Okay... I need to tear out all the stuff in my trunk... and then the backseat... and then..."

(text message sound on my phone goes off)

(to self) "I wonder who that is."

(the text message is from Twitter, updating me about someone mentioning my name in a post. "Whatever," I think. Then I look below it at another text I missed from five minutes earlier - it was Katie texting me to tell me she found my wallet. You know, right about when I was praying.)

By no means am I proposing that when you pray "everything works out like you want it to."

I can say that there have been significant, clear times that I have shifted my perspective to trust in God in incredibly hard situations and this has happened. Maybe I was in a long season of waiting on something to change - or what just seemed like a long season because of the worry - and "nothing changed." It's not like I was asking for bad things... but I was asking God for "something" instead of merely finding my home in Him, "no matter what."

Once I did make that shift, though, there were significant moments were something almost instantaneously changed externally... perhaps because of what had shifted internally.

I don't know how all of this works. I wish this was a formula, but if it was it wouldn't be a relationship.

Wow.

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." (1 Peter 5:7)

book review: anatomy of the soul

2011-05-24T00:43:00.000-04:00

Some books wrinkle your brain when you read the cover, and "Anatomy of the Soul" is no slouch. The subtitle is "Surprising Connections between Neuroscience and Spiritual Practices That Can Transform Your Life and Relationships." In a nutshell, this resource I received for free from the Tyndale Blogging Network explores the connection between the mind and your faith in the way it impacts how you relate with others. This involves exploring your past (and your memories of it) to better understand why you are where you are and the things you are pursuing to find a deeper meaning in life.

I'm not kidding when I say this - it's high-end reading. It will change the way you think about God, and I mean that literally... the way/manner you "think" about God. The book contains some well-told everyday stories that harness a recognition of otherwise "heady" scientific terms, allowing the average reader to better track with some concepts that are typically found in academic circles. The big takeaway from this is a better awareness of how neurological pathways work in order to create and strengthen your integrity in living out your beliefs.

The main downside is that any references to biblical truths are more summarized than anchored. The author offers some decent ideas in how to better grow your faith, but without clear teaching these ideas remain opinions at best. It left my final takeaway less inclined to recommend the book and more apt to quote parts of it.

an after-dinner conversation in the Myles home

2011-04-27T19:58:00.000-04:00

The scene: After dinner. I'd just made some delicious fajitas. We're putting things away, and I see a chance to flirt with my wife.

Me: "So... is this your lettuce?" (shows brand label to Katie - it says "Foxy" on it)

Katie: (laughs)

(seconds later, I shift to an entirely new conversation. I see some sour candy on the counter the kids don't like)

Me: So, is this my candy?

Both of us instantly and awkwardly see the name on the candy is "Trolli."

Me: (quickly) Doh... nevermind.

Katie: (laughs) Did you do that on purpose?

Me: OF COURSE NOT!

Katie: (laughs) You couldn't do that again if you tried.

reason #407 why my wife rocks

2011-04-23T01:08:00.000-04:00

Reason #407 why my wife rocks...

I open the fridge and see things like this that she spent time working on with our kids.

I love you, Katie Myles.

good friday - breathe

2011-04-22T13:34:00.000-04:00

It's Good Friday, and the cross is Jesus' way of saying "I've got my nail pierced hand on you, and I'm not letting go. You have a choice to remain, or run."

Praying you don't turn away but embrace the embrace.

Breathe... just breathe.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-dVZAtU3SDs

perhaps addressing temptation is just this easy

2011-04-17T21:35:00.002-04:00

Just before bed, Daniel (my seven-year old) walked over and handed me some soft discs for a gun that flings them across the room. He was about to address his responsibilities - pajamas, toothbrushing, and so on.

He asked, "Dad? Will you hold these so I wont be distracted by them?"

"Oh, sure," I said, realizing that's what a good dad does.

Only... I felt like I'd been smacked with a shovel.

I mean, why don't I do this more often with my Father?

No, seriously.

Ever notice how often we talk about how hard it is to not be distracted by the emotions and temptations in our life? Things that have greater appeal than what we're responsible for?

Perhaps addressing temptation is just this easy.

No, seriously.

"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." (1 Corinthians 10:13)

a really, really good Story

2011-03-21T17:21:00.000-04:00

I had a great breakfast this morning with one of my sons. We went to Eli's Kitchen for breakfast - one of our favorite places to get some dad/son time in. They serve a cheap, greasy omelet and a heck of a piece of toast - but we didn't go there for the hometown food. It's "our place" to key into the choices he has in front of him and the consequences of each.

We spent some time talking about the power of those decisions... and how life is about more than decisions. It's primarily about the core thing you live in, for that alone will determine not only what happens next but how you relate to God in the midst of it.

Some conclude He doesn't exist and turn their backs on Him.
Others believe that you should "believe," and that's good enough.
Many hold to the idea that you have to outweigh your bad decisions with good decisions, or else God won't let you into heaven
Then there is the epic journey concept - that we are taking part in His Story and by His grace get to interact with Him in ways that make us grow and add to what He's up to.

I shared this morning that I will love him no matter what path he chooses. Likewise, I gave him some direction on how each has its easy and tough points. Using a model I've come to appreciate from my friend Chris Folmsbee via Barefoot Ministries, we spoke about how what we start with determines the rest.

Simply put:

If your core priority is behavior, you will be more concerned with what you (and others) do than who you (and others) are becoming.

The appeal? It's easy to change your behavior and feel like you've accomplished something.

If your core priority is your way of life, you will be more concerned with maintaining a standard of living (including how it appears to others, such as your finances, relational or spiritual life) than in making sacrificial changes that leads you to someplace more authentic.

The appeal? By keeping your life looking a certain way, you will continue to feel you've conquered your past or are "winning" against your peers.

If your core priority is your identity, then whatever you think you are will forever determine how you view anything else - such as "Well, I was born with this temperament/orientation/etc and have no choice but to give into it."

The appeal? We live in a culture that makes its arguments by promoting diversity versus clarity.

If your core priority is your theology, you will become insecure when it is in question and angry at others who don't hold to it as you do.

The appeal? You can find a number of truths that will help you feel like you are as mature as their significance merely because you believe them.

If your core priority is God and His Story, you will become less able to be the star of your life and will be forced to put larger things into a better perspective.

The appeal? We all know deep down that we are not actually the one who makes the final determination of things in this world, and joining into a relationship with God allows us to become the pen and Him to become the writer.

Again, whichever one you start with will inform the others... so if you are opting for something on the surface level, your roots won't truly be as deep as you think they are. However, if you start with the deepest place possible - your relationship with your Creator - then life isn't about what you can or can't do, but about your willingness to join into something bigger than you that happens to include you.

Somehow I managed to share this at a level my son could understand. So much so, in fact, that I watched a huge weight get lifted off his shoulders this morning. He even was eyeballing the small camouflage Bible that I carried, and I gave it to him.

When he walked in the door from school today, one of the first things he said was, "Dad, thanks for making time this morning to talk with me. It really helped me figure some things out, and I really feel a lot closer to God now because of it."

I know some parents believe we're not supposed to expose our kids to any options about faith, or wait until they bring it up. Unfortunately, silence creates beliefs, too - such as "That's really not important." Apathy isn't as sophisticated as it sounds.

I have to say there is something powerful about simply taking the time to create space for dialogue that wouldn't have happened otherwise. That after-school comment is worth the price of the greasy omelet I've since regretted scarfing down. He even commented an interest and a start in reading the Bible on his own.

This may simply be a good story. Then again, if it is it's only because of a really, really good Story.

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. (Matthew 16:24)

reclaiming lent beyond religious baggage

2011-03-09T21:42:00.006-05:00

Lent is a season of preparation... of opening your heart up in fresh ways to God.

Unfortunately, for many of us it's something that has religious baggage to it.

I probably need to clarify, because when I say "God" many people think I mean "religion." The two are very different.

Yet for many, Lent is a "Catholic thing" or some other denominational affiliation. Others turn it into "New Year's Resolutions Pt 2" where we try to be better or give up something for a month and a half.

At its true core, Lent is a non-religious thing... it's instead a spiritual conversation between you and God. During this "season of 40 days" (with Sundays being their own days outside of this), we intentionally reflect with God on where we may be falling short in our heart, soul, mind, strength and relationships. It’s more than changing our diet, giving up a vice or "not playing internet poker" during this season… it’s about sacrificially making room for God to grow us as we trust in His goodness to be our God (even in places it isn’t easy). All of this “preparation” is to help us make the most of when we eventually celebrate Jesus’ death and resurrection.

Instead of giving up something inconsequential, what if instead you took on something that has ripples relationally and spiritually? Here are some ideas:

Heart: Use a notebook to daily journal thoughts about a family member you love. Write down what they do each day that encourages you, and what specifically about that day you appreciated that they did for you, themselves, another, or God. Give it to them on Easter.
Soul: Turn your household or friendships in a prayer-based one. Put out a box or bowl with notecards next to it. Ask others to write down and drop praises and prayer requests into it, and set aside time to pray for them – be it something that happens together daily or weekly, or on your own. Use email or create a private Facebook page for relationships that may be across the miles.
Mind: Find a passage of Scripture to memorize by yourself or with others. Pick something that is a reasonable challenge, such as all of Psalm 1 or a section of the Sermon on the Mount (Mathew 5-7). Look at the books of James or Philippians for great paragraphs full of amazing truth.
Strength: Spend the money you normally spend on indulgences (fancy drinks, movies, etc) in a more productive place. Set it aside when you would have used it, and then give it in the name of Jesus to someone in need, a local cause, a global ministry, or a church you believe in.
Relationships: Have the “conversation you keep putting off” with other people. Where there has been a tension, don’t ignore it and go the final 10% of reconciliation instead of backing away out of a reaction. If someone doesn’t know Jesus personally, walk across the space of awkwardness and share your story with God. If you know someone needs encouragement, stop being too busy to offer it. In every area of life, “raise your antenna” to the Holy Spirit and do whatever He asks you to do – not just what’s easy.

A few other ideas:

Money-free Mondays: Go through your entire day without spending money on anything.
No-TV Tuesdays: Keep the TV off (or any screen where you watch things for entertainment or play video games on). Invest into something else that nurtures friendships, such a board games.
Weird Wednesdays: Try new foods individually or as a household that you normally wouldn’t. Recognize and celebrate the creativity of God as you do.
Thumbs-Free Thursday: Give up all cell phone activity, including text messaging.
Friendship Friday: Pay attention to those who may often get overlooked, and seek them out in friendship through your time and encouraging words.
Something-New Saturdays: Do something productive/guilt-free that you haven’t ever done before.
Sacrificial Sunday: Make a sacrifice to grow with God. Be consistent in an area you aren’t, like being a regular part of a church community or making prayer more personal. Or take a bold step in a new way of worshiping or relating to Him, like finding some new songs to sing out to Him in praise.

Obviously, it's easy to look at those lists and say "THAT ONE!" But again, that's not the point. Lent isn't about finding something religious to do, but using intentional choices to better connect with God. Giving up desserts or your favorite television show is not at the heart of this season, but if giving up something helps you to become more receptive to receiving the gift of deeper life from God, then, by all means, give it up.

Which leads to the true purpose of Lent. It's "emptying ourselves." We need to let go of whatever is clogging up the space God wants to live in our lives. Many of us have allowed random "neutral" things that steal our time (Facebook, gaming, TV, texting, etc) to push out any open space in our lives. Others of us have rebelled on purpose and are taking part in things that turn our hearts and minds away from God.

That's why Lent seems to always track back to Matthew 4 where Jesus fasted for 40 days before beginning His active ministry on earth. During the tail end of that time, the devil tempted Him with some short-cuts to power, fame and prestige. Each time, Jesus gave up those temptations to make space for something better.

I invite you to do that, just as I am and many I know. Whether or not today means "Ash Wednesday" or "Lent" to you, or if it's simply something you've labeled as a "religious activity," let go of your past experiences with this and jump into something amazingly authentic.

"But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that it will not be obvious to men that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." (Jesus, Matthew 6:17-18)

what's the point of prayer - pt 4

2011-03-08T20:33:00.002-05:00

I couldn't imagine a better ending to this series on prayer than something that just happened 15 minutes ago.

The scene: Nighttime prayers.

The player: Daniel, my 7-year old.

The dialogue: "Thank you, God, for making me. And thank you for making my family. And please let this whole school thing be worth it. Amen."

what's the point of prayer - pt 3

2011-03-08T07:41:00.036-05:00

After my first and second post in this series on prayer, we come to one of the most honest questions we ask about prayer.

To sum up…

PART ONE underscores that we can’t control God, be it through prayer or any other means.
PART TWO revealed that God has a Story, knows all things, and is working toward something.

From one vantage point, prayer is an unburdening of sorts. People sometimes pray at bed time to get things off of their chest and out of their head so they can sleep. Others find it helpful to pray a prayer of thankfulness before facing the negative stuff in life because it helps them put things in perspective.

These are great practices, but the Bible reveals prayer can be something even deeper. Namely, that prayer awakens your relationship with God and activates a trust in the Holy Spirit who resides within a born-again Christian. It's extremely catalytic to your life and faith, especially when it feels like your requests and conversation are in step with God.

However, this is also where it gets sticky. God knows all things, which means He knows all things that could be known - past, present, and future - and he knows them all at the same time. He is never surprised from the big picture, and yet is active in the world we are in just as much as we are.

Understanding this before we move on is key, so let me give you a metaphor. Imagine what it would be like to stick your hand in a fishbowl and wiggle your fingers. To the fish, you exist in its world as something it doesn’t understand… so it reacts accordingly. You, however, see the entire fish bowl so no matter where the fish swims you see it (whether or not you move your hand to stay on top of it)

Unlike this example, God isn’t merely playing around in the “water” we live in. His nature causes Him to add life to our life, and prune out what doesn’t belong (see John 15). He knows the names of all 5.7 billion people who call planet earth home, but not as a trivia fact. He knows the names of everyone who has ever lived here and everyone yet to be born, but not as a history lesson. He knows these things because He cares for us, whether your health is in question or finances seem tighter than ever. He feels the angst of those situations, as well as what happens when your crabby boss gets on your case or how you sometimes worry about things you don’t say out loud.

Listen to the words of Psalm 139:1-4.

O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD.

It's a liberating truth for your prayer life, because it means I don’t have to yell or shout to try and make him understand. Sometimes I barely even use words in my prayers, because I know He knows. Repeating myself in a prayer is helpful only for me - He got the message the first time. Actually, he got the message before I ever sent it.

So why pray?

Consider an interview Dan Rather once had with Mother Teresa of Calcutta. Dan asked, "What do you say to God when you pray?"

Teresa answered, "I listen."

Dan, somewhat flustered, countered, "Well, then, what does God say?"

Teresa replied, "He listens." At that point Dan Rather looked totally puzzled, so Teresa added, "If you can't understand that, I can't explain it to you."

God has invited us to bring our needs to Him, but not to seek the answer. Rather, He is most concerned with our relationship with Him and what is happening in us before anything may change in what’s happening to us. We are told to ask, to seek, to knock so the door can be opened (Matthew 7:7-8).

But have you ever asked “The door to what?”

In Psalm 81:10 the Lord promises, “Open wide your mouth and I will fill it.” You can either focus on what your mouth gets filled with, or you can focus on Who is doing the filling and why He’s doing it.

Here’s another problem with our prayers: We don’t know what we really need. We think we do, but we don’t. Or to be more accurate, we know part of our needs, but not all of them. Our perspective is inevitably limited by our own experience, desires and personal knowledge. There may be a legitimate pain that we want relieved in our life or someone else’s, but we aren’t always correct in assuming that is the way things ought to be.

In contrast, Matthew 6:8 plainly declares, “Your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” Yet He desires us to pray so that we can can express our total dependence upon our Heavenly Father.
That’s the big answer, by the way. We pray to merge our sense of the ultimate story with His Story. I pour out my heart before Him not to convince Him of something, but so that I can let Him share His heart with mine and we somehow meet in the middle.

Romans 8:26 says that “We do not know what we ought to pray for.” How true that is. Over the years I’ve begged God for what I thought I wanted, only He held back to give me what I *really* wanted. In one case I got the answer I demanded - it was a dream job that was offered to me. However, I realized and prayed, “God, You’re letting me have this, but I know You are not in it. So I’m going to say no.” In another case it was “God, I want things to work out with this girl,” only they didn’t – and as hard as it was, things shifted in me that prepared me for meeting my amazing wife.

There have been other things God has said “Not now” or “No” to me on that to this day I still don’t understand. This is where prayer again comes back to the relationship, for if I see God as only a genie who runs on my will I won’t trust His answers. Yet if I pray on good days and bad days, I can more authentically come to Him, wrestle with Him and follow Him no matter what the answer is.

Picture a father watching his child trying to put together a puzzle. The kid tries and tries but just can’t get the pieces in the right place. The father watches with great interest, but he doesn’t interfere.

Finally, the child comes over and crawls in his lap and says, “Daddy, would you help me put my puzzle together?” He smiles and bends down and together they begin to pick up each piece. One by one they put the puzzle together.

Why didn’t the father help his daughter earlier? For one thing, there was no ask for help. For another, he wanted his child to learn what it means to try. And most of all, he wanted this to be a two-way thing, and not just him imposing his will on his child.

Is this not a picture of how our Father deals with His children? Although He longs to come to our aid, often He waits until we specifically ask Him. Sometimes He wants us to come to the end of our own pitiful resources before He intervenes. When we cry out in despair, He is honored as we express our complete dependence upon Him (not out of ego, but because that is actually how it is whether we admit it or not). And there are times when He says, “I have to say no to this one, or at least ‘Not yet,’ because I am saying ‘Yes’ to something greater you can’t yet see.”

This is where it gets tricky, because we all know from personal experience that not all our aks of a parent are answered the first time we pray them… and the same can be true of God. Jesus tells a story about a persistent widow who wears down a judge through constant asks, and Christ compares that to how we are to pray. Sometimes we receive immediate answers, but often we must wait days, weeks, months, or even years before the answer comes. This isn’t because God is playing a game with us (although it may seem like it), but because timing matters.

Practically, how long should you pray for something God-honoring? Apparently the answer is pray until God answers your prayers.

But don’t seek the answer… seek God through your questions.

He may be waiting to release something into your life, but you need to first become someone who can handle the answer appropriately. A human father doesn’t give car keys to a toddler… so make sure you are growing in your faith.

Again, back to the parable of the persistent widow, Jesus says: “And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly.” (Luke 18:7-8).

James 5:16 says “The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.” In the original language James used a word that means “to boil over.” Fervent prayers get God’s attention because they come from a heart that believes God’s power is unlimited.

Remember, He is God and we are not.

So why pray? Outside of everything that’s already been shared, here’s one more thought… God has commanded us to pray, which means that prayer must be good for us. He doesn't need us to do this to know anything, but by praying we begin to know more... and know Him more.

Prayer sometimes changes things, but it always changes us.

And that just might be one of the greatest reasons to pray, outside of crawling up onto the lap of our Father and figuring out the puzzle of life together.

just me and my son

2011-03-03T22:36:00.000-05:00

Spent the day traveling with Joshua to Chicago where I am a guest at a conference. Thought it might be fun for us to bond at this level, and it certainly has been.

The best part has been I've watched my 9-year old son (just two days away from being 10) make some amazing choices today. I could see him wrestle with it... and then own the decision that lived in the larger God-sized Story, versus the small one that would merely make him happy.

I love this kid, whether or not he keeps up this pattern... but I pray he does.

what's the point of prayer - pt 2

2011-02-21T15:00:00.154-05:00

A few days ago I began answering a question that many of us wonder from time to time. Essentially, what's the point of prayer? Be sure to read PART ONE before taking in this next piece, for it underscores that we can’t control God, be it through prayer or any other means.

So what is the point of prayer then?

Have you ever noticed how when some movies come out everyone seems to get into them right away, only you don't manage to jump on board until much later?

I can think of a handful of flicks where this was the case for me. When Home Alone came out, I was already sick of it before even seeing it. Everyone kept telling me, "You have to see this movie! This Culkin kid is hilarious!" I even had a friend drag me to see it, promising he'd pay for my ticket because it was just that important.

Of course, I hated the movie. I had seen most of the slapstick scenes in the previews that were endlessly run on television, and all the stories I'd heard about the plot and scenes from friends. Any attempt to make me enjoy this movie was impossible, because I was already shut off to it.

That is, until I had a son.

The movie happened to be on TV in the background while I was working on my laptop, and I saw the young Kevin McAlister really missing his family. I suddenly found myself watching Home Alone differently... not for the comedy, but for the family piece. That dang Culkin kid even made me cry at the end.

With me so far?

It happened again when I moved to Ohio some years back. I had TBS on, and it was playing its usual round of repeats. Without realizing it, I began passively watching Tommy Boy - a Chris Farley/David Spade flick that was met with much laughter when it first came out. I can't remember when I first saw it, but it struck me as "humorous" at the time. Nothing about it grabbed me, but it made me laugh.

Only this time I heard words that never had meaning for me before. Things like "Sandusky," and "Cuyahoga Falls." These were cities in Ohio, and because of my new context I saw the movie much differently. The movie no longer took place in a world I merely heard about as a part of a plot, but I realized that the plot actually involved my world.

Now...

I'm not sure why you pray.

For many, prayer is something we do in order to get something. Its can become a deal-making moment, such as "God, if you do this for me, I'll really shape up. I'll stop being a lazy religious person. I'll even go to church some more." Of course, we usually don't really mean those things... but it sounds good. We wonder if we can fake God out into giving us something, all so that we can withdraw and say, "Ha! You didn't read the fine print. I'm a liar, including when it comes to how important I say my faith is. You should have known that, God."

For others, prayer is an expression of a real relationship you have with God, and is your way of asking Him to do things you think He might want to do. We may pray, "God, please heal this person I love who is sick," or "Lord, I need some money so that I can take care of my family." Those sound like reasonable prayers, and (as I shared in the last post) we may have good reason to do these things. After all, it seemed like in some moments in the Bible God acted on requests like this after His people prayed.

Those moments are true, and yet while they happened we may be misreading those pieces of His Story a bit.

That's just it, by the way... it's His Story. Our stories are scenes in His movie... it's not the other way around. Think about it this way - "Who is the Author, and who is the pen?"

On the surface, that doesn't sound like a fun question because we already know the answer. Simply put, if God exists then He is God... and we aren't. Our agenda for life isn't as important as we think it is, and we need to at some point get honest with that. That either leads to trusting your life to God, or rebelling against the very idea.

But when we do trust the entire direction and every detail of our life to Jesus Christ, we occasionally hear God say something profound.

Like... "Sandusky."

Or... "Cuyahoga Falls."

(Insert your city name here: ________________)

And we begin to realize that what seemed irrelevant to our lives is actually quite relevant. Practically speaking, prayer brings us into this awareness... and this is what all of this means:

We don't pray to inform God of anything.

Psalm 147:4 says, "He determines the number of the stars and calls them each by name." Ponder what that means - billions and billions of stars, and He knows the identity and purpose of each one. I barely can remember the name of the last person I shook hands with.
Matthew 6:8 says, "Your Father knows what you need before you ask him." What a liberating truth, for nothing you can do or say is a surprise to God. He knows your secret thoughts, your hidden motives, your unspoken dreams, and He knows what you are going to say before you ever open your mouth.

We pray to let God's Story and our story merge together.

Proverbs 3:5 says, "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." When we pray, we remember that there is something greater happening than the moment we are in. We may not know what it is, nor how it will turn out... but by turning to God we recognize that He is God. That's something we often forget when we see how much we influence the world by our own efforts... prayer puts things into a much larger perspective.
Matthew 6:10 says, "your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven." As we seek God through a specific burden, we're reminded that the way things are aren't the way they were created to be... and we have the chance to be a part of God revealing the Good News of His Kingdom through our lives.

That is another huge foundational piece, which when combined with the last post brings us to the final question: If God has a Story, and knows all things, and is working toward something, then why does He encourage me to talk to Him about my requests?

That's part 3. I'll write more on this later in the week.

what's the point of prayer - pt 1

2011-02-18T17:29:00.005-05:00

I received this great question by a member of our church regarding prayer. I know it's asked by many people, so I'm going to write about this over the next few days. Here's the question:

Tony, would love to talk with you sometime about some things I have been struggling with in my faith. Being a health care professional, I see truly amazing people with heartbreaking diagnosis, and just situations in life that just hurt me. I pray for these people/situations... but sometimes struggle with what I perceive as a lack of response to these prayers. I read in the bible to pray for your concerns and troubles. But what is the point of prayer if it will not change the outcome... for God knows what’s going on, and really don't think he changes his mind just because we ask for it. I'd love to hear your take on this.

This is such an amazing and honest question, and I wish more people would ask it. It’s full of emotions, yet it also wants to understand what the point of prayer is. That’s the real thing we’re trying to figure out when we ask something like this, and the good news is that there is a great answer that can wrap our arms around.

First, though, you’ll need to let go of what prayer has been to you. In this case, you’re describing prayer as the means to get God to do something. I know you know there is more to it than that, but it may be the primary idea you think of when you think of the concept of prayer.

It is that for a lot of people, and seemingly justifiably so. After all, the Bible contains examples where someone prayed to God and suddenly there was a shift in a situation – someone was healed, an oppression was released, or the Lord specifically moved in a way that He hadn’t before the prayer. There are even some Christian circles where it’s taught that whatever you claim “in the name of Jesus” is guaranteed to happen.

Only it doesn’t always work that way. God isn’t a genie, and while we can recognize this we may still treat Him as such in our prayers. We send up our wishes, and He’s “supposed to” grant them. Especially if they’re “good” prayers – like healing someone who is sick.

Independent studies have been done to see if we can gauge if prayer “works” in this way. In one instance, researchers “proved” that prayer doesn’t change anything because situations didn’t change for people who were prayed for any more than they did for others who weren’t prayed for. Another study showed the opposite, though, in that people who were prayed for did have noted improvements and recovery beyond the others.

Depending upon what people believe about God, they are likely to believe only one of those studies and try to discount the other. However, both happened. Which means only one thing.

We can’t control God, be it through prayer or any other means.

So what is the point of prayer then?

That’s part two. I’ll write more on it soon.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." (Isaiah 55:8-11)

woo-hoo!

2011-02-08T12:56:00.000-05:00

Pretty stoked about this - just found out fifteen minutes ago that this is now live on Amazon.com and is being shipped to stores today.

The Miracles Of Jesus: A 30-Day Devotional for Students by Tony Myles and Seth McCoy

this one is a keeper

2011-02-08T03:48:00.003-05:00

I wasn't sure which of my blogs to write this on, but I chose this one since it's more personal than it is professional. I wanted to pour out how much I really enjoyed a great meeting last night with our church leadership team. One of the things that came up were the different strengths and weaknesses we all have that somehow come together to do something great for God.

It got me thinking about this song by Rich Mullins:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZQJL7AKV2k

The lyrics are as follows:

Now the plummer's got a drip in his spigot
The mechanic's got a clank in his car
And the preacher's thinking thoughts that are wicked
And the lover's got a lonely heart
My friends ain't the way I wish they were
They are just the way they are

And I will be my brother's keeper
Not the one who judges him
I won't despise him for his weakness
I won't regard him for his strength
I won't take away his freedom
I will help him learn to stand
And I will ~ I will be my brother's keeper

Now this roof has got a few missing shingles
But at least we got ourselves a roof
And they say that she's a fallen angel
I wonder if she recalls when she last flew
There's no point in pointing fingers
Unless you're pointing to the truth

And I will be my brother's keeper
Not the one who judges him
I won't despise him for his weakness
I won't regard him for his strength
I won't take away his freedom
I will help him learn to stand
And I will ~ I will be my brother's keeper

I will be my brother's keeper
Not the one who judges him
I won't despise him for his weakness
I won't regard him for his strength
I won't take away his freedom
I will help him learn to stand
And I will ~ I will be my brother's keeper

I've been in way too many circles, both inside and outside of churches, where things can become reactionary and petty. Someone gets on someone else's nerves, or everyone tries to avoid tension. Several times last night we wrestled over some great stuff that was full of passion.

I was reminded again, though, through these amazing people how special it is to come back to Jesus. Instead of us drawing lines in the sand, we drew arrows to Him. There's something redeeming about deciding to not give up on one another because we're a part of something way more important than the moment. That's something I hope Connection Church never loses.

I will be my brother's (and sister's) keeper, and hope they'll continue to be mine.

"Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble." (1 Peter 3:8)

a word of hope

2011-01-23T07:08:00.003-05:00

Read this passage this morning - hope it encourages you as well:

For here's what I'm going to do: I'm going to take you out of these countries, gather you from all over, and bring you back to your own land. I'll pour pure water over you and scrub you clean. I'll give you a new heart, put a new spirit in you. I'll remove the stone heart from your body and replace it with a heart that's God-willed, not self-willed. I'll put my Spirit in you and make it possible for you to do what I tell you and live by my commands. You'll once again live in the land I gave your ancestors. You'll be my people! I'll be your God! (Ezekiel 36:23-28, The Message)

apparently there's another writer under my roof

2011-01-12T09:18:00.001-05:00

I got to step back from writing for the newspaper this week.

Turns out there's a much better writer than me with the last name Myles.

Check it out: http://connectionchurch.org/pdfs/MedinaGazette_011211.pdf

(P.S. Yes - he actually wrote this all by himself. He spoke it out loud from his heart without pausing, and I tried to keep up and type it.)

winding up 2010

2011-01-01T00:33:00.001-05:00

On the last day of the year and the first day of the new year, we all seem to reflect on who we've been, who we could be, and where we are now.

For me, 2010 meant taking some uncomfortable steps forward with God that were amazingly well worth it; I got to see my wife become even more beautiful than ever before, inside and out; Joshua became courageous in new ways; Daniel boldly embodied a new streak of generosity in his spirit; Johanna showed us her otherwise beautifully hidden face on July 28, and hasn't stop smiling since.

And then there are you... my "people" - my "family" - my friends, neighbors, and Connection Church family. I love how we've checked each others blind spots and not simply gone the route of the rest of the world to "just be happy," "do what we want without being judged," and all the other bumper sticker ideas that hold more air than substance. We sometimes get distracted by these things, but we have each other to give gentle nudges toward a much thicker and eternal direction.

I can't think of a better representation to all of this than my amazing church community. Connection Church. Without a doubt, we are some of the most imperfect people who somehow together found this perfect 3-D trajectory with Jesus Christ that is more real than anything else in the 2-D world. Yet both of those worlds merge together - you were cheering on my kids when I was dripping with tears during their baptism; I find encouragement every week when I try to write something fresh for the newspaper; we decided the world on the other side of the globe mattered when we sacrificed for Kenya and Haiti together; you roll up your sleeves to feed the poor; you believe that love - the greatest Love of all, that is, God's Love - can truly change the world and are letting that out of you.

2010 was the year we all put our arms around each other, and knelt down to seek something bigger and more authentic than the next thrill or our old way of doing things.

I can't think of a better way to enter into 2011. Happy New Year!

dirty hairy meets rainman

2010-12-17T11:27:00.002-05:00

care for some toast?

2010-12-13T22:41:00.000-05:00

snow day!

2010-12-13T12:21:00.002-05:00

The fun local news is that our town is under a Level 2 snow emergency.

That's big news, baby.

Apparently Level 1 is "Drive carefully," while Level 2 is "Only those who feel it's necessary" to drive should be on the roads. Level 3 mandates everyone be off the roads inside except "non-emergency personnel."

I hear Level 4 involves the use of TNT on all snowmen, and Level 5 hauls anyone into jail who has the last name "Frost."

On the upside, my kiddo's are enjoying a break from school. They just made a Gingerbread House with Katie.

blogging about my boy

2010-12-02T22:26:00.000-05:00

Today I was blessed to spend a portion of the day with my son Daniel, who not only turned 7 today but had a blast doing it.

After waking him up with a family chorus of "Happy Birthday," he came downstairs (beautifully decorated by my lovely wife Katie) where we cranked the Beatles' "Birthday" song (sing along: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ztoSUhbNntQ) and danced around.

Next up, a donut with a candle - because he's not a fan of cake icing. And, of course, even more singing.

Next up - present time! Joshua shared a gift he'd bought for his little brother, and we shared ours with Daniel as well.

He even got a nice present from his grandparents.

Armed with Little Debbie snacks for his class, it was off to school. Later on I had the chance to have lunch with him and his buddy Dylan.

We ended the night doing our Karate class together - and while this little guy can drive me crazy sometimes, I just want to say that I love that kid.. It may have been a stretch in my schedule to spend some extended time with him today, yet I was so thankful I did.

Happy 7th birthday buddy. Daddy loves you.

Although I guess now it's "Dad."

the computer age?

2010-11-17T16:46:00.000-05:00

I saw this and wanted to pass along some of the signs we are definitely living in a computer age. Enjoy! :)

google, droids, and a link to click

2010-11-12T00:37:00.000-05:00

Here's a quick pic to crack a smile... especially for Star Wars fans.

Meanwhile, I don't mean to self-promote, but could you please click on my article "How to Create A Sermon" (I believe it's a good read and every click supports my ability to keep writing - thanks!)

a few questions I'm asking

2010-11-10T00:24:00.011-05:00

I wrote a heavy and honest letter about two weeks ago that I shared with my church family on Sunday. It's been sitting on my blog in "draft" form since then, and there have been several days when my mouse cursor has hovered over the "publish" button.

I've been praying about whether or not that letter belongs online, and have discerned that for the time being it does not. There are some whom I need to send it to, and I will... but in the meantime I'm going to share only a slice of it below.

What you'll see are some questions I'm asking of myself, as I intended myself to be a recipient of the letter as well as all my friends all around the world who proclaim a "changed life" due to a relationship with Jesus Christ.

Perhaps I should start by admitting that I'm feeling a bit worn down. I've been plugging away at some pretty important things lately while trying to keep my main priorities my main priorities: God, Katie, kids, and everyone/everything else. There’s also a new baby in our house... and where there have been extra pockets of time beyond the extra hours I already put into work, I'm also writing two books I've been contracted for as well as many freelance projects that I'm hoping will help pay some medical bills we don't want to overwhelm us.

Again, I share all of that for context. I’m a hard-working person, just like I assume you are.

In the midst of all of that, I keep stepping up to bat as best as I know how in the attempt to make a real difference in life with and for Jesus Christ.

As an individual, I am asking, "God, what are my blind spots? What is my next step with you? Do you want me to stretch in a new way or simply enjoy You today? Do I really need to do what you've asked... because it's tough - not that I don't want to, but it's tough."
As a husband, I am pondering, "What am I to do with the last significant conversations I've had with Katie? How do I serve her more when some days I'd rather be selfish? Am I treasuring the gift she is or taking advantage of the idea that she'll 'always be around'?"
As a dad, I am wondering, "Do each of my kids have an individual relationship with me that that we both feel good about? How can I say 'YES!' more often when they want to do something with me (without neglecting my other responsibilities)? Am I aware of what they're going through positively and negatively... and am I a part of guiding them or am I neglecting them in some way?"
As a pastor, I am saying, "Tony, pretend this is the last sermon you will ever preach this week... how are you going to be responsible with that opportunity? And are you living in the big picture and the details of your church community with a healthy balance? You can't do it all and solve everyone's problem - you're not God. Are you, though, attempting to advance down the field with the ball God has handed you or letting it fumble on purpose? And have you started relying on your abilities instead of the Lord?"
As a friend/neighbor/relative, I am considering, "When I say I am someone's friend, do they know it in how I live? What are my neighbors going through that I can be a support to? How is my extended family these days and is there any role I play in their lives? Who will I share Jesus with next?"

All of this is simply being asked to put Christ-first in my life and help others to do the same.

I'm taking a break from Facebook

2010-10-28T13:37:00.012-04:00

I'm taking a break from Facebook.

Not because it's evil, and not for reasons I'm going to go into right now. I'll explain more sometime later.

For those of you who know me well, you'll know this is a big break from my routine. I started my hiatus today and I've already "almost clicked" to visit Facebook several times. I'm used to using it as way to let the relational part of my brain breathe when the deep side needs a break.

I also enjoy how Facebook helps me to keep up with my friends and family a bit more throughout the week. Sometimes it helps to have that little bit of information to stay in the mix.

But for the reasons I'm doing this, it's a trade-off I'm willing to endure.

You know... it feels good to intentionally upset the routine of my life.

baby talk: a reminder

2010-10-18T10:53:00.001-04:00

Just in case anyone else needed a reminder on what is and isn't appropriate care with babies.

the sweetest days (every day)

2010-10-16T20:34:00.000-04:00

Back in the day, I used to drive hours and hours to see my girlfriend who was at college. Our time was limited, as I stayed with some buddies in a campus apartment and she was in a dorm with a curfew. Once, though, I tried to maximize our Saturday which happened to fall on Sweetest Day by ordering a pizza.

I know... may not sound too romantic. Except I'd prearranged the pepperoni to appear in the shape of a heart.

Yep... classy romance on a budget.

Today that same girlfriend - now my bride - surprised me with a pizza night. And as you may imagine, the trend continues.

I'm not one to fall for Hallmark holidays, but I am one for enjoying, savoring and investing into the things that really matter. Right after God, my wife is next.

Happy Sweetest Day, babe... a.k.a. "every day."

Jason Mraz - Lucky (feat. Colbie Caillat) (Saturday Night Live) (live) (2009)

will this news blurb read the same way in fifty years?

2010-10-13T06:19:00.001-04:00

I came across a news blurb that is newsworthy in itself. It got me wondering, though, if in the next fifty years its content will read and impact us any differently than it might today.

Think about it - that's five more decades of us attempting to relabel the definition of love, marriage, civil rights in relationships and so on.

What do you think - would the following hit us any differently?

The North American Man/Boy Love Association is being scrubbed from Facebook after Fox News purportedly alerted the social networking site to the group's pages there. Fox reporter Jana Winter writes, "Despite Facebook's policy against the posting of content that supports groups engaged in child exploitation, foxnews.com easily found dozens of pages proudly proclaiming an affiliation with the North American Man/Boy Love Association. Many of those pages featured numerous photos of unnamed boys, who appeared to be around 4 years old."[foxnews.com, 9/29/10]

"Of course not," you may say. "We'll still feel the same way in fifty years that we feel about this today."

Are you sure? After all, what once was "offensive" or "perverted" fifty years ago is now the plot line of our favorite television shows.

The reality is that the standards never changed... but unfortunately we did and therefore believe they have.

maximizing audio through a church sound booth

2010-10-01T19:11:00.000-04:00

Do you work in church ministry? Ever wondered how to maximize your presentations on an audio level?

Check out this article I wrote on church sound booths when you get a chance.

reflecting on a reflection of my birthday

2010-10-01T09:54:00.031-04:00

So... my birthday was this week. And normally I spend a moment or two reflecting on it. At times I even log my day, which I could easily do here - from the special breakfast and singing I woke up to, the lunch I enjoyed at B.D.'s Mongolian BBQ with my ladies, or the big lasagna dinner I was treated to. Then there are the presents - my favorite candy from my youngest son; new clothes from my wife and daughter; or the gift my oldest song bought with his own allowance to replace something of mine he had a responsibility in accidentally breaking a couple weeks ago.

Rather than itemize all of that and write a paragraph about each one, I'd rather focus on this picture. As you can tell, everyone is looking at the camera that my lovely wife is holding. We're all smiles, too, as if that moment is truly one of the best moments of our lives. I couldn't agree more... and each candle on the cake reminds me of the gift that my kids are to me. In hindsight I should have asked to throw one more on there to represent Katie, but again - the smiles on all our faces and absolutely content spirits capture the honesty of our relationship with each other.

I know that many household don't get to enjoy this - sometimes people pass by each other in the house like co-workers versus family. So other than building our marriage and home on God, I'm not sure what Katie and I have done "right" to somehow end up here - with this picture. A piece of that has involved getting beaten down by life and realizing what's important... but another piece, I think, has been savoring each other and what Jesus Christ has blessed our life with.

So I'm going to praise God for another year of life... and pray that the joy contained in this rectangle only amplifies with age.

a nice alternative to the school cafeteria

2010-09-23T12:38:00.002-04:00

On the beaches of Lake Michigan... Taco Bell plus my two favorite guys in the whole world.

the usefulness of giving up something useless

2010-09-17T00:59:00.001-04:00

I just realized that I didn't watch a show tonight I normally would watch. Meaning, I used to record it and watch it later in the evening when the kids were in bed. You know, because of "some of those jokes" in the show.

Only as I was setting up my shows to record this season I had this internal conviction (Holy Spirit?) that I'd felt last spring when the show ended. Namely, that the values in this show ran against the grain of what I value... and I was compromising because it was "hilarious."

Rather than avoid that reality, I've chosen to face it.

And the funny thing is... I don't miss that show at all.

And it turns out I actually feel more consistent than I did before. At least, in this moment. I'm by no means perfect in this, and hypocrisy on some level may be unavoidable (because we are all on some level imperfect).

But what can't be avoided is the choice we have to be hypocritical on purpose... or not.

Notice that I haven't shared what the show is. It's irrelevant... because I'm not asking you to adopt my values. Rather, I challenge you to be faithful to the ones you say you maintain. Especially if you are a Christ-follower.

I mean, if you are... and I am... shouldn't you and I follow Christ in all things? Including entertainment?

Or not?

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." (Philippians 4:8)

WOO-HOO! Daniel nails riding a two-wheeler!

2010-09-14T21:39:00.000-04:00

I have so much to say about this, but I'll simplify it down to two things:

1) I almost didn't do this tonight with my son... I was a bit worn out and felt like collapsing on the couch instead.

2) I didn't collapse on the couch, because I'm imperfectly opting for an "upside-down funnel life" - so WOO-HOO!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TCsvSHmAf_E

I spotted something familiar in the bookstore

2010-09-10T15:42:00.003-04:00

So geeked. I was in the bookstore and found something I had the chance to be a part of. My name isn't on the cover, but a good portion of this new book involves some of my words (due to some ghost writing I do on the side). I happened upon it in the bookstore today.

Personally speaking, I really like how this project turned out... Chris is a great friend and solid thinker, and I'd encourage you to pick it up if you want something practical to help you sort out your faith. All ages can get something out of this, from teens on up.

Clear: 8 Lessons on the Theological Foundations of Faith

first week of public school - retrospective

2010-08-29T15:02:00.005-04:00

I'm not going to lie... I've been a bit of a mess this week.

Nothing that I can't bounce back from, but for the first time in my family's life we've sent our boys off to school instead of investing into them at home.

Of course, this has garnered three reactions:

From some friends who home school: "Why in the world would you do that?"
From some friends who use public school: "Why in the world did it take you so long?"
From some friends who know us well: "Wow... I get it, and I get how different that will be for you... and I'm praying for you."

That's about all I'm going to say about that.

After all, we may end up using home schooling again down the road... or we may not. Our journey is a very interactive one, which involves leaning into our kids and trying to figure out what will bless them best. Keep in mind, our goal isn't that they would just graduate high school but that they would graduate college as well. In order for that to happen best, Katie and I recognized the need for them to be under different authority that is independent of us.

So for at least this year - maybe more - this is our plan. We'll keep praying for wisdom.

In the meantime, I apologize for being a bit out of sorts this week. Since I work out of the home, it's been odd to have several hours in my day where I don't hear my boys playing, wrestling, singing, or asking me to play a game with them. It's one reason we're driving them to and from school, trying to squeeze every minute of the day with them that we can.

If you happen to be one of the people praying for us in this journey, thank you.

first day of school

2010-08-26T23:13:00.002-04:00

It was the night before the first day of school.

Daniel sat at his desk, thankful to learn he'd be right across the way from his buddy Dylan.

Joshua learned he'd be making new friends this year, including "Nathanial," "Joseph," and "Austin" (who apparently didn't realize it was supposed to be the Old Testament name club).

Although Joshua was pretty stoked about the new school computer lab.

Before we knew it, it was the first day of school... which began with a yummy homemade breakfast by their mom.

Of course, we had to snap some pics of them... because they looked ready to conquer the world. Or at least, 1st grade and 4th grade.

Then it was off to school... one of the hardest things Katie and I have ever had to do. Which is why we cranked up some music to enjoy all together (and to hold back the tears).

The infamous drop off happened quicker than we wanted it to.

And then several hours later... too many, in fact... it was time for the pick up.

They had a great day... a few hurdles, but a solid day nonetheless. We checked them out, and they were still each in one piece.

At the beginning of the day we gave them two goals:

Love God: Honor Him by honoring the authority/teachers over you.
Love others: Try to make a friendship with at least two new people and learn some things about them.

They nailed it, and so we celebrated with some Dairy Queen...

And... um... yeah...Katie and I.... kind of... had some, too. :)

looking up at the lights above

2010-08-12T23:12:00.000-04:00

I know these pictures are a bit blurry and odd looking, but it comes from just an hour ago as my boys and I were on the trampoline looking up at the night sky. We caught a few instances of the meteor shower tonight... lots of fun, and great memories.

At the end I said, "Hey I have my camera phone with me - let me snap a picture of us."

Joshua asked, "Dad, it's too dark."

"No worries - I have a flash on my camera," I added.

This is the first one I tried to take - and it's incredibly blurry because as soon as the flash hit our faces we all winced (including my hand, which shook while holding the camera - hence the blur).

We all laughed hard... which of course led to, "Again! Again!"

This time we prepared ourselves... I even managed to hold the camera still.

Again - uncontrollable pain. Again - uncontrollable laughter.

All of us chanted: "AGAIN! AGAIN!! AGAIN!!!"

"Okay, here we go - one more time," I said.

As you can tell, the "winner" is Daniel (on the left) who after the picture with the biggest smile yelled out, "I survived! I SURVIVED!"

best/worst: the wave

2010-08-06T21:41:00.004-04:00

Best part about doing the wave: Getting it successfully going.

Worst part about doing the wave: Doing the wave.

today's newspaper article... and my favorite response so far

2010-08-04T10:06:00.005-04:00

Something I
wrote in my
newspaper column
this week:

To The Young Man Who Wants To Marry My Daughter

My favorite reader's email so far is this one:

I AM A 96 YEAR OLD LADY WHO ENJOYS GOOD READING. I LIVE ALONE --MY SONS ARE SR CITIZENS--MARRIED--SO I HAVE NO ONE TO SEND YOUR WONDERFUL LETTER TO. BUT I HOPE MANY GUYS WILL READ YOUR LETTER. IT IS THE BEST I HAVE EVER SEEN--THANK YOU FOR YOUR WORK.

SINCERELY... CATHERINE

My daughter's first trip to the mall

2010-08-02T14:49:00.001-04:00

My daughter's first trip to the mall

This message was sent using the Picture and Video Messaging service from Verizon Wireless!

To learn how you can snap pictures and capture videos with your wireless phone visit www.verizonwireless.com/picture.

Note: To play video messages sent to email, QuickTime� 6.5 or higher is required.

baby talk: my little girl

2010-07-29T11:53:00.000-04:00

Please join us in welcoming the newest member of our church family, Johanna Katelynn Faith Myles!

My wife tells me people want to know stats... so here you go:

Born 7lb, 6 oz, 20 inches on 7/28/10 @ 11:08pm.

(Personally, I think only women care about these details so they can compare who had a harder pregnancy. All I know is that she is healthy and absolutely beautiful).

Big brothers Joshua and Daniel greeted her with flowers and tender kisses (and Katie and I are quite smitten as well).

I know other people have said in the past that they have the most beautiful girl in the world. Maybe that was true then... but my little Johanna Katelynn Faith Myles has left them all behind. The end. :)

Johanna Katelynn Faith Myles

a one in a million(aire) opportunity - pt 2

2010-07-28T07:02:00.000-04:00

After getting my audition/call-back pass and application for "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire," I had three hours to figure out the answers to some intriguing personal questions.

Quirks, rituals, superstitions... what makes you unique?
How would winning $1 million change your life?
What is one thing you do that makes people laugh?
If you could nominate yourself as "best _____" or "most likely to ______" what would be your vote?
What do you do for fun?
You'd never believe it, but I once...
Why do you want to be on Millionaire?
How did you hear about the audition?

Of course, these are more than questions... this is their way of figuring out if you're a genius who rubs people the wrong way or if you're a smart person who'd actually be fun to watch on TV.

There was another set of questions as well... these were more movie focused:

Is there any movie that you're obsessed with? How many times have you seen it?
How large is your movie collection? How many movies do you see a year?
What are your 3 favorite movie memories and why are they your favorite?
Do you have any friends, relatives, or pets that are named after a movie character?
Do you have a home theater? How much money have you spent to enhance your movie experience?
Do you own or collect any movie memorabilia? What is the most you have spent on an item?
Have you ever missed work or an important event to go see a movie?
What do you love about movies?
What makes you the perfect contestant for the movie trivia shows?

I knew I'd need to concentrate, so instead of sitting in a corner of the hallway I ended up heading out to a local "Subway" restaurant, grabbing some lunch, and filling out the application there on a hard table. Sometimes these little things can help a person to think clearly. It also afforded me the chance to use the internet and phone to brainstorm some good answers to the questions... my wife had some great insights on potential responses.

By this point I had some time to kill, so I walked around the West Side Market in Cleveland. If you've never been there before, it's an enclosed farmer's market and specialty shop area that includes over 100 different vendors from a variety of ethnic backgrounds. These are the guys who stop you as you walk by with invitations like, "Come here, my friend. Taste this fruit - it's the BEST melon you will ever have in your life. The BEST!"

By the time I made it back to my callback, a number of people were returning as well. I somehow managed to get to the front of the line, though, as not too many people considered that where we were waiting would become a line as soon as they opened the doors. This allowed me to get in and out quickly, helping me get home after an already full day.

But the audition itself went great - a gentleman called me over and asked me some questions based on my application. I could see him reading me - judging my every expression and non-expression. My new friend Steve who had made it through as well had remarked to me that he was concerned about "being" the "right person" who would get picked - saying, "If they want me to be funny, I can be funny. If they want me to be smart, I can be smart. I hate it that I don't know what they want."

I opted to be myself. I don't think I faked my way through any of the interview, but simply had a great conversation and made that my only goal. As it ended, the gentleman shook my hand and gave me a warm look back as he said, "The way it works is that everyone gets a postcard in the mail in the next couple of weeks telling you where we're at in our process. I think you did great, by the way."

So... we'll see. :)

One of my favorite parts of the day was that Steve decided to wait for me to touch base. I'll tell you what - if all I win out of this is a new friendship, that was awesome in itself.

By the way - one of my answers to the questions above - "How would winning $1 million change your life?"

My response, and it's honest:

I'm hoping it would change other people's lives versus just my household. We'd be looking for ways to share it. But we would pay off our house and set up college accounts for our kids. That, and we'd start buying the "deluxe" version of macaroni and cheese instead of the usual normal brand. :)

conversations with my kids: hawaiian punch

2010-07-27T22:49:00.000-04:00

The scene: "Deals" Dollar Store as we're waiting in line.

Joshua: "Oh! Hawaiian Punch! Mom, can we get some?"

Katie: "Read the ingredients."

Joshua: (pauses, devises plan) "Um... yummy stuff, yummy stuff, and yummy stuff."

Laughter ensues in the store.

a few words for something I have no words for

2010-07-26T16:34:00.001-04:00

God... you surprised me yet again.

Thanks for being much bigger than any human brain can comprehend...

for the times You say no,

the times You yes,

and the times You say, "I'm about to blow you away with something amazing."

I love You... thanks for loving me in tangible ways.

Help me to squint to see even more of them.

a dedication to my daughter... whose face I have yet to see

2010-07-25T23:18:00.001-04:00

A dedication to my daughter... whose face I have yet to see.

http://www.muzu.tv/michaelbuble/home-music-video/229189

Michael Buble - Just Havent Met You Yet

feeling the (t)-pain

2010-07-23T16:30:00.002-04:00

Look what came with the loaner car my mechanic gave me.

Sweet! It's the one I was missing in my extensive T-PAIN collection.

give me a break

2010-07-21T22:16:00.002-04:00

Twice today I accidentally drove with the 'emergency brake' on.

It's time we rename that thing 'lever you pull that does nothing unless you're already stopped.'

conversations with my kids: video games

2010-07-19T13:43:00.000-04:00

Joshua: "There are only two people I know who are better than me at video games."

Me: "Like me?"

Joshua: "No."

Me: (inside my head - "Listen, buster... I'm the one who gets you past levels you can't conquer. And for that matter, I played PONG on a controller that only twisted left or right... and you couldn't hit pause when mom called you to dinner! You had to line it up with your brother to bounce back and forth and pray you finished eating before he did so you could run downstairs and get the point before him.")

Me: (out loud) "Ah."

Daniel (interrupting): "Dad, I'll let you win the next time you play me."

Joshua: "Anyway, I think that Mark and Brandon are like ultimate pros at video games."

By the way... those are two neighbor boys around their age.

By the way... I love my family.

a one in a million(aire) opportunity - pt 1

2010-07-17T22:10:00.002-04:00

Let me begin with a confession... it's always been a dream of mine to be on a game show. On one hand, it disgusts me to realize how much pop culture knowledge I am filled with. On the other hand, maybe some of that knowledge can actually be used for something productive.

On Wednesday morning I took a tangible step in that direction.

The TV show "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" held open auditions in the Cleveland area this past week. It was a "first come, first serve" audition, which meant there was no guarantee you'd get in without an early spot in line. I left my house at 4:30am to stand in a line that wouldn't start moving until 6am.

Then again, it was a beautiful morning and I was on the dock. So who am I to complain?

When it did move, though, they brought us into an outdoor pavilion area and sat everyone down. Best guess is that there were around 700 people there, from those who seemed focused to others who just enjoyed hamming up every so often to keep the mood light. They even gave us all bathroom breaks by section... how nice!

Next, we were each handed a magnet that had a number written on the back to designate where we were at in line. I was "213" - which placed me right in between two guys who I ended up striking a conversational friendship with. Noah (#212) happened to be an author and itinerant speaker, whereas Steve (#214) was a local broker.

Over time we each shared a bit about our backgrounds, which for Steve included him having auditioned for the show in New York. He even voluntarily tossed out a few of the questions my way to prepare for, just in case they'd be on the test again.

Which President is on the right side of Mt Rushmore?
How do you accurately spell this word: "kwestionair?"
What movie did George Clooney gain weight for?
What country is _____ river located in?" (I forgot the name of it already - sorry)

Unfortunately for Steve and I, none of these questions were on the Cleveland test.

What was challenging about the experience was that the show's representatives didn't have a sound system. So whenever they would try to talk to the large crowd of 700+ people they would be continually interrupted by the masses saying, "WE CAN'T HEAR YOU!" Of course, I could hear them fine until those other folks said they couldn't... which was odd since they were in front of me. Nonetheless, that was a struggle a couple of times during the day.

So we were ushered upstairs into a large ballroom where we sat down on chairs that barely gave any elbow room. Thankfully I was a few chairs down from the end and Steve caught on to move his chair down a bit. This would eventually help in the test taking, not only from a concentration standpoint but also to keep others from cheating (which it actually would have been easy to do, although I didn't see it happen).

A young woman from the show guided us through our initial steps - we'd be given ten minutes to answer 30 questions on the first test, then a second test would ask us another 30 questions that we'd also only have ten minutes to answer. Both were standard "Scantron" sheets, and we were all given a "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" pencil and a piece of hard cardboard.

Some of the easy questions of the first test I nailed included:

What was the profession of Michael Clayton in the 2007 movie?
Which of these is more money - four rolls of pennies, five rolls of dimes, ten rolls of nickels, etc.
What is the old time nickname that the New York Times is known for?
Name the TV show George Costanza's answering machine parodied on Seinfeld.
On "In Living Color," what was Homey the Clown's catchphrase?

Some of the other questions I didn't nail off the first test included this genre: "Put these birth stones in order, according to which month comes first..." That's where you burn a lot of time - trying to recall information you once may have known but no longer do. At least a third of the test was a challenge in this way.

The second test was much easier - it was primarily movie themed and covered every genre from The Maltese Falcon to Jurassic Park. A few questions were "trick" questions - like "What movie did actor Bill Paxton not die in?" and they gave you four movies where people were known for dying. I dare say that I only missed one question on that second test.

After all of this, we had to wait around a half hour for the results to come back. During this time, the ballroom became a chaotic rendition of "America's Got Talent" - only, it was the non-talent version. I apologize for how that sounds, but people were doing anything to win a t-shirt... and I heard some of the flattest jokes I've heard in a long time. It gave Steve great sideline comfort in his chances to move forward as he watched it all unfold.

Although... I did score a t-shirt (and later several more) by helping toss them out to the people.

Finally, the big moment came. They announced who made it out of the large group by name, and when all was said and done around 8% of were called back. The comments made by many people after this included, "This was the biggest waste of time in my entire life." Meanwhile, I was feeling pretty good... as was Steve who also was called back as well.

We made our way up to the front, were handed application forms, took pictures with our number and name, and then were told to come back three hours later for our audition.

Three hours later? Application form? Audition?

(click here for Part 2)

our community on our community - pt 1

2010-07-07T10:23:00.004-04:00

This week's newspaper article is online, beginning a new series all this month called "Our Community On Our Community." What insights do everyday people have to offer us that we may otherwise skip over because it's not our usual vantage point?

Check it out here: http://connectionchurch.org/tonymyles/

You can also read a great post from Aadvantage Cab here: http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=141981475812993

like it or not, we should talk about this

2010-07-07T01:24:00.000-04:00

I like to look at the undercurrent beneath trends, from why LOST was so popular a series to what drives people to enjoy comic books and vampires.

Someone shared with me this rather intriguing article on the Twilight saga in the L.A. Times.

http://articles.latimes.com/2010/jun/27/entertainment/la-ca-twilight-addiction-20100627

Pay special attention to the comments and situation on page three.

And the spirit of the closing thought on page four as well.

In light of all of that, what are your thoughts on the trend mentioned in this story?

No... really. I mean it. And I mean no disrespect in asking.

What are your thoughts?

Or perhaps a better question... why are those your thoughts?

it must be the fumes

2010-07-03T23:57:00.000-04:00

Pulled up to a gas pump with a sign that apologetically read, "out of premium."

I can't help but imagine the kind of life I'd be living if that mattered to me.

father's day - pt 2 (recap)

2010-06-25T06:33:00.001-04:00

This past Sunday was Father's Day, which was an amazing day in our home for many reasons.

It actually started about a week before when we were leaving the warehouse that our church gathers in every Sunday morning. Since we don't use an old traditional building, the multi-purpose function to our room works in our favor most weeks. Occasionally, though, there's a hurdle... like filling up a swimming pool for a baptism. It usually begins the week before that special celebration is scheduled so that we can turn the very cold water into warm water.

Which... um... hardly ever happens.

Needless to say, another piece of the puzzle is that my family is often one of the last to leave on a Sunday. So a week ago as my boys were taking note of all that was happening to set up the pool, my youngest son, Daniel, said something to the effect of, "Mom, Dad... I'm ready to be baptized."

Keep in mind, he's six years old. And while we did dedicate him as a baby (different than baptism), we always wanted to honor what baptism is on a biblical level... namely, it's something that each person needs to choose.

So we told him we'd talk about it that day at lunch. Mainly, I thought, because he's "too young" and "couldn't possibly understand the meaning of baptism." My plan was to find a way to delay this until later on.

Later that day, I asked him why he wanted to baptized. His answer essentially was, "Well, I love God. And I don't want to do anything that is going to stop Him from being first to me. So I want to be baptized because I know it honors Him."

Huh. That was a pretty good answer.

I then asked him about his understanding of what baptism meant. Namely, why we go under the water and come up. At first he didn't understand the question, but then he answered, "Oh, yeah. When you go under it reminds us of Jesus' death. And when you come up it reminds us that Jesus is alive." We also talked about how when we take part in baptism we claim that over our own life as well.

Huh... again... another solid response.

The more we talked, the more it became clear that he "gets it." And I mean that in the most personal way possible... he doesn't just do what I do in my faith, but truly has found a faith of his own. The way he sees things inspires me - and I am blown away by the conviction in his heart. I seriously need him to teach me more about God, because Daniel sees something Divine that many of us have forgotten.

When I asked him if he has any questions about baptism, he said, "Well, I have one... can I wear goggles in the pool?"

Nice.

So on Father's Day, I was treated to some of the usual great gifts by my family. Breakfast in bed, a couple of gifts that expanded my simple wardrobe, and so on.

But the greatest gift....

it makes me tear up even writing about it...

was when my son Daniel stepped up in front of people of all ages...

shared about his faith in Jesus Christ and let me pray over him...

then got into a pool with me...

where we, together, enjoyed the moment...

and celebrated the eternal life that exists within this little guy...

and the way it leaks out of him in the ways he loves God and others...

by taking part in something ancient, eternal, and present-day all in one dip...

that symbolized the amazing Love of God the Father Himself.

Now, I know we can still debate that Daniel is "too young" and "couldn't possibly understand the meaning of baptism."

Then again, who among us could that not be said about? Truly, wouldn't one more year in your faith make you more "experienced?"

But is that's the point of baptism?

I'm not going to argue with you, because you can't win.

All I can tell you is that after talking with my son there came a point when I realized that I would be sinning if I kept him from expressing his understanding of his relationship with God. Undoubtedly, my wife and I have given him the ingredients... but Daniel has created something unique out of them that has allowed him to taste and see that the Lord is good.

There were several others who were baptized on Sunday, and I don't mean to share this one story at their expense. It's a rather amazing thing to watch intangible life change be tangibly celebrated in front of you.

But man... seriously... I couldn't think of a better way to celebrate Father's Day than by sharing it with my Father, who... as it turns out... just so happens to be my son's Father, too.

Maybe that's why they call it "the faith of a child."

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." (Matthew 19:14)

dragons and yogurt

2010-06-24T17:56:00.004-04:00

Me: Daniel, do dragons eat yogurt?

Daniel: Well... THIS one does!

perspective about your perspective

2010-06-24T17:56:00.002-04:00

Consider this story about a shipwreck.

When the sole survivor reached a small, uninhabited island, he prayed for God to rescue him, but help didn't come as he asked. Eventually he built a hut out of driftwood for protection from the elements.

Days passed, then one day he returned from scavenging for food and found his hut in flames, the smoke rising into the sky. Angrily he cried,

"God, how could You do this to me?" In exhaustion, he fell to the ground and collapsed into sleep.

The next morning he was awakened by rescuers.

"How did you know I was here?" he asked.

"We saw your smoke signal," they replied.

trailer: the voyage of the dawn treader

2010-06-24T14:02:00.000-04:00

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader hits theaters on December 10, and you can watch the film’s first trailer below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrJQDPpIK6I

facepalm

2010-06-22T15:00:00.000-04:00

father's day - pt 1

2010-06-20T19:13:00.000-04:00

First off, let me simply say Happy Father's Day to all the dads.

I will write more later on what happened today in my world, but for now I hope you enjoy the power of this cartoon.

an old headline that doesn't get old

2010-06-04T17:42:00.001-04:00

Apparently it was a word of mouth contest... which means if you don't get it, say it out loud.

a lost insight from matthew fox

2010-06-03T08:35:00.004-04:00

This comes from an interview that took place days before the show L O S T ended. I find it ironic and prophetic, given how so many people responded to the finale.

"You know, one of the great things about Lost - which I think has made it special - is that it has made people hypothesize and write out their own story. And so there is the danger that the way it ends is not going to be the way some people want it to end, and those people might be disappointed. But I think if they're open to what the show actually is it's a really beautiful ending."
- Matthew Fox, on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon

Interesting insight, and it can be applied to many things.

How often do we miss out on the true plot of life because we're so busy trying to rewrite the script in our own image?

odd things that odd things reveal

2010-05-29T15:48:00.000-04:00

While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it... thanks, Mario Kart.

a few insghtful good-bye videos for L O S T fans

2010-05-27T16:07:00.006-04:00

While many non-LOST fans are growing weary of this, I am enjoying the dialogue with the true fans. :)

Did you know, for instance, that there will be 12-14 minutes more material on the DVD that focuses on Hurley and Ben?

http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/watch_with_kristin/b183093_lost_epilogue_with_hurley_ben_revealed.html

So for all those who have felt invested into the show, check out this video I found... I only wish I had the time to make it myself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGn9a8ulJBo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEEp6TSbjk0

Here's another, which is a bit more tongue in cheek.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEEp6TSbjk0

And then finally, some of the answers you've hoped for... including the name of the "man in black."

http://www.eonline.com/videos/v53991_unanswered-lost-questions.html

a final, real-life spin on L O S T

2010-05-27T02:37:00.004-04:00

Over the past few days, I've had several conversations involving the finale of the show L O S T. Today I was able to share some perspective on it via my weekly newspaper column.

Click here to read that article: "L O S T" in Relationships

While much has been said on the topic of how the show ended, I'm more interested in the reason behind the debate it's caused. Here's what I've been able to discern from the big picture:

Some people watched the show for the characters: From the "opening" scene to the final "closure," we have been the real eyes that have watched every monumental moment that occurred in the survivors of Oceanic Flight 815. Along the way we learned about "Others" on the island, and many who were off the island with a tie to what was occurring. Throw in two more characters who made it all about good and evil and there were many people to care about and despise.
Some people watched the show for the mystery: Once upon a time there was an injured pilot who got attacked by "something" that made weird noises. Oh, and then there was a hatch in the island - what the heck? And then "others" who stole a boy? What about that weird cabin in the woods, or the weird whispers from invisible people, or the Dharma Initiative symbols all over the island? Can someone please explain the numbers?

All of these questions once were watercooler conversations, until many of those questions were answered. Some weren't, though. It seems that has driven a large number of people quite mad.
Some people watched the show for the production: Let's face it, this TV show has pulled in some of the best writing, production, and actors in all of entertainment history. What they accomplished in terms of set design on the island of Hawaii was amazing, not to mention the caliber of music that made every ordinary moment epic. It seemed like even some of the side characters were played by quality actors who could pull off some of the toughest scenes, as if even the "everyman" character (that likely represented you or I) could carry a portion of the show as needed.

I've realized that the people who fall into one category may struggle with the people in the other categories. For instance, someone who loves that the show has been about characters may not understand the angst of someone who wanted every question answered. Likewise, someone who enjoyed the show purely on a production level may not understand how attached fans became to the show.

My spin...

What is the point of LOST: According to the producers, it's about the characters. That's always been my spin as well. I wouldn't say that it's only about relationships, but I would say that all the mysteries are more scenery than the point of the show.

I know this is frustrating to people who wanted more of a tidy ending to the show, but consider life... you can argue that the people who were in your life 10 years ago who no longer are were a "waste of time" (i.e. Lost mysteries that were not answered). Or you can see how while they are not directly on your radar right now they contributed to a small or large piece of who you are and how you see life.

For instance, Dharma may seem "useless" since it didn't play into the finale... or did it? After all, wasn't Sawyer the man he was in this final season due to what happened to him during those three years with Juliet? Are Walt's powers as important as what his disappearance did to Michael, which in turn affected the survivor's rallying to go find them, confront the Others, learn about the agenda of the Others, learn about why that agenda existed (i.e. Jacob), and so on?

And what about the people we saw for a season but don't any more? Was learning about Mr Ecko a waste of energy? Or those Dharma guys last year? How about Shannon? And Boone? To say they didn't matter is like saying all a plant needs to grow is a seed. It needs foundation... soil... water... and so on. Each character on this show has affected another, just like how the person who cut you off in traffic today and made you miss the green light affected you more profoundly than you may ever realize.

In many cases, we should note, it took that one special moment with that one special person for it all to happen. Kate didn't just wear a mask... she was a mask. That is, until taking care of Aaron made her become vulnerable. Jack, likewise, had to realize his goal of getting off the island before he realized that it wasn't what he wanted. And so on.

Isn't it beautiful how in every failing there is a great victory, and in every victory there is a great failing?
What was the point of the "flash sideways?" and the finale?: When I watched the first episode of this season, I found myself more enlightened than confused. While many saw two storylines being played out that didn't seem to connect, I saw the same storyline being played out in two ways that I anticipated would merge into one. On one hand, the characters we knew were able to live out their life as if Oceanic 815 had never crashed. In another timeline, they were still on the island.

Or were they?

The key was always in Juliet's death. In her last moments before passing away, she uttered two lines of dialogue that seemed out of character for the moment. Later in that episode we found out her last thought was "It worked." That was our clue there that the two storylines would somehow merge. The question for me became "how?"

At first I wondered if it wouldn't be a sci-fi ending of sorts, with some character (Desmond or Jack) tying up the loose ends. Soon I realized that again the key was in Juliet dying... she had a near-death vision that she thought meant things had reset. In reality, she was entering the "afterlife" place that the flash-sideways was.

Then there was the issue of the final scenes... somehow I knew they would have to root us back to the show's core elements - the ensemble cast and the eye of Jack Shepherd. How fitting that they would both happen at the same time, both in the real-time era of the island and the non-time era of the afterlife.

Frankly, I know that ticked some people off... but isn't the purpose of any great show or movie to affect you in some way? To change you? To get you thinking about your own life versus merely solving why a hatch is on an island?
What about _____?: I hate to say this, but let it go. It's a TV show, and granted... it's one that you invested up to six years of your life into. Was the point always for you to be satisfied, or was it to be on a fictional journey that in some way played into your non-fiction life?

Consider - how many answers have you found in life, only to realize there is so much more you need to grow into? In the same way, even for all the things the characters on LOST accomplished there was still more to be done... Jack was Jacob's replacement, but then he needed Hurley; Widmore made it to the island, but didn't fulfill his purpose; Michael got Walt off the island, but their relationship dissolved; the Oceanic Six made if off the island, but needed to come back.

The unanswered questions of this show remind us of our own lives, and that's why we cry "NOT FAIR!" After all, entertainment is supposed to have the Hollywood ending, but this show reminded us that even when we save the world today we have to save it again tomorrow. And ultimately we will die and someone else will have to pick up that baton.

One day, that will all change... in the blink of an eye.

But for now, that is the merry-go-round we are on.

And if you don't like it, then you know how Locke must have felt when Ben kept all the secrets; or how Ben felt when un-Locke kept all the secrets.

Turns out the show keeps on giving, doesn't it? :)

So you can be as stuck in the past as Sawyer, Juliet, Miles, Farady, and Jin were...

or you can remember what today's date is.

So again, I encourage you to read that article up top I wrote and consider how what you've experienced in this show has added perspective to your own life that you may currently be unaware of.

And as a final note, I do appreciate the spiritual conversations that I've been able to have through LOST. A couple of years ago I did a sermon series on it that walked us through the book of Job, and man whose life truly embodied this scene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tg2tB_xTt9I

But again - this show involves the everyday as well as the eternal... faith and science... redemption and injustice... battles and babies. Maybe it’s understandable why everyone is flipping out - because when mysteries stay mysteries we become keenly aware of how our own life can feel unsatisfying.

Which, as a side point - or perhaps a core point - is worth noting. How is it that inside of us are we intuitively wired to yearn for resolution? It's as if deep down we know that there is more than what is in front of us, even though we can't see it.

Sounds like faith.

And in the same breath, we know that there are steps to take to move forward... even though we have to figure them out in real time.

Sounds like science.

Apparently, you can embody both.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=81WGWRWr89E

a few answers to L O S T found here

2010-05-26T11:39:00.000-04:00

Some insider answers to L O S T found here.

http://www.eonline.com/videos/v53991_unanswered-lost-questions.html

a lost review

2010-05-24T15:34:00.000-04:00

Regarding L O S T: I know many of you have asked if I liked the ending of the show or not. In short, I did for a number of reasons. I'm writing more about it in my weekly newspaper column this week, so I'll reference that link when it's up on Wednesday. In the meantime, here's an intriguing summary plus a lot of debate in the comments.

http://www.usatoday.com/life/television/reviews/2010-05-24-lostreview24_ST_N.htm?loc=interstitialskip

the force is with you, and it's vaaaaantastic!

2010-05-24T10:47:00.000-04:00

Lando Calrissian and Han Solo got to hang out together again.

Thirty years after starring together in "The Empire Strikes Back," Billy Dee Williams and Harrison Ford reunited at an anniversary screening of the classic film in Hollywood.

favorite L O S T moments - pt 5

2010-05-22T21:28:00.000-04:00

Continuing forward with some of my favorite LOST moments. Each post will cover a season.

Season Five

1) At last... we see Jacob... and anti-Jacob. Based on their conversation, the foundation of much of what has been going on the island is finally revealed.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTF2Vd--yIw

2) The initial end credit of the finale... turns white instead of black when Juliet detonates the bomb,.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avnR65UhV2c

3) "Let's face it... Ewoks suck, dude."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YvzG_xiTKuk

4) Sawyer and Jack finally... finally.... fight. I'm not a big fan of violence, but I understand where these swings came from.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxSphGdP-6c

5) "A twelve-year-old Ben Linus brought me a chicken salad sandwich. How do you think I'm doing?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjGyBdwwpuw

lost + seinfeld = ?

2010-05-21T14:16:00.002-04:00

What if LOST was more like Seinfeld?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7XnHhj3fsM8

ten things for ten people who won't listen

2010-05-21T11:27:00.015-04:00

Maybe you've seen it on a Facebook - a challenge to write ten things you haven't said to ten people (without mentioning their names).

Only... this is a difficult challenge for me since I tend to already be intentional and real in my relationships. This means means I've probably already said it, even if not everyone wanted to respond to such conversation.

Some people in your life that you really want to work things out with will pretend like they can't hear you; or when you ask someone to take a step forward in the friendship, they may seem to want to keep it surface level; other times you may try to help someone see a blind spot, but they'd rather not see it at all.

So my hurdle isn't in saying it, but in having the people I say it to actually listen. As a way to offload some of that frustration bottled up, I'm sharing it here and keeping the names anonymous... no need to turn this into a rant of gossip. But in sharing it I want you to understand a slice of my life that I can't seem to overcome, no matter how productive I attempt to be with others.

And by the way... I'm not giving up, even if the people I'm writing to seem to have for now. While I can't control their response, I can control my initiative.

Here is my list::

"Please... stop hinting. Just say it. If you need something, say it once in an upfront way instead of 10 times a tenth of the way. A lot of people around you would respond if you wouldn't dance around your needs or desires but simply and clearly ask."
"Seriously, what happened? One day we were friends, and then suddenly you stopped returning my phone calls and emails, and are all aloof like nothing changed. Um... I don't get it. You do remember we did hang out, and now we surprisingly don't, right? I'm okay if you don't want to hang out anymore, but please - show some maturity and have a conversation about it."
"You have some great thoughts to share with the world, but the way you're doing it is preventing anyone from giving you any credibility. And instead of seeing that and changing that, you seem to want to just turn up the volume. I want to help you with this."
"I can't do this alone. Please don't assume I can. It's way too important."
"I need you to ask me how I'm doing in this area I want to grow in. Will you do that?"
"It breaks my heart that you have settled into a life that looks amazing from the outside but is full of gaps on the inside. You have such a shield up, and while you may lower it at times you never do move it aside. And you really are missing out on how much larger life is, but the shine of your stuff and household activity keeps you from paying attention."
"I know what's really going on, and I know you'd like me to pretend that I don't. So we can either play this game or we can admit that something is going on and start talking about what's next."
"It's time... time for you to step up... time for you to lead those around you instead of letting them lead you. If you did this, and didn't give up, what would happen out of your life would be nothing short of amazing for everyone. But in the meantime... it isn't."
"You know that forgiveness you want when you hurt people on purpose or on accident? You need to give that, especially to ______________. I know you don't want to, because you think it's more productive to hold on to your pain. But if you don't let that pain go it's going to poison you with bitterness and blindness. Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting - it means that what happened doesn't have to have the final say. Don't let your pain define you... let it refine you."
"No. You're wrong."

Admittedly, I kind of laughed writing that last one because it's offensive in our world to say that. We've gotten so used to everyone having an opinion that words like "right" and "wrong" have become discarded or redefined. We say, "Let's agree to disagree" instead of "Let's agree to figure out what truly is right and wrong and be sure we both respond to that, even if it's uncomfortable."

Anyway... thanks for letting me share. Like I said earlier, there is nothing subversive about this statements - if I needed to share it with you, you've already heard me say it. If something resonated here, maybe it was the first time you've "caught" what I meant - or maybe it wasn't intended for you at all but what I wrote to someone else could be used as a tool in your life.

But I did write it because... well... what if someone hasn't shared with you yet the things on their heart?

And if they did... would you respond or withdraw?

Interact or avoid?

Grow forward or regress backward?

If we have something to work on together, let's work on it.

"Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses." (Proverbs 27:6)

favorite L O S T moments - pt 4

2010-05-20T22:03:00.000-04:00

Continuing forward with some of my favorite LOST moments. Each post will cover a season.

Season Four

1) We finally find out who is in the coffin. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdEbwo5x9lI

By the way - have you seen the alternate endings? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWWMYFAycmQ

Not a fan of them, but interesting that they were filmed.

2) The island... moves. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJ7jBi4Q-Yk&

3) Hurley does a cannonball... and finds out what happened to Charlie. Later, he tells Claire and we see one of the most honest grieving scenes we've seen up until this point.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luPMdhy0Mhs

4) "You realize we're the only two married guys on the island?" Jin and Bernard have a talk about what is the right thing to do. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruJ_rs-iEeE

5) Ben Linus does something sacrificial... as if he's beginning to embrace the idea that for the sake of something larger he will put his own agenda aside. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fef2KKMYJ54

favorite L O S T moments - pt 3

2010-05-19T11:25:00.002-04:00

Continuing forward with some of my favorite LOST moments. Each post will cover a season.

Season Three

1) One of the biggest curveballs on TV, and most people didn't understand it until the last scene. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxtRd4O2lUE

2) The man behind the curtain - as it turns out, there is something truly supernatural on this island... and its biggest showman (Ben Linus) is surprised the most. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Swhhw0-W_E

3) The season opens, and we finally get a glimpse of life for the "others" - including the everyday habits of a reading group. Ben Linus hits another homerun with, "So, I guess I'm out of the book club."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-KHJk2O5rGw

4) Charlie gives up his life... even though he doesn't have to. Yet he does - because somewhere deep within he believes that this is his moment to make a sacrifice for the greater good.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJIH2VmNWQI

Tie for #5:
5a) Jack finally tells Kate how he feels about her. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6QWLM3rmVQ

5b) Hurley saves the day. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_A480ag8pdQ

favorite L O S T moments - pt 2

2010-05-19T00:00:00.001-04:00

Continuing forward with some of my favorite LOST moments. Each post will cover a season.

Season Two

1) Breakfast with Henry Gale... what an amazing handling of this scene by every actor involved, especially Michael Emerson. It was *the* scene that took the chaos we had been experiencing up until that point and gave it a possible direction... and no one knew at the time whether this guy was legit or a faker. "You guys got any milk?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7oZe1x6EG0

2) Henry Gale is found out. I remember watching this scene and noting how the music timed perfectly with each progression, including eye twitches.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7oZe1x6EG0&feature=related

3) Mr Ecko and Charlie quote Psalm 23 together, each feeling a depth of meaning about it. Only later do we understand what it means to each, yet in the moment it was a declaration of a concrete faith in God.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PRtewT6cbc

4) Mr Ecko stands his ground against the smoke monster, and we finally get to see it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-Y64_GWpHw

5) Jack and Locke face off in debate about if they are on the island "for a reason" - who is right? The man of science or the man of faith?

favorite L O S T moments - pt 1

2010-05-17T18:29:00.000-04:00

In honor of a great TV show that I've enjoyed over the years and had many "watercooler" conversations about, here are some of my favorite LOST moments. Each post will cover a season, starting with the first.

Season One
1) The boat launch - a powerful instrumental of hope, full of character-to-character moments that transcend words.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeatX6Pagf0

2) End of season Flashback to the plane, and another pure instrumental soundtrack. Each character is initially lost in the plot of their own lives as they board the plane, until they occasionally begin to take note of each other... strangers at this point, unaware of their destiny together. John Locke and Jack Shepherd accidentally glance at one another, and each nods their head.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHP2QavTSUA

3) "Wash Away" - a soundtrack sequence where each character becomes more multi-dimensional than you though they were. My favorite moment - Michael, in slow motion, brings Walt his dog back. Walt shifts from aimless wandering to a full out run to embrace Vincent, and the father feels like a father by bringing joy to his son.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cq4Dsv7EdyQ

4) Hurley tells Jack that "Ethan" was not on the plane - the plot just got bigger.

5) Live together or die alone? In the midst of chaos, a leader named Jack Shepherd emerges.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fP7QrDR87M

a request for subway

2010-05-16T17:34:00.000-04:00

A polite request to anyone who works for Subway or who happens to have managerial sway.

Thank you.

in memory of... L O S T characters

2010-05-15T23:07:00.000-04:00

Lost... but not forgotten.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VK3H-yJJ3c&feature=related

in case it's prom night...

2010-05-15T20:28:00.000-04:00

Hey parents! It's prom night for many teens... and while it's common to let them do their thing, I want to encourage you to still parent them through it.

In other words, don't let it become a "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas" night.

You're still their mom and dad, and your kids may need some extra space tonight... or they may need some extra accountability.

You'll know which one it is. But either way, don't sever the link. If they're under your household, then they're "under your household."

So I write this to simply encourage you to be sure that you don't take your hands off the wheel. You probably won't - but I've seen it happen, and after years of working with students and seeing plenty of mistakes that are made on a night like tonight - "because it's prom" - I hope you receive this encouragement and not reject it.

Thanks! Praying your kid has an amazing night in the healthiest way possible.

And be sure to post all the cool pics online. :)

walking through the loss of a family pet - extended version

2010-05-13T00:40:00.002-04:00

His name was “C.K.” and I buried him last week.

For 15 years, he was my family’s dog, friend, household protector, and pet peeve. (If you’ve ever owned a dog, you know exactly what I mean.)

C.K. is short for “Clark Kent,” although many people assumed it meant we had a weird fascination with Calvin Klein perfume. My wife said I could give him this name since I’ve always been a Superman fan (and she’d never name our future kids “Lois” or “Clark”).

It all started 15 years ago when I headed out of our small house and kissed my bride goodbye. Standing on our mini-porch, we saw a little puppy actively sniffing around the property we lived on. My wife knew exactly where this was heading.

“We can’t.”

“But honey,” I said, “we haven’t even talked about it. Look, I know the ladies are coming over in a few minutes for lunch, so how about if he’s still here when I get back then we’ll talk about keeping him?”

“Argh, fine,” she said, heading in.

Double-checking she wasn’t looking out the window, I fed the dog. “Ironically,” he was still there when I came home. I lifted him up, put his face side-by-side with mine, and knocked on our door.

“Can we keep him?” I asked, flashing my brown eyes and his at my wife. She never had a chance to resist.

That first month was a challenge, for not only did C.K. arrive full of burrs and dirt but also had a codependency we hadn’t planned on. At night we tried putting him in our laundry room and kitchen, but his constant whining and scratching exhausted us to let him sleep on our bedroom floor.

There was also the hurdle of his desire to chew on everything. We once came home to find our backroom entirely full of paper products from our wedding that he’d shredded. In another home, the mail came through a slot on our door and C.K. would rip it out of the mailman’s hands, making bite marks that made bill paying quite humorous. Wherever we lived, we had to replace carpet… and in one home, an actual door that he ate his way through.

We couldn’t cage him either. Once when we tried we came home to find that he was walking around the house, and yet the cage was still intact. Granted, there was a handful of hair from where he’d forced his forty-pound medium-sized body through the two-inch gap between the bars.

Then again, this was life with our superdog and we were used to it. He was quirky, but he wasn’t aggressive. When my sons were born, C.K. did the usual sniffing and somehow knew and took on his role was to not be the “baby” of the household but to look out for them like he had us. Still, he enjoyed playtime, be it “let’s chase the squirrel” to “hey, give me my sock back.” Whenever we’d play family hide-and-seek, C.K. always give my position away.

Five years ago we had to temporarily move in with my wife’s parents. Unfortunately, C.K. couldn’t come with and it was difficult for us all. He became a symbol of hope for when life would feel “normal” again. After 11 months apart, we were all tears when we picked him up from a kind caretaker.

Speaking of which, our dog moved with my wife and I as many times as we did. Just as our lives needed to adjust to new relationships and surroundings, he rolled with the new sights and smells as well. Over the years we tried to make it easy on him... often buying vehicles that he'd have a special spot to ride in. Before kids, we even bought two station wagons for this very purpose.

And then there were those moments when our boys made C.K. "their dog." We eased them into this through play, but then they gradually took on the responsibilities of feeding him and giving him water. It's weird to see your kids take on ownership of something you originally committed to, but that's part of a household legacy, isn't it? When C.K. wanted to get into my bedroom at night, he'd thump his head against the door. If it happened to be closed, we'd hear him thump his head against the boys' doors.

I can still hear the thump.

And I still expect him to come down the stairs with me when I head into my basement office.

Or pick up the food I happened to drop on the kitchen floor.

And this year... we won't be buying him the traditional Flintstoned-sized bone that he can barely lift.

About a year ago we noticed that C.K. had lost his hearing and the spring in his step was fading. The vet told us it would get bad, so I went out and dug a hole on a friend’s property, preparing for the worst. It turned out My boys prayed for him every day, and God did give us an extra year with my “puppy.” And then last week when he exhibited symptoms that revealed it was going to end soon and badly.

Many of you may face a similar situation, so here are the steps we took, right or wrong:

We determined not to react. This last year was hard, as not only did C.K. became more codependent but he didn’t realize how loud his natural noises had become. He also struggled with natural body functions, from horrible gas to random urination. My wife and I resolved, though, to not end it because it was inconvenient, modeling commitment to our kids.
We called our veterinarian. While I was alarmed by what I saw, I knew I needed to talk with my vet into order to speak to my kids with credibility.
We sat down as a family. I began with, “We know C.K. has been really sick a long time. God gave us an extra year with him, but I spoke with C.K.’s doctor and she told me that it’s gotten worse and he is dying. We have the choice to let her help him die without pain, and that’s what mom and I believe we should do.”
We dialogued honestly. My 9-year old wanted to know what would happen, and my 6-year old wanted to know if we’d see him in heaven. We took each aside and gave them simple, true answers that matched their questions without “over-answering” them.
We used technology. I gave the boys a digital camera and camcorder to record a “last day” with C.K. The memories they made will last a lifetime.
We kept the appointment. As I pulled out of the driveway with our dog, I heard my boys cry out in a way I hope I never hear again. As tempting as it was to turn around, I took our dog to the vet while my wife comforted the boys at home. Everyone wept hard, including me.
We had back-up. I knew I’d be an emotional wreck so I had a good friend help me transport and bury our dog. I also can’t say enough good things about our vet, Dr Janine Pepin. She created a warm environment for a hard moment, took paw prints of our dog for my boys to keep, and even sent flowers that arrived at our home within an hour of it all happening.
We followed-up personally. I purchased flat stones for our family to decorate – a large headstone and four medium-sized squares. We decorated them with personal thoughts, and later placed them by his grave.
We didn’t move on. Many people have asked if we plan to get another pet, but we haven’t. It’s easy in our world to “replace” our hurt with something new, but clogging up a hole doesn’t help it to heal.

I know some people will disagree with our decisions, thinking we either waited too long or should’ve let our dog die naturally and painfully. I’ve learned, though, that many adults tell their psychologists that their first defining experience with death was the loss of a pet. Those who experienced a tragic chaos of an animal crying out and dying seem to fear death; others talk about the difficult-but-controlled circumstances they went through in putting an animal down and how it helped them recognize the role death currently plays in our world.

One day it won’t, though. That’s incredible news for those of us who embrace God’s promise that “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”(Revelation 21:4)

In the meantime, the Bible isn’t clear on if our pets are in heaven, although it does hint at the presence of animals. My boys hope that one day we’ll see our dog again, and I think my wife and I yearn for that, too.

But it doesn't say... no matter what my heart wants it to say. Many animal lovers speak about this with positive conviction, but the truth is that at best we just have a good guess. So I'll toss my guess in that direction, too.

All I know is his name was “C.K.” and I buried him last week.

twice the dos

2010-05-05T22:16:00.001-04:00

When people tell me, "Today is 'Cinco de Mayo, May 5th" I feel like I am on an episode of Dora The Explorer or Handy Manny where they say things in both languages.

(You know those shows could be half as long if they would stop doing that.)

kfc sandwich - revisited and elvis-sized

2010-04-28T13:49:00.000-04:00

You know that new KFC sandwich that is horribly bad for you?

A couple of guys decided to "Elvis-size" it.

Check it out HERE.

grandpa george gets the shaft

2010-04-25T23:06:00.001-04:00

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is on right now, and I am again reminded how much Charlie gives Grandpa George the shaft.

You probably recall the moment when Charlie comes running in to tell his family that he found the last golden ticket to visit the infamous chocolate factory. Quickly, he invites Grandpa Joe to be his guest family member at the big visit.

Grandpa Joe gets out of the creepy four-person bed, citing that it's the first time he's done so "in twenty years."

Okay... do you realize what that says about how many bedpans Charlie's mom has been taking care of this whole time? And then Grandpa Joe hops up and does a little dance around the room... as if to rub it in Charlie's mom has to be thinking, "I can't believe you could have gotten up to use an actual bathroom this whole time, you faker!"

But the real person who gets the shaft? Grandpa George.

He's still in bed, staring up at all the action in pure disbelief.

Grandpa George's face says it all: "Uh...kid? You know, I'm sitting right here. Thanks. Way to make me feel like cardboard scenery."

Notice that he doesn't speak at all in this scene, but simply gazes with his mouth wide open. You would, too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29_uSlEEPSk

hairy revelations

2010-04-22T22:00:00.000-04:00

A very informative graph explaining the correlation of lifestyle versus facial hair length.